


Kizami's Misery

by Storiesarelife1903



Category: Corpse Party (Video Game)
Genre: Adult Content, Blood, Explicit Language, F/M, Romance, Sexual Content, Violence, Yandere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-01
Updated: 2015-10-11
Packaged: 2018-03-26 15:09:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 24
Words: 62,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3855175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storiesarelife1903/pseuds/Storiesarelife1903
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A new girl transfers to Byakuden Senior Highschool, much to Kizami's disinterest. At first... Akane Hayashi is a beautiful, bright and generally sweet girl. However, once Akane and Kizami become closer, he begins to learn of her true personality. That and the fact that, due to the discovery of eachothers true selves, Akane falls 'madly' in love with Kizami. So much so that she would do anything to be with him. </p><p>Contains bloody violence and maybe some adult content later on.</p><p>(Last Chapter Edited SoThat It Sounds A Bit Better?)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Appearances Are A Mere Illusion

**Author's Note:**

> Second post! Yay! This idea had been in my head for a while. I just love the idea of Kizami having 'an other half' (no pun intended ). Especially if it's a yandere. Of course there will be more than one chapter. I'm just not sure if I should make this graphic or not later on. Well, I can cross that bridge when I get to it. Until then, enjoy!

One moment she was invisible, and the next she was as clear as the summer sky. "Alright, class. We have a new student joining our class". At first, it was like looking at a blind spot. "Please, introduce yourself to the class". If only it stayed that way. If only..."Good morning everyone. My name is Akane Hayashi. I look forward to working with you all today". "Very good. There should be a spare seat behind Kizami-kun". "Thank you, miss". If only I didn't raise my head when she approached my desk. Then maybe things would have stayed the same. First, it was the clicking off her shoes against the floorboards. Second, it was the sweet smell of her long black hair as it swayed in my direction. Finally, it was her piercing glance towards me. At that moment, our eyes met. Just me, her and the backround noise of the teacher's distant words as she began the lecture, along with the scribbling of student's pencils against notes. Looking at her, I felt as if I was staring into an alternate universe. Her dark hair and ocean blue eyes. She stared right back with a questionable gaze. "U-uhh...". She stammered, her cheeks a slight pink. "Wh-who are you?". Her question was what broke the barrier between what will be and what could have been. With only a split second of thought, I answered her.

"Kizami...Yuuya Kizami". Hayashi stared at me for several seconds without a word. She then gave me a smile that could light up every room in the school. A relaxed and gentle smile that could have looked fake when it came to anyone else. But not me. "It's nice to meet you, Kizami-kun. I look forward to working with you". And with that, we went our seperate ways. Hayashi-san continued to the desk behind me. The scraping of her chair rang out in my ears. At the time, I disregarded her. I could have done that when she asked for my name. But I didn't.

I listened to the teacher's lecture with no questions to pass my mind, as if nothing happened. Little did I know that the events that would soon follow involved that girl, who currently sat behind me. For now, our physical distance was but a few inches away, while our familiarity was far from eachother. That would all soon change within the course of a few weeks, perhaps a month or so. Until then, in this one hour of class, we sit in silence and say not a word to the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a good feeling about this story. I have a good feeling that this won't suck. I have a feeling that I will get writers block about halfway through the story. Right now I'm going to add the second chapter already, just to get the ball rolling. (Teehee...rolling. I'm so lonely...). Anyway, I hope that you fabulous individuals enjoyed the first chapter. The second one should be up in a few minutes, or is already up, depending on the time that people read this. Thanks for reading. Bye.  
> * Runs away for a few minutes only to come back for the second chapter*


	2. Masks Of White and Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, second chapter. In the beginning things might start of kind of slow, but that will pass eventually. In this chapter, it's about their first encounter with eachother. We'll see how it goes. Enjoy! Also, I own none of the Corpse party characters, aside from OC-chan.

Biology class. One of the only classes that I take for fun. Learning about the human body is fascinating. We very rarely conduct experiments of any kind because there are plenty of notes to take. During the time of this specific class was on the second day that Hayashi-san had transferred. She kept to herself on the first day, sitting alone during lunch without a word to anyone. She's like a reminder of myself during pre-school, before I met Kurosaki. 

"Alright, class, we have a treat today". The teacher began the lesson, lowering the chalkboard to show a well-drawn diagram. "Dissection ". He announced, receiving several displeased sounds from the rest of the class. I, on the other hand, was quietly fascinated. I had plenty of practice as a child so this would be a walk in the park. The professor began telling us to grow up, and that it wasn't that bad, before pairing us up. One boy and one girl. "Hayashi, the new girl, can go with Kizami". That had to be a coincidence. Pairing me up with the girl that I brief meeting with yesterday. She stood at my counter without a word, putting on the protection glasses and plastic gloves as I did. Each pair received a frog, which had been put to sleep. Soon it would sleep forever. "Would you like to do it, or shall I?" Hayashi-san offered with a straight expression. "You can do it, if you want to. If you're too scared then I can do it. It's up to you ". Hayashi-san looked down at the frog for a moment. I expected her to give me the scalpel in disgust. However, she took a relaxed hold of it, slicing open the frogs belly vertically. I watched, suprised and a little amazed by her actions.

"Go right ahead". She said, pushing her finger into the bloody opening. I joined in, examining the insides. Our fingers touched. "Ah...That's my...". "Sorry". "N-no, don't apologise. I'm such a goofball. This is my first time doing an experiment like this and I'm acting so calm. Is that weird?" "Not to me. That just shows how mature and strong-willed you are". Hayashi-san giggled. "Are you usually this nice to girls?" "No. Usually I just tend to avoid girls, with rare exception. By that, I mean a friend of a friend - don't get the wrong idea". She giggled again. "Haha. You're pretty weird, too. I like that". What was with this girl? She had such an understanding and carefree attitude. Usually such a personality would only be worth observing so that I had a clear idea about how to deal with her. Strangely enough, I felt like I could be neutral with her. I didn't have to put on a fake smile and humour her. "That makes two of us". I responded honestly to her remark. "Oh, so you think that I'm pretty weird, too? Well, you're not wrong. I guess I am a little weird". "There's nothing wrong with that". The professor walked up to our station to examine our progress. "Very good. The rest of the class can learn from you two". "Thank you, sir". Hayashi-san responded with a proud smile. I didn't know what to think of this girl. Really. It was questionable. After class, I packed up my notes and went on to leave for my next class. As I walked out, I heard a familiar voice behind me. "Hey, Kizami-kun, wait up". I stopped and turned without really thinking about it. Hayashi-san greeted me with a smile, it seemed like her trademark. "Uh, hello, Hayashi-san. Is everything okay? ". "Yes. Absolutely. I was just wondering if, umm, i-if you...". Hayashi-san's cheeks became a little red. Her eyes were darting around towards anything but my face. "Would you like to talk again sometime? ". Her awkward request left me feeling a bit caught off - guard. "Um, sure. We could have lunch together if you would like". Hayashi-san then looked up at me, her bashfulness more apparent. "R-really? O-okay. I'll see you then". Hayashi-san then waved to me as she passed by. Despite her lack of composure when talking to me just then, she walked away calmly with a balanced posture. What an odd girl. What could spending time with her have in store for me? I said yes to be polite. But if only I knew then that her simple bashfulness meant a lot more. That it meant a lot more than just a girl asking a boy if they could become closer.I sighed, making my way down the hallway while taking my mind away from Hayashi-san for the last time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's the second chapter done. These are a bit short, but I plan to make them longer as the story progresses. I'll try and keep the writing at a decent level, which means not being lazy and just putting sentences together. I can be descriptive in my writing. Also, the two main characters, Kizami and Akane, will have character development in order to bring the two closer for now. I will make it work. Enough rambling. Thank you to anyone who read this. Until next time...


	3. One and The Same

During my other classes, right before lunch, I couldn't help but ponder about something that had just suddenly began circling my mind. The thought of repetition. Daja vu, in other words. When thinking of Hayashi-san; listening to her voice, picturing her face in my minds-eye, and seeing her blush, I couldn't help but wonder if I had seen it all before. How cliché. I tried to keep my thoughts level with my school work. Thinking about such a trivial thing would only get worse. Although, I was still curious about it. Just who in the world was she?

The bell signalling students to leave for lunch rang out throughout the hallways. I stood up and turned towards Hayashi-san, who sat behind me. " Are you coming?" I asked. "Uh, we're not going to have lunch here?" "No. I know a better place that's around the campus. Come on". Hayashi-san picked up her lunch and followed close behind me. At the corner of my eye, I could see my 'friends' and Kurosaki gathered around a group of desks, eating and talking without paying any mind towards me and Hayashi-san walking together. I had already told Kurosaki in advance, during class, that I wouldn't be joining them. He didn't seem to mind or question it. He probably understood that it may have been my business only. I actually appreciated that.

Outside of the school, not many students wandered around. Most of them, during lunch, would either be in classes, clubrooms or the roof. I lead the way to the walkway between the two buildings. Not many students walked across during the first half an hour or so. It was quiet, there was shade and I could have a private conversation with Hayashi-san. "Did you make your own lunch?" She asked, filling the silence. "Yes, I did. How about you?" "Yep. I'm quite proud of it, actually". I had my reasons for having to cook for myself. Not just lunch. Breakfast and dinner, too. Very rarely do I have to eat convenience store food anymore. "Um, Hayashi-san,". I began to change the subject. "Have we ever met before?" She looked a bit puzzled, but considered the possibility in thought. "Hmm... No, I don't think we have. Why are you asking all of a sudden?" Strange. Even when she said that, the thought lingered at the back of my mind. "Sorry. My mistake. You have a familiar face, I guess". That was all I could say. Hayashi-san actually looked more like a rare breed. She was quite pretty - even I had to admit. "Heehee, I'm not that average, am I?" "Quite the opposite, actually". "What do you mean by that?" "Well, for one, you have a certain quality that defines you as...unique, separating you from other girls". "Is that so? I'm...flattered". Hayashi-san averted her gaze, a light shade of pink appearing on her cheeks. "So, uh, what quality would that be?" I hesitated. It's not as if I said something like that for the sake of saying it. I truly felt that I knew this girl from the past. Why do I care? I'm not entirely sure myself. "You're a little odd, I'll give you that". "Uh! Meanie!" Meanie? Is she secretly an elementary schooler? Still, I found her childish comeback kind of amusing. 

"So, Hayashi-san, what brought you to this school - if you don't mind my asking?" Hayashi-san brought her legs up to her chest, relaxing her body against the waist-high wall of the walkway as she answered. "It's a long story. But it's also based heavily on personal reasons. Sorry...". "That's alright. Your reasons are your reasons, alone. You don't have to tell me. I was just asking to be polite". "I understand that my transferral was sort of out of the blue. If you really want to know, I might tell you eventually". "No, you don't have to". "But...You're the one person who I absolutely have to tell...eventually...". Hayashi-san's voice went quiet, and then silence. What was that supposed to mean? Why me? Hayashi-san raised her head to me with a kind smile, as if what she said never happened. "Well, looks like class will start soon. Do you want to start heading back?" "Yeah. That sounds fine". "Okay, then. You know this school better than I do, so lead the way". I began walking on ahead, on the way to class. Hayashi-san walked even closer behind me. It was...uncomfortable. I stopped thinking about it. Or at least tried to. With Hayashi-san close behind me, I got the strangest feeling that I had to keep walking until I was back at my desk in class.


	4. Quirky Is a Kind Word For Madness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter should be better than the last three since there's more stuff going on. These should get a bit longer as the story progresses. Enough said. Time to move on.
> 
> I don't own Corpse Party or any of the characters, except for OC-chan.

I walked home with Kurosaki that evening. Due to serious family issues, I don't live with my 'oh-so-loving' parents anymore. Currently I live in a cheap apartment with decent rent. The only way I can get by is to work two part - time jobs. It used to be just one while I was still living in that house, but ever since I moved, I had to work even harder at school to catch up. It's not as challenging anymore. You get used to it after a few months of living alone. 

"Hey, Kizami, is it alright if I come over to your place on Saturday for studying? Y'know, after school?" "Sure. Why, are you finding it difficult?" "Y-yeah. A little. You know what I'm like". I didn't mind helping Kurosaki out when he needed it. There have been times when he's done similar things for me. The least I could do was pay him back. "Thanks, Kizami. I owe you one". "No problem". We were nearing Kurosaki's house. Of course, I lived further away from him since I moved. Kurosaki and I used to walk to school together all the time when we were children. But it doesn't mean that I don't catch the train with him or walk back home with him. He still insists on it. "So, uhh, I saw you talking to Hayashi-san at lunch". "So what? That doesn't mean anything". "Okay, okay. But, you have to admit, she's really pretty. Beautiful, even. Like an angel". "An angel, huh? Yeah, I guess so". She did sort of give off an angelic vibe, despite her odd personality. Kurosaki smirked at me with suggestive eyes. "I think you like her". Now that was just crazy. "No way. She's sweet and pretty, but...I don't see her that way". "Hm. You do seem like the gentlemanly type, so you could easily get away with saying that. However, you're still a man, Kizami. A girl like her could be a nice change of pace. Plus, have you seen her bust size? Holy shit...I wouldn't even know what to do with that". That was a bit much. "Don't say things like that. I'm no expert, but you should learn how to speak appropriately, especially in front of a woman". "Says the guy who used to call his big sister a...What was it? A...bitch?" That was totally different. I was a kid then. And my elder sister is a bitch. "She's an exception". "Yeah, you're right. Seriously, Kizami. Your big sister still scares the shit outta me". "I know, Kurosaki. I know". 

Kurosaki and I said our goodbyes once we reached his house. I walked on, back to my apartment building. It wasn't exactly the greatest living space, but there was a stable ceiling, heating, water and electricity. I placed my bag on top of the kotatsu (if you don't know what that is, look it up). Sighing, I headed for the bathroom. Nothing else had to happen today. I could just take a shower, change and finish off my homework before preparing dinner. I entered the bathroom, beginning to strip. I would feel a lot more relaxed when I was out of my uniform and in some loose clothes. While I did so, I thought about what Kurosaki said. Heh, how could he just assume that I was attracted to a girl when I had only just met her? I'm not like everyone else. I'm not interested in being in a relationship. It sounds pointless. Having someone cling to you, going on dates, being intimate...It all sounds so mundane. The only way I could ever have something as trivial as a girlfriend or...boyfriend - or whatever, it would have to be with someone who understands me perfectly. Someone that I could have fun with. Someone that could make me 'feel' these things known as 'emotions'. Geez...The hot steam of the shower was probably making me dizzy, thinking ridiculous things. I decided to turn it off, if that was the case. I felt a lot better, anyway. 

That night, I finished my homework and had a small dinner. I lay under the kotatsu, letting my mind go blank. I looked at the clock hanging on the wall in the kitchen. 19.43. Still early. I could go to the convenience store for some snacks. I needed to buy some stuff anyway. Getting up, I went to get my wallet from my uniforms pants pocket. I really needed a safer place to keep it. I had neatly set my uniform in my room, like I always do. Keeping things in a certain place in order to keep a neat house becomes something of a habit. I dug my hand into the back pocket, where I keep my wallet and student ID. I took out my wallet but..."Huh...?" My student ID wasn't there. I sighed, frustrated. When the hell did I lose that?! "God dammit!" I cursed out loud. What a bother. I would have to figure it out later. I looked through my wallet to check my money. It was a good thing that I, at least, still had my wallet. From now on, as much of an inconvenience it was, I had to keep my wallet in my bag for school. 

Just then, there was a knock at the door. I turned to the noise curiously. 'Who could be visiting at this hour?' I thought. And then it struck me. Haruna, my smothering, bitch of a big sister. She forcefully stopped by my apartment without any warning and definitely without my permission, to check if I was 'still alive', as she put it. I groaned. I really didn't want to see her today, or any day. But she would just keep pestering me until I opened the door. I tried to pretend that I wasn't home one time, but she just waited outside for god-knows how long. "Alright, fine". I said to myself. This time she would get an earful. I went for the door, ready to tell her to mind her own business. When I opened the door, however...

"What do you wa-...". I began, only to stop myself halfway when I saw who it truely was. "H-hayashi-san..?" Yes, the girl whom I had lunch with just a few hours ago was standing in my doorway with an unreadable expression on her face. Her cheeks were a slight red, as if she had just ran here. Her eyes had a look of nervousness written on them. And her lips quivered as she tried to speak. "U-u-um...G-good evening, Kizami-kun. I, uh..." What the hell was happening? Why was she here? No. How did she get here in the first place?! I talked calmly to her. It was the best solution so I could find out what she was up to. "Hayashi-san, why are you here? And, how did you know where I live?" Did she follow me? That would be beyond crazy if she did. "Er, we-well...I live in an apartment building close by. I managed to get an early train so that I could buy groceries. When I was heading back, I saw you come into this building, so...". That made sense. But that didn't explain why she came to my apartment. "I, uh, came to return this ". Hayashi-san presented a small book. My student ID. "I found this on the floor, by your desk. I tried to find you to return it sooner but you had already left". I accepted my student ID with a 'thank you'. "I really appreciate that". "It's no trouble, really. I was more than happy to return it. Any person in the right mind would". Is that so? "It's pretty late. I could walk you home to make sure that you're safe". "Really? I-I mean, that's okay! I can manage". "Well, if you're sure. Goodnight, then". I began to close the door at a quick pace. Then something happened so suddenly...Something that I didn't expect at all. 

Slam! 

The door stopped just as I was about to close it. I didn't really noticed what the cause was until I looked down. The hairs on my arms and neck stood. Not out of fear, but out of the sudden suprise as to why Hayashi-san's foot was wedged inbetween the door and the wall. "H-hayashi-san?" She didn't respond. I slowly opened the door to meet with her once more. Her head was lowered so I couldn't read her expression through the shadows of her dark hair. "That hurt...". She mumbled. Quickly she raised her head with a bright and friendly smile. "That hurt, you coo-coo head!" Coo-coo head? Just what sort of mannerism is that? "But, I'll have to admit, it was mostly my fault. My reflexes sorta kicked in on their own, quite literally, haha". You don't say. "Uh, right. Is your foot okay?" "It hurts a bit - but I should be fine. Don't worry". Then maybe you shouldn't have wedged your foot into the crack of the door. "I could look at it. It might be bruised since I did shut the door with a bit of force. Plus, these are atomatic, so it would be quite heavy on your foot". Hayashi-san looked down at her foot as if she was debating whether to have it checked or not. Her cheeks turned pink again. "Well...if you're sure. Excuse me". She said as I allowed her to enter the apartment. 

Slipping off her shoes, Hayashi-san looked around the apartment as if she had never seen one before. It was a traditional japanese living space. Anyone in this country would at least get the gist of what it looks like. "This is just like my apartment. Although, this one is a bit smaller". "Your apartment? You don't live with your parents?" "Uh, no...I wanted to try and stand on my own two feet. Leave the birds nest, y'know?" Hayashi-san sat down on the floor. I kneeled in front to check her foot, as I said I would. "Do you mind?" I asked, suggesting that I remove her knee-high sock. "Go right ahead ". I slipped it off, revealing her smooth and delicate leg, like a ballet dancers. "Does this hurt?" I lightly squeezed her foot, "Ah...!" making her jolt. "S-sorry. That took me by surprise. To answer your question, yeah...It hurt a little". I sighed. "There's nothing that I can really do except give you pain killers and bandage it up. Is that okay?" "Uh-huh. That would help. Thank you". "Okay, then. I'll prepare some tea and get your pain-killers. Wait right there".

Hayashi-san and I sat in silence. She quietly sipped the tea that I had made while I bandaged up her foot. All the while I could simply feel the tension in her body from nervousness or embarrassment. That and the light blush on her face. I'm a man. Hayashi-san is a woman of the same age. This wasn't exactly 'intimate', but if anyone could watch this moment, they would probably say otherwise. "Alright, all done. How do you feel?" "Ah! Umm, a lot better. Thank you very much". See? For a reason that I can only assume, Hayashi-san was really nervous. "Kizami-kun, you...You're really kind...and sweet. I'm sure that if this was a boy, like Kai Shimada, he would have taken advantage. But you're a really kind man. So, thank you...". What's with that look? Hayashi-san's eyes now showed sincerity. Her ocean blue irises sparkling slightly in the light of the room. "There's no need to thank me". I looked to the clock again. 20.54. "It really is late now. Come on. I have no other choice but to walk you home". "N-no. You've done enough for me. Really ". "This will be the last thing. I'll feel like a bastard if I don't walk you home". Hayashi-san got up, blushing harder. "O-okay. I-if you insist. I'll pay you back sometime. I promise". I couldn't really respond to that. If I said no she would probably puff out her cheeks and insist on it until I gave in. Yeah, that sounded like her.

We reached the apartment building just a few blocks away. She wasn't lying when she said that she lived close by. I like an honest person. "This is me. I guess that I'll see you in school tomorrow". "Yeah. I'll see you then". Hayashi-san didn't leave yet. In fact, she hesitated. "Um...I will pay you back for your hospitality. I swear". "Hayashi-san, that isn't-". "Since I don't have anything to give you right now,". She interupted, her head lowered. "I guess I'll start with this". Hayashi-san then leaned up on her toes swiftly. Her lips met my cheek. They were...soft and warm. I wasn't expecting this, either. This girl was full of strange suprises. Never before had I received a kiss from someone. This was the first. Hayashi-san pulled away, her face bright red. "U-um, I-i'll see you t-tomorrow, then. B-bye!" Hayashi-san then darted into her apartment building. I really couldn't deal with that girl. Shrugging off what happened I started to walk back home. While I did so, I exposed a half-smile. Watching Hayashi get flustered and embarrassed over me was amusing. I traced the tips of my fingers across the place where she kissed and thought...'Still warm...'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, something happens. I try my best to come up with situations that match together with eachother - and I believe that I have done just that. Not just for this chapter but for a later chapter. Readers will definitely find out later on. Thanks for reading the third chapter. I'll see you later. Bye.


	5. The Tiger Behind The Pretty Pink Cage

I looked up at the clear summers sky with my hands stuffed into my pockets. It was a Sunday, no school today. I didn't really have anything to do other than go for a walk until I worked up an appetite. Kurosaki's grandparents were visiting his house, Fukuroi and Mitsuki were studying together. I wouldn't hang out with Shimada in a million years. Urabe and Kirisaki were probably in town shopping, as they mentioned in the student council room. I would rather be alone, anyway. Sometimes it's easier. I walked past the train station, or I was going to, at least. I halted when I saw a familiar face. 

She was sitting alone on a bench, waiting for a train, perhaps? Why did I have to approach her? I didn't. But something about her being by herself on the weekend got me curious. Talking with her wasn't a bad thing either. I slowly walked towards her. She didn't see me at first, until I sat down and greeted her. "Hey". I said casually. Hayashi-san quickly turned her head. She looked suprised for a second. "Oh, Kizami-kun. You suprised me there". Her expression softened. "Sorry. May I ask why you're out here by yourself?" "I'm not working today. I don't really have anyone to hang out with either. What about you?". "I'm the exact same way. What a coincidence". Has everything up to this point been a coincidence with this girl? She squirmed on the wood of the bench. Her hands were placed delicately on her lap. Looking at her closely, her appearance was a lot clearer. Hayashi-san was a good dresser, expensive looking braclets hung on her wrist, her hair held a pink ribbon that was neatly done. Also, Hayashi-san wasn't wearing make-up. Her beauty was completely natural. I have seen a lot of fake girls before, but Hayashi-san wasn't one of them. "So, um, Kizami-kun, would you like to...hang out with me, instead?" I couldn't really say no. A trip into town with her wouldn't be so bad. "Sure. That sounds fine. We could take the train into town and find something to do. How about that?" Hayashi-san smiled, pushing some loose strands of hair behind her ear. "That sounds great. I would love to".

Hayashi-san and I took the next train into the next town. Usually on weekdays the trains would be packed with people, shoulder-to-shoulder. But it was quite empty on a Sunday. Today, at least. Since it was pretty much empty, there were seats available. I sat next to Hayashi-san without speaking a word. Conversation wasn't one of my best qualities. Although, it appeared that Hayashi-san was similar. She was looking out of the window, the morning light reflecting from her clear skin. "Hey, Kizami-kun, I'm still new to this place. Can you please show me around?" "No problem. If you have a type of place in mind I can try and take you there". "Thank you". Hayashi-san settled down in her seat, leaning back against the chair. I had to stop staring at her. Why would I stare in the first place? I moved my gaze away from Hayashi-san. 

The town was busier than the train. I wouldn't have expected anything less. Hayashi-san didn't care. She looked around in astonishment. "Wow, the buildings are so tall. There's so many people too". "Have you never been to a big city like this?" Hayashi-san scratched her cheek. "I'm more of a country girl. I grew up in a small and more traditional community. There weren't a lot of stores around. Not like these anyway". That explained a lot. Just then a random stranger walked right by, bumping into Hayashi-san on the way. "Sorry!" He quickly apologised, giving a quick bow before rushing off. Due to what just happened, Hayashi-san then bumped into me and stuck there. Her hand was lightly holding mine, and her chest pressed against my arm. I could feel her fast heartbeat. "S-sorry, Kizami-kun. I'll be more careful". She was hopeless. What else could I do? Just as she pulled back, I grabbed hold of her hand. "K-Kizami-san...?" "Don't get the wrong idea. This is just a precaution so that you don't get lost. This is a busy city and you're new here, if you go missing I'll have to take responsibility". Her face reddened at my words. "Okay. If you say so". Hayashi-san's hand was sweating and shaking. She didn't hold my hand back. She allowed me to lead the way and that was it. 

For each store we went to, we of course unlinked hands. We looked around for small luxuries to buy. I didn't really need anything as I'm not very materialistic. I think that the only thing that I bought was a new leather jacket, since my first one ripped. Hayashi-san looked around as I did, buying a few clothing items and even a heart - shaped plushie. Then there was a particular store that we stopped at, again just to browse. It was a jewellery store. Now, I'm only going to say this once but...I'm quite fond of silver trinkets. They're nice to have. Nothing too flashy or expensive. 

I looked towards the mens jewellery cabinet. They were nice, just out of my price range. Looking towards Hayashi-san, she looked at the different jewellery pieces with wonder. I stood next to her to examine them for myself. "They're gorgeous, aren't they". "I suppose. Are you planning to buy one?" "No. None of them would suit me, anyway. They're pretty, just a bit much for me". I looked over to the further cabinets. A lot of the pieces were bulky and flashy. Hayashi-san was right. They didn't suit her at all. However, I spotted one jewellery piece that stood out amongst the big, sparkling jewellery. Inside a single glass cabinet was a stand. Placed on that stand was a small, delicate and shiny necklace. The tiny chains were silver, the trinket was a 3D heart, encrusted with tiny black and blue jewels. "Excuse me," I called to the shopkeeper behind the counter. She came by to greet me. "Good afternoon. How can I help you?" "Hi, um, how much is this delicate - looking necklace?" "The price range for that necklace is approximately ¥3,000". That was a lot cheaper than the other necklaces displayed here. Also, was I really going to get this for Hayashi-san? Isn't that the sort of thing that couples do? Well, it would be something that she would like. "Hey, Hayashi-san, what do you think of this necklace?" Hayashi-san came over curiously, gasping when she saw the necklace. "It's really beautiful". "That settles it. I'll take it". "Wh-what? You don't have to do that for me. Absolutely not. That thing is really pretty, but-" "Then it suits you perfectly". What sort of filth was coming out of my mouth? Ugh...I sounded like a character from a shounen novel. "I...I don't know what to say...". But Hayashi-san seemed happy. And not just with the gift. "No one has ever given me a gift before". From how she said it, she didn't sound like she was exaggerating. Her voice was quiet and sad. It made me want to ask questions. But I didn't want to pry into business that definitely wasn't my own. 

Hayashi-san walked out of the store with me, wearing her new necklace and a smile on her face. "I guess that I'll have to pay you back in double this time. What will it be?" "No, no. I don't expect you to buy anything or give anything to me". "That's unfair for you. At least let me pay for lunch today. Please? I won't take no for an answer". I rolled my eyes. "Okay, fine. After lunch we can head back. Sound good to you?" "Yep...". We stopped at a cafe for lunch. As we waited at our table, Hayashi-san admired the trinket of her new necklace with a smile. I was right. It looked charming. "You really like that necklace, huh?" "Of course I do. It was a gift from you". "What's that supposed to mean?" Hayashi-san giggled. "Teehee. Nevermind...". I sighed. How long before I finally figure out Hayashi-san's personality? The waitress came by, delivering our orders. "Okay, that's a rice omlet, a tofu salad, one coffee and one tea. Enjoy". The waitress gave us a friendly but over-used smile on her face before going to take someone else's order. "You ordered tofu salad? Isn't that childish of you?" I asked Hayashi-san. Hayashi-san gave me a puzzled look. "There's nothing wrong with that, is there? I think that we all have a childish self within us. In other words, we're all still children at heart". Hayashi-san smiled brightly. A smile as natural and cute as hers could turn a few heads. Looking around, I was proven right. A few male customers were glancing over to us, or to Hayashi-san. I turned back to face her. She was happily digging into her food. Come to think of it, Hayashi-san did have a childish side, even if she had the appearance of a young woman. Her phrases such as 'meanie' or 'coo-coo head' was proof of her child-like attitude. That and the way that she puffs out her cheeks. 

Late afternoon arrived once we left the cafe. The sky had started to turn orange as the time was moving on into the evening. "We should head back to catch the train. The next one arrives in thirty minutes". "Is there no where else that we can go?" "I'm a little short on money. I only have enough for the train back. Is that alright?" Hayashi-san shifted the loose strands of her hair back behind her ear with a smile. "Absolutely. Maybe we could watch a movie next time". "You make it sound like a date". At this, I thought that Hayashi-san would become embarrassed. Instead she just laughed. "Hahaha. Gosh, it does, doesn't it? W-well, isn't this a date?" Hayashi-san stopped walking. I stopped just a few centimetres in front. She just shook her head. "Nevermind. Forget what I said". "Sorry, too late". There was silence. Hayashi-san's face turned red once again. She seemed so comfortable before. "This can be called a date, if you want it to be". Hayashi-san's eyes sparkled with hope. "Really? This is...a date?" "....Yeah. It is". I didn't even realize how empty the street was, and the surrounding silence that followed. Hayashi-san started walking again, right next to me. If we could really call this a date, this would also be called my first date, ever. 

The train was quiet. If you wouldn't consider the morning train empty, you certainly would now. Hayashi-san rested her head against my shoulder without a word. She wasn't asleep, just relaxed. I didn't mind. The only problem would be if she actually did sleep. I would have no choice but to carry her to my apartment. I didn't have her key and I didn't know which apartment building she lived at. So it would have to be my place. Great... Luckily she didn't fall asleep. Though drowsy from the whole day, she could still stand up and walk. We turned into an isolated section of the street, the only way cutting through to my apartment building, and Hayashi-san's, I guess. The street was completely empty, aside from us. "You okay?" "Yeah, just sleepy". "It's been a long day. I'm not surprised. I'm a little tired myself". As we were about to turn the corner of the street, a small group of young men turned from that very corner and into us. By looking at them, they looked like thugs that would pick a fight with someone for no good reason. "S-sorry. Excuse me". Hayashi-san apologised to one of the men as they bumped into her. "Well, well, what do we have here, boys?" The douche-bag in the center spoke with a mocking and idiotic tone. "Looks like we have a couple of cuties out here. Goin' on a date?" His way of speaking pissed me off. I wanted to hit him, badly. "Fuck off, assholes. It's none of your business". "Well, now it is". The thug on the left then pulled out a rusted iron pipe from behind his back. I guided Hayashi-san to move behind my back. She needed more protection than I did. "Back off, now". Oh, we can't do that - no, we refuse to. Since when did you become the boss of us, pretty boy? I'll fuck that pretty face up with this pipe here. Right before we fuck your girlfriend over there". That was it. I didn't want to hold back. Hayashi-san wasn't my girlfriend, but she was still a pure young woman. And I would never let those aassholes touch her in any way. "You'll have to get through me first". "K-Kizami-san, no!" "Stay back. If you have to, run away". "Aww, how cute. It's disgusting. Let's just get this shit over with". Suddenly the guy on the right threw a punch at me. I just barely dodged it until the guy on the left threw a punch next. Due to my dodge, he narrowly missed my face and hit my shoulder instead. The guy in the middle had the pipe in hand. "Finish him off so that we can all get a turn of the lady". I began throwing punches and kicks in order to help Hayashi-san. That is until the bastards fighting me shoved me against the wall to corner me. "God dammit!" I cursed, trying to fight back with all of my strength. "Hayashi-san, run!". 

Hayashi-san backed away from the last guy. Unfortunately, as she tried to run the sick bastard grabbed her by the hair. She shrieked as she was slammed against the wall in front of me. "Hey, hey, calm down girlie. I'll be gentle, at first". I couldn't do anything while Hayashi-san was in that state. Soon, one of the men threw a hard punch to my face, putting me off balance as the other kicked my leg. I heard the sound of a swift tearing of fabric and another shriek of fear. Hayashi-san...no. "Yuuya, noooo!" Yuuya? Since when did Hayashi-san call me by my first name. I couldn't think straight. All I was capable of doing was trying to stand up and fight. I managed to kick one to the ground, only to be kneed in the gut. I thought that it would be all over until...I heard Hayashi-san's voice. "N-no...stop. Get...away...". "Hmm? What's that, sweetheart?" "Get...away...! Get away from YUUYA!" Suddenly the moments of pain in my body shattered. There was a male cry, and then a harsh thud. Red...a crimson red splattered on the wall. There was another thud and whimpering. The two men stopped fighting me. My vision became clear. Hayashi-san stood before us with a crazed look in her eyes and blood on her clothes. What the...? The man who attacked her before was on the ground, petrified. Hayashi-san stood before him with his precious weapon in her hand, also splattered with blood. His blood. It was so...beautiful. "Don't touch him...". She spoke in a cold tone of voice. "I'll hurt anyone that hurts Yuuya. I'll...I'll kill you...I'll kill you!" Hayashi-san screamed her very thoughts at the thugs before raising the pipe again, and bringing it down on their leaders leg. He screamed in pain. "Gaaah! This bitch is crazy! Someone kill her already!" I wasted no time. I grabbed one of the men and began hitting him as hard as I could against the wall. Hayashi-san held the pipe in her hands, swinging it into the other guys side like a baseball bat and ball. She swung the weapon down on him like she was bringing down hell itself. I had never seen that before. Her pupils were the size of pinpricks and her face pale from shock. All of the guys were down so why was she still hitting them angrily? "Hayashi-san, that's enough". She ignored me. I approached her, hooking my arms under hers to trap her. "I said, that's enough!" She finally stopped, panting heavily. None of them seemed to be dead so this could have been classed as self defense, if Hayashi-san wasn't so violent. 

I let her go steadily. She visibly shook from head to toe. "Are you alright?" I asked, placing my hand on her shoulder. "I'm fine but...you're not". "Huh...?" Hayashi-san quickly turned around, immediately wrapping her arms around me. "Please don't do that again! I was so scared that they would put you in hospital!" Her sobs were muffled by my chest. I sighed, holding her in my arms without any way to go about it. When I did, she quietened down. "Believe me, you were worse off. I'm just...glad that you're okay". I couldn't really explain what happened earlier. It would have to come up another time. Hayashi-san pulled back. When she averted her gaze, her eyes widened with horror. "N-no...". She rushed over to a spot near the wall and crouched down. I followed, crouching beside her. "What is it?" Her eyes saddened. '"Th-the necklace you bought for me...That piece of crap ripped it off. This was...a gift from you and he...". Only then did I notice the obvious tear in her chest region. The top of her bra and...breasts...were exposed. "Uh, h-here. Wear this". I removed my new jacket, covering Hayashi-san's torso with it. "And, let me get this". I picked up her necklace. "I'm not positive about being able to fix it, but I'm sure I can figure something out". Hayashi-san smiled. "Thank you, once again". I stood, offering my hand to her. "Let's go. We can head to my place to clean up". Hayashi-san took my hand, standing up herself. "Wait, can't we go to my apartment? I need a change of clothes, anyway". "Well, alright". "Can you...bring your school uniform?" I arched my eyebrow, confused. "Y-you'll see later, okay? Um, let's go. Quickly". Hayashi-san kept a tight hold of my hand, leading me back into the street. What was she thinking now?


	6. Brilliant Red Demon

Only a few minutes after stopping by my place for a few things, I was eventually in Hayashi-san's apartment building. The reason that she asked me to pick up things like my school uniform is because she was scared to be left alone that night. Since it was Monday the next day, we had school. Things would be a lot easier if I had my uniform and bag with me. Hayashi-san unlocked her apartment door and lead me inside. Her apartment really was a little bigger than mine. Although the interior was still japanese, she owned a few western-styled pieces of furniture. "Please, make yourself at home. I just have to...clean up and change my clothes. Excuse me". Hayashi-san removed my jacket, revealing her bloodstained clothes. I wondered how long it would be before those guys were found.

Hayashi-san left for, what I assumed to be, the bathroom. I sat down on the sofa patiently. Everything in the room was neat and well kept. In a small section of the room, by a big window, stood a music sheet stand. Next to that was a small dresser with an instrument case on top. So she was a musician? By the shape of the case, I would guess that she played the violin. There was more. Leaning on the walk-in closet was a wooden sword. It was the kind that someone would see in a dojo. Just how many talents did she have? It would explain how she could easily wield that pipe from earlier. 

Hayashi-san quickly returned with an ice pack in hand. She wasn't changed and still bloody. "I almost forgot, silly me. Here, keep this on that nasty bruise near your eye. It should help". I did as I was told, taking the ice pack and holding it against the painful spot on my face. "Thank you, Hayashi-san". "That's alright. I'll do anything to help. How's your stomach?" "It's okay. I'll live". Hayashi-san seemed to think for a moment. "Well, okay. I will be right back". What was that all about?

It was only minutes after she left that Hayashi-san returned, wearing a t-shirt that was too big for her and a simple pair of shorts. "Alright. Much better. Now I can take a look at your injuries". Hayashi-san approached me. She then sat down beside me, close enough so that I could smell her perfect scent. "Please move your hand". She guided my hand away from my face, the one that held the ice pack. Hayashi-san brushed her thumb across the bruise. I winced. "Oh, s-sorry. Did that hurt?". "N-no. It's fine". Our faces were so close. So close that I could feel her warm breath on my face. She smiled. "You're still beautiful, bruised or not". "Haha, thanks". There was a moments pause. I stared into Hayashi-san's eyes, as she did mine. A strange and foreign feeling washed over me. Well, it was more like a sudden urge. 

I wasn't the one to take the lead. I wasn't even going to attempt anything. Hayashi-san moved on her own. She leaned her face in. I could have backed away. "W-wait, Hayashi-san...". "Akane...". She said, our noses practically touching. "Please...Call me Akane". I hesitated. We hardly knew eachother yet she already wanted to have a first name bases. I once again found myself staring into her eyes. All logic caved in at this point. Kurosaki was right. I am still a man. "A-Akane...". I stole the lead, leaning in, closing my eyes and pressing my lips to hers. There was no resistance or hesitation. Only tension. My first kiss...It now belonged to her, Akane. By her sense of nervousness, it seemed that I stole her first kiss, too. Akane's hands rested on my lap, grabbing onto the fabric. I kept my hands at her face, keeping them place on her soft, rosy cheeks. The kiss only lasted for a few seconds that felt like hours. I pulled away, the soft, wet sound of our lips parting filled the silence of the room. I moved my hands down to her shoulders. She was shaking, her face red. "Y-Yuuya...". She appeared lost for words. I was, too. "That was...uh...". I had no clue what to say. What could I say? Akane just smiled, caressing my cheek. "We don't have to say anything right now. That was...perfect. Just as I imagined". She had thought about this before? Akane liked me. Anyone could see that within one hundred miles, whenever she blushed or tripped over her words around me. And I couldn't stop myself from thinking about just how cute she was when she did. Of course I would be somewhat uncomfortable. Other than that, I would just stare at her face as she would avert her eyes away from mine and fidget. Right now, she was calm and dazed like she was in a dream come true. "Akane, would you...like to kiss again?" My words sounded unfamiliar and unusual, coming from someone like me. However, I wanted to say them aloud, alone with Akane and no one else to stop and stare. I could let my guard down around her. I placed a hand on her cheek once more as she did for me. Closing my eyes and once again plunging the room into darkness, I leaned in one last time. Our lips met softly. We didn't delve deeper into the kiss. That was not necessary. Neither of us made a move to go further. Neither of us had to. 

In the later hours of the evening, Akane allowed me to use her shower before going to bed. And how strange it was that Akane had a single bed and no spare futon. I offered to sleep on the couch - but she refused. "It's alright. Just because we're a man and a woman doesn't mean that we can't share a bed, ya' big goof". Akane slid into her bed, patting the space next to her. "It should be just like a sleepover". I sighed in defeat. Reluctantly I slid into bed next to her. There wasn't a big space between us. Even in the darkness I could see a blush on Akane's face. "See? You're embarrassed". "No I'm not...It's just...nice and warm here". Akane moved in closer until our bodies touched. I could feel something soft against my elbow, like a cushion. "Nn...". Akane moaned softly next to me. Her head rested on my chest. I tried to move my arm but it was already underneath her side. The soft cushion was now pressed against my ribcage. So soft...My face warmed up. I had to stay composed at all costs. Even if Akane's chest was pressed against me, even if my thigh was trapped inbetween her legs and up against something warm and...Just what on earth was I thinking about? This wasn't being composed at all! "Hey, Yuuya?" "Yes, Akane?" I spoke calmly. Akane didn't look up at me. 

She continued to speak, her voice drowsy and quiet, almost like a whisper. "I have a secret to tell you". "Um, okay, let's hear it". I awaited Akane's response. Her body relaxed against mine. "Do you know what my name means? The characters in my name mean Brilliant Red Forest". Why was she telling me this? I already grasped basic kanji in elementary school. Akane Hayashi meant exactly that, it was no secret. However, I remained silent as she continued. "But, long ago, my ancestors family name was Akuma, which means demon. So, if you think about it, my ancestral name is Akane Akuma. In other words, Brilliant Red Demon". I wasn't sure what to think. Why would she tell me that? For what purpose? Akane's head felt heavy against my chest. She had drifted off. When she puts it like that, she makes it sound like she's really a demon in a young womans body. This means that I have spoken to a demon, held hands with a demon and...kissed a demon. No, Akane is still a girl inside and out. However, if she had a reason to tell me that then there must be a demon within her somewhere. My guess is, after seeing that look in her eyes today and the crimson red blood splattered by her hand, the demon within her is not in appearance or heart...but in the mind. Heh...sounds very familiar...


	7. Misunderstanding and Jealousy Is Human Nature

I groaned as I was just beginning to return to the waking world. I wasn't sure exactly when I fell asleep the previous night. Last night...I kissed Akane for the first time. While we're on the subject of Akane, I also began using her first name since she had already started to use mine. The physical feeling I had was warm, heavy and...soft? The fragrance that filled my nose was sweet vannila. The sound that filled my ears was a soft breathing. I looked down to see Akane still leaning on my chest. My arm held her closely, protectively and unintentionally. She moaned softly, shifting her body slightly. Her head lifted from my chest. "Mn...Yuuya?" Her body turned until we were face-to-face. But she didn't stop there. Rubbing her eyes, yawning, she sat herself up in a half-asleep state. Her knees were positioned on either side of my waist while she towered over my lying down form. "Haah, good morning, sleepy-boopy". "What the hell does that mean?" I asked casually as if we weren't in this position at the moment. "Hm? What was that, Yuuya?" "Uh, nothing. Are you planning on getting up any time soon?" "Mm-hm...". Akane remained still. Was she always like this in the morning? "Er, A-Akane...?" She giggled, leaning down. "Not until I get a good morning kiss". "Wha-?! Akane, do-hmph!" I was silenced by Akane's soft lips. I wasn't prepared for it at all so I found myself already short of breath. I quickly turned my head to the side, gasping and panting. "Aww, no fair...". Akane frowned like a child. Her eyes were half lidded, as if she would fall asleep again at any moment. 

Akane sat up again and rubbed her eyes. "Mnn...Well, I guess I'll go start breakfast". Akane clumsily got up like someone that was tipsy. Her bare feet tapped against the hardwood floor as she made her way out and into the main room. I wiped her kiss away with the back of my hand. If she really was like this every morning, how did she manage to stay on her feet and not injure herself every morning? I sat up. Last night, the room was dark so I couldn't see the contents of her bedroom very well. It looked like a normal room for a teenage girl. Walls that were painted a dark red, nice furniture, a desk and laptop, artistic posters on the walls and pink bedding. Most of her decoration choices were mature, to say the least. The only exception was a small crowd of plushies in the corner of the room. The one thing that stood out the most for me, however, was the walk-in closet. Attached to the handles was an old-fashioned lock that would require a key. It looked quite old and worn, but usable nonetheless. What could she have that needed to be kept under lock and key? I guessed that I would never find out. Asking her would most certainly be pointless. If I had something specific locked up I wouldn't tell anyone, even if they asked. My uniform and bag were neatly set on Akane's desk. I decided to get up and change before checking that Akane hadn't started a fire.

I threw my school blazor over my shoulder upon entering the kitchen. I had washed my face and got changed. Akane was still in her clothes from last night while preparing breakfast. She looked like she was doing okay so far. "Akane, are you fully awake yet?" "Hmm? Yeah, I'm okay...". The sound of her sleepy voice failed to convince me. I entered the kitchen area. "I used your bathroom to wash my face. I hope that's okay". "Mm-hm. Of course. If it's Yuuya, I don't mind at all". I felt like I was slowly and gradually receiving a love confession from this girl. "Here, Akane, let me take care of that while you get ready". "Are you sure?" I nodded. "Okay, then. Thank you. It'll take two seconds". I sighed in relief as she left for the bathroom. If I left her in charge it could have ended badly.

Akane did manage to wake up after washing the sleep from her eyes. She walked to school with me, acting like her normal self. Whatever that was. We just about made it to class when the bell rang. Upon entering class, several heads turned our way. A few were people who I recognized all too well. I could hear whispering among them. "...Is that Yuuya Kizami and the new girl? What's her name?" "Akane Hayashi. How the hell do you forget a pretty face like hers?" "...Did you see them walk in class together? Are they...like that?" "...No, it can't be. Yuuya-kun is-" "Oh, yeah. I forgot about your little attraction". "A-aya-chan! Sshh!" I could hear different conversations from the odd group of both boys and girls. But they were all talking about the same thing. Me and Akane being together. How annoying. I sat at my desk once class had finally begun. The homeroom teacher walked in, telling everyone to get in their seats and to settle down, as per usual. Every now and then I caught a glimpse of people looking over in my direction. Ugh...They were all completely misunderstanding the situation. Just because a male and female student arrive at school together doesn't mean a thing. We just happen to be living in the same neighbourhood. We just happen to be in the same class. We also just happen to have stayed together and sleep in the same bed the other night. It means nothing. 

During break, I headed to the student council room. Everyone who I was familiar with usually went to that room since two of them were appointed as members, one being the president of the student council. Upon entering, all eyes were on me. All except for Kirisaki's. " There he is, the dog". "What are you talking about?" I asked casually, sitting at one of the desks. " Come on, we know about your little rendezvous with Hayashi-chan. Did you two play a game of nyan nyan afterwards?" How did they know about that? "Um, Kizami-san," Urabe spoke up. "Tohko said that she saw you both exit an apartment building this morning. And we both saw you earlier, in town, holding hands". They were completely misunderstanding, Kirisaki especially. I knew that she liked me, so of course she would take it the wrong way. I decided to calmly put her mind at ease...with a white lie. "The reason why we were in town together is because she was born in the countryside so she isn't familiar with the city. I was showing her around. The reason that I held her hand is because the city was busy and I didn't want her to get lost". "And what about this morning?" What was this, an interrogation? "Aka-...Hayashi-san is a drowsy person when she wakes up. She told me this a short while ago, so I offered to help out and visit her apartment in the morning. Just to help her out, since I live close by and am her...friend". At that, Katayama and Ohkawa bowed. " Tomohiro, we have found a god!" "Yes we have. All hail Kizami-senpai!" "Will you otaku idiots shut up?! This loner bastard, a god?! Bullshit!" Shimada stood up from his chair and yelled. Oh, great, the toddler was having a tantrum. "How can this asshole be a god when he doesn't have a girlfriend?! I have ten!" "Can't see why". Kirisaki mumbled under her breath. Shimada disregarded her comment. "Just you wait! Soon I'll have Akane-chan in my arms as my girlfriend. And she'll definitely have fun with me, a real man!" He was definitely barking up the wrong tree. Akane wasn't like that. She seemed totally devoted towards staying close to me and no one else. Shimada had no chance, but I wasn't going to tell him that. 

After school I met up with Akane at the front gates. She smiled upon seeing me. It was kind of nice to see her, too. I wouldn't bring myself to saying that out loud and to her face. "Hey," I greeted her. "H-hello, Yuuya". I crooked my eyebrow. "What's wrong?" "It's nothing. I just got really excited when I saw you coming to meet me. Silly me". "Well, whatever. Let's go". "Roger dodger!" Akane gave a childish salute. You are in highschool. Have some self respect. I rolled my eyes, trying to hide a smile. A few blocks on the way to the train station, the streets had emptied. It was just me and Akane. "Hey, Yuuya, do you wanna hold hands?" Akane held out her hand as we walked. I averted my gaze from her waiting hand. "Why...?" "Isn't it nice to hold hands with someone you like?" I looked to Akane's hand again. I didn't hate or dislike Akane. Did I in fact, like her? My mind was becoming messed up, that was for sure. "Alright, then". I took hold of Akane's waiting hand, bringing her closer towards me. She looked triumphant, swinging our arms back and forth in a slow rhythm like we were a lovely-dovey couple. "It's funny," "What is?" I asked. "This. I wanted to try and see you as a big brother to calm myself down - but I can't. My heart is racing like crazy". Big brother? "Do you have a big brother?" Akane shook her head. "No. But I do have a big sister. She's a pain in the butt". "I know how that feels". "You have a big sister, too?" "And a big brother". Akane sucked in through her teeth. "Ouch...I'm sorry". "It's okay. You and I don't live with our siblings anymore so it's okay". "I guess so".

"I've always wanted a little sister". I confessed that to Akane in trust. For as long as I can remember, having a little sister has been something that I have always wanted. Someone smaller and weaker than I. A cute being that would trust me and love me no matter what. "Is that so? I've always wanted a little brother. A cute, smart and innocent little brother that will look up to me and love me". These coincidences were becoming ridiculous. Akane looked into my eyes with a smirk. "I could think of something better than a little brother and sister". Akane stopped walking, as did I. Our hands were still connected. Akane came closer to me. "What do you mean?" I asked, honestly not wanting to find out the answer. Akane caressed my cheek with her free hand, softly. Our faces were so close. "Well, I'll give you a clue...Tiny hands and feet, cute little faces," Akane's face came closer still until the tips of our noses met. ", a twin bassinet in the corner of the bedroom. Can you guess?" I had a pretty good idea. I wanted to pull away from Akane's lips nearing towards mine. It wasn't futile. I could have just pulled away myself. But something bet me to it. "Yuuya...?" Akane froze, turning her head as I did towards the voice that called my name nervously. "K-Kirisaki...?" There she was, standing in front of us, her face pale and her lip trembling. "I...I thought you said that...". "Listen, Kirisaki, please don't misunderstand. We're just friends". "Then, why are you holding hands and...?" "Why do you care?" Akane spoke up in a stern tone. "You may be Yuuya's friend, but you're not his girlfriend. So why do you care if we're holding hands? Besides, friends can do this too. Yuuya is like a big brother to me, since I've never had one". What was she doing now? "B-but...!" "If you have something to say to Yuuya, then just say it". "...". Kirisaki was quiet. In fact, she was completely silent. Instead of saying anything, she walked on past us. "Hm...You got lucky". Akane muttered under her breath with a serious expression. Her head quickly turned to me with an innocent smile. "Shall we go, Yuu-ya?" 

Akane asked me if she could hang out in my apartment. I agreed without caring. I didn't mind having her company. When we arrived, I immediately went for the fridge to get a cold drink. "Make yourself at home. Would you like a drink?" I asked, dumping my blazor on the kitchen counter. "No, thank you. I'm okay. Just...a little irritated". I watched Akane as she pulled something out from the back of her skirt. I froze in place as I saw her pull out a twelve inch dagger from her skirt. She placed the weapon down on the counter beside her as if it meant nothing. I wasn't in a panic. In fact, I was curious. I leaned against the wall with my drink in hand. "Um, this is the part where you explain the knife". "I really don't think there's a need to explain. I had it with me during classes and when we went home". "Were you planning to use it?" Akane wore an innocent face. "Maybe...Maybe not. But, don't worry. I would never hurt you, Yuuya. Ever". "You were thinking about using it on Kirisaki, weren't you?" Akane wasn't suprised or fearful. She continued to wear a smile and play with her hair. "I know that she likes you. I know that you don't like her back, so...". She was jealous. They both were, of eachother. The only difference is that I've become closer to Akane in a short amount of time. Because of that, Akane would take drastic measures to keep that. If Kirisaki tried to get closer to me, it would only end badly. Really badly. Akane walked by me, leaving the dagger behind on my counter. 

I couldn't let Akane harm Kirisaki out of jealously. That would raise a lot of questions since I'm the source of it all. My goal is to observe humans in order to keep myself locked away. My true self. If I become the center of attention because of something like...I couldn't let that happen. "Excuse me, Akane". I followed her. She swiftly turned around. I didn't allow her to say a word. I held the nape of her neck gently, pressing my lips to hers. It was strange how it would come to kissing her. But that wasn't all. I pulled away and opened my eyes to see Akane's face flustered bright red. "Y-Yuuya...?" "Akane, we have to talk seriously for a moment. For now, I'm going to cut it down to short". This was the best course of action. "Akane...". If I put Akane's mind at ease then things could go smoothly. Kirisaki and any other girl that are fond of me won't get hurt, and I can stay in the shadows. This was what I had to do. "Y-Yuuya, please say something. What's wrong?" I took in a deep breath. "Akane...". I repeated. 

"Will you be my girlfriend...?"


	8. Secrets and Promises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally updated! This story and the future chapters have been on my mind for a while. I would say that I have some decent ideas, which I hope, to you guys, that they are actually decent. Things shouldn't move too slowly anymore so the plot can now progress. Anyway, I'm gonna go write this. I'm gonna write this damn well. Okay!

Akane was frozen in place as I held her by the shoulders. Her eyes were on me, and only me for about two minutes. She wasn't responding. I had asked here to be my girlfriend. Was it that much of a suprise for her? "A-Akane, wake up. Hello? Earth to Akane". Akane opened her mouth slightly, her lip trembling until she gulped nervously. Akane's eyes travelled down as she blushed crimson. "Am I...dreaming? Is this really real?" She was speaking as if she had just experienced an epiphany. This isn't a philosophy novel, you know. "Hey, snap out of it. This is real. Akane, I want you to be my girlfriend". She raised her head quickly to look up at me. "You mean it? I...There's no way I could refuse. It's you, afterall, Yuuya". "Akane, I have to ask about that. You say that like you have liked me for a long time. Why me? What's so special about me?" Akane smiled softly. She shook her head softly, also. "It's a secret. Sorry...". Before I asked her if we had ever met. Akane said no. Was that a lie? "I'll tell you soon enough. I promise". Was there any use asking until that moment came? I let go of her shoulders.

Scratching the nape of my neck, I changed the subject. "Before you do become my girlfriend, I have to talk to you about certain things. We have to get to know eachother better. I know that it doesn't sound very romantic, but it's the only way I can say it without sounding like a sap". Akane giggled at my comment. "Hehe...I like your way. You're very honest". "Okay, then. Let's start off with simple things". Akane and I sat down on the floor, in front of one another. If we really were going to be lovers, it would be best to know what kind of person that the other was. "Okay, I'll go first. Uh, let's see...I live alone in this apartment and work two part - time jobs. I like silver accessories, I dislike my family. Uhh, My hobby is to observe humans". Akane was weird enough to listen about my hobby without standing up and leaving. She is the first person to know. "Really? Tell me more about your hobby". Akane was strangely fascinated. "Okay...Well, I observe students and teachers from school, mostly. Learning about the way they act and treat eachother teaches me a lot about human activity and socialising. It's how I can keep a cool head around people that I dislike, such as Shimada". Akane brought her knees up to her chest, crossing her arms over them. "Go on. I'm listening". By her smile and eyes, it was suprising to see that Akane was really interested to listen. Anyone else would be shocked to hear about my true self. Not Akane. "I think that I've said enough for now". "Aww, I wanted to hear more. Okay, then. We're coming back to you after I finished. Ahem, well, I also live alone in the apartment building down the street. I love plushies and I lo-...I-I mean, I really like Yuuya, heh...". She was just about to say love, wasn't she?! "I dislike rich snobs and I absolutely hate anyone that hurts Yuuya". Was her most powerful preferences just about me?! "My hobby is...Heh, I wonder if I should say it? I can trust you to keep it a secret, can't I, Yuuya?" "Um, yeah. Of course. What is it?" Akane moved her legs out a little. I glanced down for a millisecond, and then looked straight back up. I forgot that she was wearing a skirt..."My hobby is...to devote myself completely to Yuuya, and no one else. It used to be playing the violin - but then I met you...my sweet Yuuya". Akane moved down on her hands and knees. She crawled towards me like a cat, stalking it's prey. I couldn't back away since the katsu was right behind me. I thought that she was going to pounce on top of me. But, instead, she wrapped her arms around my neck for a hug. She was muttering something that I could barely hear, even though she was right by my ear. "Akane...?" "I...I finally have you...". Finally? So we had met before. But, where and when? I had a strong suspicion that Akane wouldn't tell me until the right moment came along. Akane pulled away slightly so that our faces were so close to eachother. 

"Yuuya, can you...kiss me again?" "Yeah...Yeah, sure". Akane closed her eyes and leaned into me. If a kiss is what she wanted...Akane seemed like the type of girl who would do anything to keep the one that she's fallen for by her side, and her side only. What are they called? 

Ah, whatever. I could ask Kurosaki later. He would know the proper term. I realise that such a person is bad news, I just couldn't remember the name. Akane's lips touched mine. Another soft and friend-like kiss. Although, these kisses weren't mere pecks that you get from a friend. They were a bit longer, but no deeper than just the connection between lips. That was all. I had no intention of moving this too quickly. I pulled away from the kiss. Akane let out a sigh with a happy smile. "How was that?" I asked. "Perfect...". Akane was living her fantasy world in reality. Having me as a boyfriend was obviously that fantasy world. "Akane, there's something that I need to know. Since I'm with you now, you trust that I won't go near other girls? I really won't. I have no interest in-". "I-I know. I trust you, of course. I just don't trust other girls". Akane said that with a scowl. "Don't worry about it. Let me tell you a secret of my own. To other men, this would be a humiliating thing to say. With you, that doesn't matter. You, Akane, are the only girl who I have kissed, period". Akane's expression lit up. "Re-really? When I first saw you, I would have assumed that you had kissed another woman before because you're so gorgeous". "No, Akane. I have zero experience because any other girl would bore me. Getting to know you has been interesting. I do like you, Akane. I'll admit that. Don't worry about other girls. I don't care about them". "Yuuya...I...I'm so happy. I...I knew that you were the one. There's absolutely no doubt in my mind". Akane presented a relieved smile and hopeful eyes. She looked cute. "Alright, Akane. That's that, then. I'm your boyfriend now and...". "I'm your girlfriend". Akane finished my sentence. I wasn't sure if this was how relationships start, but I highly doubted it. My microscopic heart is also my virgin heart. Fantastic... 

Akane and I spoke more about ourselves. I told her about my parents and siblings. About how my parents abandoned their love for me a long time ago and simply shunned me for nine years. That was all for now, however. "Hah, I guess we're not totally similar". "How so?" Akane was now right beside me, speaking softly. "My parents were...stuck up, shallow and generally miserable people. They focused all of their attention on me after my big sister graduated from private school. I was different from my sister, because of that I had to stay at home to learn everything that she was learning". "How were you different?" Akane smiled. "Not today, sorry". When would she tell me anything? "Anyway, my sister hid her true self behind the top grades and popularity with professors of both private schools and universities". Akane took a deep breath, staring down at the floor."She, uh...She teased me, a lot. She would gloat about how she had sex with plenty of guys, without my parents knowing. I once threatened to tell them, and she...She grabbed my arm tightly and dragged me into the bathroom. My sister cut my hair unevenly with scissors while I screamed for help. I obviously got into trouble for it and was locked in my room until my mother would come in to beat me". I never thought that such strict and dense parents still existed in the 21st century. Akane looked like she was on the verge of tears. I awkwardly wrapped my arm around her, allowing Akane to lean her head against my shoulder. She sniffled in an attempt to hold back her tears. "So, I moved out when I turned seventeen. I moved here, moved to Byakuden, and met you". Akane wrapped her arms around my torso to return the hold. "I have never been happier - I mean it". It all sounded like a Cinderella story. Did that make me Akane's prince? I didn't want to put it that way. I'm no prince charming, that's for sure. "You okay?" I asked Akane in comfort. "I'm fine. Thank you, Yuuya". 

With instinct, I raised Akane's chin until our eyes met. I closed mine to meet her in a kiss. It was a quick kiss, again just for comforting her. "How many times do you plan to kiss me?" "I want to practice a little. Am I good so far?" Akane laughed. "Hahaha...Yes, it's very good. I love your kisses. They taste sweet". This was how a boyfriend should act, I guess. Other than the 'cheering Akane up' part, I could definitely act like myself in front of Akane. "It's getting late. Want me to walk you home?" "Yes, please". I stood up, taking Akane's hand to help her to her feet. "Lead the way". I said, still holding her hand, albeit lightly. I wasn't planning on having a girlfriend in my life. Especially not during highschool. But if I wanted to keep Akane tame of her jealousy, I had to stay by her side like this in case she got the idea that someone would steal me away, or something. I could determine how things would go the next day. 

While walking the streets in the dark, I looked towards the alleyway in which those three thugs attacked us. Two police officers were standing by the alley, talking. They both spotted us. "Um, excuse us, you two". We had no choice but to stop. They found the bodies...I stayed calm and answered them, no longer holding Akane's hand. "Yes, officers?" "We need to know if you have seen these men". Seen? One of the officers held out three photos that appeared to be meant for licences or passports. It was them. "They went missing a short while ago, and investigators are currently looking for them. They are not residents in this particular street, however they were seen last heading this way by a young woman who lives about a block away. Have you seen them come here before?" What happened to the bodies? They were left there, still breathing, still alive. "No, officers. We haven't seen a thing". Akane answered with a straight face. Maybe she...Wait, if she did, how? And where are they now? I was with Akane last night, when it happened. How could she do that? "Well, thank you for your time, anyway. Call the police if you find anything or see them. Good evening". The offficers left me and Akane to continue on to her building. "What a pain". She said with a smile. "Oh, well, we won't be questioned anymore, I guess". Akane spoke of it like she was talking about the weather. Heh, what a sly criminal. I would do the same. I smiled, too. Any other man would probably be scared. Not me. Strange..."Well, good-bye, Yuuya. I'll see you tomorrow". "Right. Take care". Akane kissed my cheek before leaving for her apartment. I sighed, beginning to walk back to my own apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was all I could do for now. I'm a bit tired today so my writing might not be at its best as I want  
> it to be. Well, this is it. Nothing else until tomorrow, maybe. Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed. Bye.


	9. Evil Is Just a Word

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't have anything to say except, I just woke up and I'm going to write this because, why not?

I couldn't stop thinking about it. The moment continued to play in my head as if I was trying to solve a riddle. I couldn't figure it out without coming to one conclusion. About three nights ago, Akane and I were questioned by two police officers while I was walking Akane home. They asked about the three thugs that attacked us. Of course, they didn't know about the attack, just that they had gone missing. Akane acted as if it didn't happen. That makes her the only suspect for hiding, and possibly killing, those guys. Akane didn't appear the type to do such a thing. She was softly spoken, level-headed and sweet. Although, I can't say anything about outward appearances and what's truely on the inside. I have more awareness of that than anyone. 

I sat at my desk, pondering these things when I heard the scraping of Akane's chair as she stood from it. She walked over to Kirisaki's desk with a smile and a balled up fist. What was she doing now? Kirisaki was startled when her eyes met Akane's. I was about to stand up and do something when Akane held something out to her. I could hear Akane speak to Kirisaki. "Here, Tohko-chan. This is for you. I want to apologise for last time. I was rude. So, I wanted to give you this. In western cultures, a rabbit foot is considered a good luck charm. It's yours". Kirisaki was speechless, but accepted the gift. "I hope we can be friends from now on". "Th-thank you, Akane-chan. This so generous. Um, is it...?" "Don't worry. It's not a real rabbits foot. I bought it a long time ago while I was in Europe on vacation. It was supposed to be a gift, I just didn't have anyone to give it to". Kirisaki smiled, petting her thumb along the artificial fur. Akane left from the desk to return to her own. Just what was she up to? 

Gym class was first period. Everyone in class had changed and gone out into the yard for stretching exercises. Kurosaki was my partner so I used the opportunity to ask him a question that had been on my mind. "They're called Yandere". He answered. "Yandere...?" "Yeah. They're a very interesting character type in stuff like anime, manga and dating sims. They appear sweet and innocent at first, until they find their special someone". That sounded like Akane, alright. "Why would someone find an interest in such a character? If their actions prove to be brutal and violent, then why do people like them?" I asked while hoisting Kurosaki's back against my back, our arms linked. "It's true that Yandere have a dark and twisted side that people in the real world would want to avoid. However, it might be the whole devotion and loving part that people are so attracted to. The fact that a Yandere would be capable of killing just to be with their love interest". Killing for the sake of love? That sounds so ridiculous that it's not even funny. "Did you ever see Stephen King's Misery?" "I read a translated version of the book, why?" "Well, Kizami, a Yandere is sort of like an Annie Wilkes except hotter". That is a typical way of putting it. "But, you know me, Kizami. I love personality. My type is more the Tsundere". "Are you a masochist? Is that why you like Yamamoto so much?" "What are you guys saying about me?!" We could hear Yamamoto's voice from the other end of the yard. Kurosaki got down from our position and slapped my shoulder as a warning. "Ssh, dude. I don't want her to find out yet". "Are you ever going to tell her?" "Y-yeah. I'm just waiting for the right time. It wasn't that long ago when she dumped her good-for-nothing, asshole, cheater boyfriend". That's right, Kurosaki was pretty mad about that too. "Kurosaki, you'll be good for her. I know that you would treat Yamamoto with respect". "Wow...Th-thanks, Kizami. I don't know what to say...Uh...". "You don't have to say anything. Just have some confidence". 

Kurosaki and I took a break on the side-lines to talk more. He gulped down his bottle of water, tired and hot from the summer heat. "Right...Uh, anyway, how are things between you and Hayashi-san?" He said that like he knew that we were going out. "If I tell you, you have to keep it a secret". "Sure thing. Absolutely". I took a deep breath. "I, uh, I'm going out with Akane". "Woah! Seriously?!" "Is that so hard to believe?" "Wow, holy crap...Well, she's a lucky girl and you are a lucky guy". Am I? If I really am dating a Yandere, does that make me a lucky guy? "I hope that it goes well for you. Hayashi-san is a sweet girl...with nice looking breasts". "Will you stop mentioning her breasts?" "Pfft, s-sorry. I couldn't help it. Seriously, she seems really nice. I know that you'll be a gentleman. The only guy in our year that doesn't look at porn". "Is that a bad thing?" "No, no. Not at all". Even as Kurosaki said that, he smirked. I let out a sigh with a smile. Having a friend like Kurosaki wasn't so bad. Although I didn't do it out loud, he made me laugh. "Let me guess, you don't touch yourself either". "Not really". "Damn...I'm not really into guys buuut...I could change my mind for ¥500 an hour". Kurosaki laughed at his own statement. "Haha, shut up". "Hey, I made you laugh. I'm glad that I could". I rolled my eyes, ruffling Kurosaki's hair playfully. "H-hey! Cut it out! Haha, Kizami!" Kurosaki was a good friend, I suppose. I couldn't really deny that. 

After school, Kurosaki and I met with Akane at the front gate. She waved to us with a smile. "Hi, Yuuya. Hey, Kurosaki-kun". "Hi, Hayashi-san. Just call me Kurosaki. Any friend of Kizami is a friend of mine". "In that case, you can call me Hayashi". They were getting along already? Well this was Kurosaki, the social butterfly and...Akane. "Great. Um, I live close to Kizami so I usually walk with him. The reason why I couldn't last time was because I had club. I'm glad to finally meet you, Hayashi-san". "It's a pleasure. So, what club do you go to?" "Baseball. It's a passion of mine". They got to know eachother better while walking. I didn't mind being left out of it. Kurosaki had a great personality. That's why I can't understand why he hasn't got a girlfriend of his own. Although, Kurosaki does seem like the type that you're friends with, and also the type that would get easily embarrassed around a girl that he likes. If you think about it, he's fit to be the submissive in a relationship. That's nothing against him. It suits him in a good way, somehow. "Hey, Kizami, you haven't said a word. Come join the conversation". There he goes, being considerate again. "Sorry. I was daydreaming. What were you talking about?" "Nothing really. It was about eachother, stuff that you should already know". "I see. Since we've known eachother since we were children, I can read you like a book, Kurosaki". "That's true. Kizami is smart and very observant. He really listens to you and can keep a secret. I'm lucky to have such a great friend. I mean it, Kizami". Even if Kurosaki was mostly talking to Akane there, his words were...somewhat touching. "I know you do". Was all I said as we walked on to the train station. 

I waved Kurosaki goodbye once he left for his house. Surely his mother would be preparing dinner soon while his father was making his way home from work. For a moment, I fantasised it. If that was like my household. It only lasted a second, not even that, because my household was just me in a cheap apartment. That was all. I'm not trying to be negative or depressing. I'm being realistic. "Yuuya, what's the matter?" I snapped back into said reality with Akane by my side as we walked. For that second I thought that I was walking without direction. "Hm? Nothing. Nothing at all". "Are you daydreaming again? What were you thinking about?" I shook my head. "Really, don't worry about it". "...Yuuya, you...don't have to pretend to be alright. Did someone hurt you? If they did then I could hurt them back for you". I held in a chuckle. She sounded like a younger sibling offering to bully the bullies for their older sibling. How cute. "No thanks. I'm fine". Akane was concerned about me. No one else but Kurosaki and Akane could show consideration because I built a wall around myself and everyone else, even my siblings. 

"If something's wrong, you can tell me". "You say that yet you're the one who always keeps secrets". It was a joke but Akane stopped walking. I turned once the realisation hit me. Her head was lowered, her eyes staring at the ground of concrete. "Akane...?" "Do you...want to hear a secret?" "Huh...?" "Kurosaki-kun said that you can keep a secret. He understands you, too. But not all of you". What was she saying now? Akane was...implying that she understood me? The real me? "Kurosaki is a good person. He's a nice boy that's very kind to me". "Akane, what are you-?" "Yuuya...". Akane interupted, raising her head to look at me. "I need to show something to you. That way, I'll know for sure". I didn't really understand what she was talking about. What would she show to me? I thought about it for a second, then sighed. "Okay. Fine. Where is it?" "Follow me...". Akane took my hand in hers without warning. There was nothing that told me that she would pull out a knife and stab me in the back. So, what was it?

Akane lead me into an opening behind two buildings. No one was on the streets so it was probably abandoned. "Here we are". Akane announced, letting go of my hand and heading forward to a pile of old cardboard boxes. The alleyway reeked of death. I recognized the smell from experience. Blood...Entrails. It was all there, but stronger. I followed Akane to the boxes where she was crouched down. Somthing in her hand glimmered. A knife? I approached with caution. The sound of cardboard being torn rang in my ears and the putrid smell of rot filled my nose. I gagged. "Are you alright?" "Yeah...". Akane hesitated. "Do you want to leave this place? Be honest". "No. I want to see what you're hiding". Akane had no reaction to the smell. She appeared to have more experience than I did. I crouched down beside her. The box was damp at the bottom with a crimson red paint, dried up due to the course of time. Inside the box was a corpse of a rabbit. It was totally still, it's eyes white as snow. There was an aggressive stab wound in its neck and one of the feet was cut off. Wait...a rabbit foot? Oh, no..."You did this? I'm impressed". "Huh? Really?" "Absolutely. I would give you a gold star for giving Kirisaki a real rabbits foot. What was your plan, to give her rabies?" Akane smiled at my comment. "I knew you were the one. I knew that you were just like me. You're not scared or frantic. This isn't your first time seeing an animal corpse, correct?" I shook my head. "No. Usually they became that way by my hand. I have no regrets". Yes, when I was a child, I would kill animals to observe the outcome. It was inevitable that they would all die eventually. However, the final moments of their lives was what intrigued me the most. "Akane, we are the same. Now that that's cleared up I suppose that you'll be keeping less secrets from now on". "Ufufu, perhaps. I wanted to take the risk because of a hunch. Something deep down told me that you weren't the stereotypical, boring protagonist. You're evil, Yuuya. Evil like me". 

"Evil is just a word, Akane. When you think about it, everyone is evil". I said that as I stood up, my legs aching. "Humans tell lies, hurt eachother, kill one another. Everyone is evil in their own way". "I'd say that you're quite the philosopher, Yuuya". Akane closed the box, stacking another on top to seal it. She then stood by my side. "Shall we go?" "Yes, but, before we do I need to ask you a favour". "Okay. Anything for you". "Um, I need you to get that rabbit foot back from Kirisaki". Akane tilted her head to the side, acting confused. "Why? It's a good luck charm". "Then get her a fake one. If she gets sick because of it, I won't be happy. I can't have you hurting people that know me". "Is that a favour or a condition?" Huh? Did she know that that was the reason why I chose to date her? "Teehee, just kidding! I'll get it back and replace it with a fake one". "Good...Thanks". I began to walk away again, expecting Akane to follow beside me. Instead she grabbed my sleeve. I said nothing when I looked over my shoulder. "Oh, and Yuuya, if Kirisaki-san tries to touch you, I will never forgive her. Who knows? I might just make a space for her along with the other boxes. You know what I mean?" "Uh, yeah. Don't worry about it though. When the time is right, I'll make it clear to everyone that you and I are dating". "Hm, I'm glad". Akane wrapped her arms around my waist, burying her face into my back. I was planning to tell my so - called friends that we were darting. I wasn't scared of Akane's threats against Kirisaki. I know that sounds terrible but I honestly felt nothing. Even so, I couldn't let Akane do anything to Kirisaki. Surely a lot of people at school knew that she liked me. If the girl I was dating hurt Kirisaki, it would raise a lot of questions towards me. Oi didn't want that. I didn't need that. "Alright, Akane, let go of me". Akane pulled away from my back, walking beside me as we continued out of the alleyway. Akane was my girlfriend now, so I had to treat her as such. "Hey, would you, uh...Would you like to go out next Sunday?" "Really? Wow, okay! Could we exchange numbers to figure out the details?" "Sure...". "Yay! My first real date with Yuuya!" How did I know that she would be that excited? Akane wrapped her arms around my arm, making it difficult to walk. Our first date, huh? How would that go?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick note, I put in a little Kizami x Kurosaki. Sorry. Force of habit. It won't happen again...  
> Anyway, I really did just wake up when I started this chapter and it took a short while to update it. I'm glad that a few people are reading this, though it's not the best. I've read better fanfictions. This was something that was stuck in my head for a while and wouldn't shut up until I wrote it down. So, I'm gonna go. Thanks for reading. Bye.
> 
> *Falls asleep, or at least tries to*


	10. The Pin Is Mightier Than The Sword

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey. I have returned. For me, it's been a while. I can't help but be lazy. I'm here now, ready for some Kizami x OC/Yandere-chan goodness! Enjoy!

Another morning. Another school day. Another trip with Akane, wanting to hold my hand on the way. However, my guess was that she was sleeping in again. So I had to visit her apartment and wake her up, whether she was concious or not. If she was I had to avoid getting pounced on. When I called her she said that the door was open and that she would just be getting dressed. Funny how a woman could say that so casually to a man. Good thing it was me since I couldn't care less. I'm not dating Akane to be too intimate with her. I'm doing it to prevent people, mainly women, getting too close to me. As I have seen what Akane is like, I know that Akane would hurt any woman that tries to flirt or even look at me a certain way. Especially Kirisaki. She's in more danger than anyone. People didn't even have to know that I was dating Akane. Just that I was close to a girl that was 'possibly' my girlfriend. The girls at school could back-off then.

Arriving at her apartment, Akane wasn't in the main rooms. Not in the kitchen or living area. In the bathroom maybe? "Akane...?" I called out to her. "Oh, hi, Yuuya! I'll be out in a minute". I looked around the apartment. Nothing had changed. Everything was still neat and tidy. "Okay! I'm ready". Akane called out once more before coming out from her bedroom. She looked as pretty as ever. Haa...I can only admit that in my head. "Great. Hopefully we won't be late today". "We're never late, silly. We always make it". "Right. One minute before class starts". Akane rolled her eyes. "Sure, sure. Oh, I have something for you". Akane went to the kitchen counter and brought over two lunches. "See? I made two. One for me and one for you". "You didn't have to. I was planning to get something from the cafeteria. Besides, aren't people at school going to see that we both have the same side-dishes?" Akane shook her head with a smile. "Nope. I gave you different side-dishes. Your favourites. Aren't I a good girl, Yuuya?" "Yeah, I guess. Good girl". I humoured her by patting her head. I took the lunch from her hand with a thanks. "Alright, we should go so we don't miss the train". "Roger dodger". 

The train was once again crowded with everyone shoulder-to-shoulder. I stood by the doors with Akane while impatiently waiting for our stop. "Um, Yuuya? About our date on Sunday...". "Yeah, what about it?" "I was thinking, would you like to go during lunch so I can make something? We could go to the park. I know a nice, quiet spot that we could sit at". "Sure. That sounds fine". Akane smiled happily. What was she so excited for? It wasn't anything special. Although, seeing her reaction said otherwise. On her part, anyway. The second-to-last stop was reached. People got off and another flood of people got on. I was forced to have my back to the wall as someone pushed Akane in my direction. "Wah...!" She shrieked, bumping into me. "Oof! A-Akane...are you oka-ah!" I couldn't finish my sentence. Looking down, Akane was so close to me. So close that it was almost suffocating. Her eyes stared deeply into mine with a sense of being bashful. I could feel her racing heartbeat behind her soft bosom. "Yu-Yuuya...I...Your chest...". That's right! I leave some of the buttons of my shirt open! So it's my exposed chest to her thinly lined shirt! No, I couldn't show embarrassment. Geez...I shared a bed with this girl and now I'm embarrassed? I averted my eyes from her. I'm Yuuya Kizami! I have no emotions of any sort. I'm a Kuudere without the 'deredere'! "Are you okay, Akane?" "Yes. I'm okay. I'm a little shaky". Good...I managed to regain my composure. Our position, however, would have to remain until our stop. 

When our stop was reached, I was gasping for air. Being in such a tight space was truely an ordeal. Do I actually have sympathy for chlaustriphobics? I composed myself once Akane had followed me onto the station platform. "Right. I'm glad that's over. Let's hurry up. School starts in twenty minutes". "Alright. Could we hold hands on the way?" "Hm? Sure". Akane didn't hesitate when I gave her the okay. Our hands linked swiftly. Holding her hand was a nice comfort. It was so soft and warm. Her smile, too. If I ever said these things out loud I would be shaming myself. 

Class would go on as it usually did. That was the thought until a particular person decided to speak to during break. Someone who is both obnoxious and persistent. "Hey, Yuu-ya-kun!" I suddenly received a harsh slap on the back. I turned in my desk chair to see a girl next to me. Rei Fukui. A bright but awfully obnoxious girl in class 2-3. She's not in my class but every now and then stops by to slap me on the back. "What is it, Fukui-kun? Don't bother me". She sat on my desk, ignoring me. I sighed. "What do you want?" "You, my darling Yuuya-kun. I'm still waiting for your answer, y'know!" "I already gave you my answer. No, I don't want to go out with you". "Aw, c'mon. I can be a great girlfriend! Why not?" I stood from my desk. "I don't want a girlfriend, especially one like you". By now, I've completely forgotten that she has feelings. Frankly, I'm frustrated with her. "You're a meanie. Buuut, you're a sexy meanie". "The answer is and will always be no". "Yeah, right!" "Wha-...?!" Fukui-kun clung to me all of a sudden with a cat-like grin. She wasn't letting go. "Yuuya-kun, I l.o.v.e you. Don't ever forget that". She pulled away and left, giggling. 

I ran my fingers through my hair with a frustrated sigh. Glancing over for a moment, I saw it. Among the other students around the classroom, there was Akane. She stood in the middle of the room, staring in my direction. She wore an expression that could kill. Her pained frown, and dilated pupils - the size of pinpricks. Akane looked to be under a spell on anger, hate and jealousy. Jealousy towards Fukui-kun. Oh, no...I was about to go explain to her about it but the bell rang. Students either left for their next class in the second building or stayed for literature. I stayed, Akane left. I could only imagine what she would want to do. If Akane really was a Yandere, her actions would be violent and brutal towards anyone who could prove to be a rival. But she can't do anything, right? I told her before that I wasn't interested in other girls. Still, I was concerned about her jealousy issues. How far would she go? 

Lunch came around and my anxiety had remained. Akane turned up with a blank expression. I was patiently waiting for her to sit next to me. When she was close enough, I grabbed her arm and sat her down on the chair, much to her suprise. "Ow! Yu-Yuuya? What's wrong?" "Akane, did you do anything to Fukui-kun?" "Fukui-kun? That girl who was touching you with her filthy hands?" She said that so casually! "Yes, her. Did you do anything?" "Like what?" Akane was stalling. So...she did do something!? Akane wouldn't play dumb unless there was a reason! Suddenly, many feet wandered outside in the hallway, going in the same direction. And a voice...("She's choking! Someone call for an ambulance!") Everyone looked outside. I followed to the front of the crowd, leaving Akane at the desk. Outside was...Fukui-kun. She was on the floor, tears flooding from her eyes and gagging. Saliva rolled down her chin along with...blood. Just what was she choking on?! Her best friend was beside her, crying. I looked back to see Akane approaching with an emotionless face. Strangely, I felt nothing. I was suprised but more curious about how Akane did this. A small clink emitted from the floor. No one else seemed to have heard it, as everyone else was paying attention to Fukui-kun, who was being taken to the infirmary before collapsing onto the floor. Akane was behind the rest of the crowd. She crouched down by the small pool of blood, picking something up and putting it into her student ID. Her eyes wandered to me. Akane smiled, placing a finger on her lips. "Ssh...". She whispered. Akane was lucky that our school didn't invest in CCTV indoors. Maybe that's how she was able to do this. Also, no one was watching her but me. What could I say to her? Should I be mad, scared or thankful that she got rid of a nuisance? 

On the way back home, I didn't speak to Akane. I was at a loss for words. But she smiled through it, as if nothing had happened. Nothing at all. I had invited Akane over before the whole incedent happened. She would probably misunderstand if I went back on it. We entered my apartment, I said nothing still. Akane was standing at my enterance way when she was the first to speak. "Um, Yuuya, do you...Are you angry with me?" I dumped my blazor on the table and faced her. Honestly..."No, I'm not angry, exactly. I'm more disappointed. I told you that I wasn't interested in other girls, didn't I?" "It's not just about that!" Akane raised her voice slightly. "She...I saw the look on your face. That girl was annoying you, wasn't she? She was bothering you, wasn't she? I hated to see someone hurt you. And the way she put her grubby hands on you so easily...It pissed me off!" Akane's tone darkened and her eyebrows furrowed intensely. "How dare they...How dare they act so giddy around you...Yuuya...My Yuuya...You're mine...You belong to me!" Akane dropped her bag, slamming her fist on the kitchen counter with force. I gave little reaction. Her rage made my heart jump excitedly. Akane panted after coming out of her trance. I decided to slowly approach her, placing my hand on her head. "Ugh...Yu-Yuuya?" Akane looked up at me. "There, there, Akane. You don't have to worry. I won't show interest in another girl. Count on that. I'm your boyfriend, Akane. But...to be honest, at the moment I wouldn't go as far as to say that I belong to you. It a bit too much for me at the moment". Akane's expression softened as I spoke. She lowered her eyes. "B-but I...I...". "...?" Akane wrapped her arms around me, burying her face into my chest. She didn't finish her sentence so I disregarded it for the time being. "Now, tell me," I began, receiving Akane's attention once more. "Do you mind explaining how you almost killed a classmate? I'm very curious to find out ".

I prepared tea as she fully explained the incedent at lunch. "After interval I started going to my next class which was in building two. I had home economics so I would be cooking. That was my opportunity". "Opportunity? Did you put something inside Fukui-kun's food?" "Sort of. Although, it wasn't hers to begin with. You see, I put this in one of the rice balls that I made". Akane took out a small object from her student ID. It was a thumbtack. Seeing how the small tip of the pin had blood on it caused a disturbed chill to go down my spine. That rarely happens. "Fukui-chan had gym class next period so I took my chance. Luckily she had rice balls in her lunch box. That's when I did it. That's when I taught her a valuable lesson. Now that she's in hospital...she won't bother you anymore". So she swapped the rice balls over so that Fukui-kun would swallow the thumbtack? Heh...What a deviant woman Akane is. "I understand. That's a good idea. Just...don't do it again". "Oh...okay. I won't. Promise". 

I turned on the stove to heat up the kettle. "Alright, now we just wait". "Uh, Yuuya?" "Yes, what is it now?" "Do you...still want to go on a date with me after what I did?" She sounded like a kid again. "Of course. The only thing that you have done wrong is nearly kill a girl...on purpose, might I add". "That's wonderful! I'm so happy. If you said no then I would have cried". Or you would have murdered me..."Uhh...Crying girls make me a little uncomfortable". "Why's that?" "I don't really know. Maybe it's because I don't know how to deal with them. Even if it was a family member". And I say that I want a cry-baby little sister. What is wrong with me? Well...a lot of things. For one, I might have a little sister complex, and two, I'm dating a brilliant red demon. Could my sanity slip further away by now? I heard the water boiling in the kettle and reached to turn of the stove. "Okay. Tea's done. Could you get the cups, please?" Akane searched the cuboard for two cups, which wouldn't be part of a set since I live alone. The only people who visit are my sister, Kurosaki and now Akane. 

Akane sat on the floor, sipping her tea. I kneeled down on the floor, next to her, sipping my own tea. "Mn...This is good. Where did you get it?" "Someone at work gave the tealeaves to me. It was a gift for covering his shift". "I see. You work part-time at a coffee place, right?" "Huh? I never told you that". "Uh! Um...Th-this tea is pretty good. Haha...Where did you get it?" "You just asked that". "Di-did I? Silly me...". Akane's face was very red. How did she know where I work? Maybe she was a stalker afterall. I decided to drop the subject, as I had the feeling that I would be going around in circles. "Where do you work, Akane?" "M-me? Well, my first job is at a bookstore in town. My second job is a waitress at that ice-cream place near the train station. We should to there for a date, sometime". "Sure. That would be nice. I'm not a big fan of ice-cream, but it could be a nice change of atmosphere". Akane placed her tea on the katsu in front of us. She then leaned her head against my shoulder affectionately. "I'm so happy". "Akane...?" I placed my drink down, too, so it didn't end up on the floor. "Did I say something?" "No. Of course not. I'm not making any sense again, aren't I?" "Not really". "Yuuya, can I kiss you?" "You don't have to keep asking for permission". "Hehe...I won't. This is the last time. Next time, we can kiss when the mood is right. Just like now". Akane pulled herself away from me. I turned as she did until our eyes met, despite our difference in height. I leaned down, leaning on my hands partially until our lips came into contact. Another soft kiss were ourr lips never parted to go deeper. I ppulled away. "Yuuya, would you like to use...um, y-you're t-tongue?" Akane blushed. My face was warm. Was I also blushing? "Uh...I don't really know how...". "Me neither. I heard that our tongues move against eachother in circles and such...Umm...You can take the lead, of course". "Oh, right...". I closed my eyes and leaned in again. I could sense that Akane was trembling. Our lips collided once more. 

Uh...What next? I've never been nervous before. It's irritating. I pushed my tongue out slowly, coming into contact with Akane's parted lips. It was now or definitely never, ever again. I slipped my tongue inside, a ticklish vibration running through my lips from Akane's moan. My eyes were squeezed shut. This was really awkward - not to mention embarrassing! I relaxed a bit when I gained dominance. I moved my tongue around Akane's, slowly and in circles, like she said. But I also explored a little. I flicked my tongue, causing Akane to jolt and whimper. It was pretty cute. I tilted my head for more angle and even rested my hand on her cheek for Akane to lean into. I pulled back, taking a short string of saliva with me. We both wiped our chins and panted heavily from the kiss. "That was...uh...". No words came out of my mouth. Akane stammered before letting her words trail off into an awkward silence. I removed my hand from her cheek. "Was it...bad for a first kiss?" Akane shook her head. "No. It felt really good. A little weird, but good". "Yeah, I suppose". There was another silence. That was my first ever kiss. Although it was kind of awkward, it was pleasant. "Akane, do you want to...do it again?" Akane lowered her eyes but spoke quietly with a smile. "Yes...". I moved in for a second deep kiss. I never imagined having a deep kiss with her, or with any girl for that matter. But here I was. What was the next step? A proper date, for now. However, intimately, what was to come? If I had that idea in my mind, I would also think that it would only come much, much later. To think about it...With Akane? Could I really do that? I didn't love Akane. To do something like that requires love, right? I wouldn't want to move too fast. I'm only seventeen, but...it all comes down to one thing. 

I am still a man. I wondered if hormones would come before logic when it came to Akane. For the sake of my image, I hoped not.


	11. A Sweet and Bitter Tongue

My first official date with Akane. Nothing special, just lunch at the park and shopping. However, Akane did think it was special since it was a date with me, as she always said. Today, Akane came to my apartment with a leather bag in hand. She was certainly dressed for a simple date during summer. A sky blue, sleaveless dress and a pink ribbon tied neatly in her hair, which still remained down by her waist. She also wore her usual cheerful smile. I didn't know how to react at first. She was quite stunning. "Um...Wow...You look...uhh...". "Do you like it?". "I guess. Oh, that reminds me. Hold on". I dug around in the cabinet by the door until I found it. The small blue box that I had been keeping for two days. "Here, this belongs to you". I opened it, and Akane gasped. "Oh my...My necklace...". I remembered the necklace that I had bought for her. The chain broke so all I could do was save the trinket and attach it to one of my neck chains. It wasn't as expensive or shiny but it was all I could find. "Allow me". I hung the necklace around her neck, retracting my hands when I heard the sharp clients. Akane smiled. "It's fixed. Although it was broken, I could never forget about it. Thank you, Yuuya". "It's no big deal, really. Perhaps it is to you, and that means something, doesn't it?" Akane brushed her fingers along the lengthy chain and held the slightly scratched trinket.

Akane leaned up to peck my lips once. It was a nice gesture, despite her first thank you. I made her happy. But I had a feeling that I would make her happy even when I said nothing. "Right, uh...Are you ready to go?" I nodded, taking Akane's hand first. I didn't exactly like affection but Akane would probably take my hand anyway. "So, what did you make?" I asked, looking oved to the bag in Akane's arm. "Sandwiches and iced tea. Is that okay?" "It's fine. I've already tried your cooking so it should be good". "I'm glad you think so. My parents would force me to take cooking classes from a private tutor for the future. I was expected to go through an arranged marriage and be a housewife until the day I died". "That's harsh. How old-fashioned are your parents?" "Very. My sister was expected to do the same, only she was to become an actress and violinist while her future husband would run the family business". My parents are equally dense and obtuse. They expected me to be like my siblings and shunned me because of my true self. I knew what it was like. I knew all too well. "It took a few years, but they eventually understood me and I moved out. They understood...loud and clear". "Akane...?" "Huh? Nothing. It's nothing. Uh, we're almost at the spot I was telling you about. Over here". 

Akane dragged me along to an isolated section of the park. It was at the bottom of an old shrine, hidden away by trees and shrubbery. I recognized it. On the other side was where the summer festival would take place near the end of summer vacation. That wouldn't begin for another week or so, at least. For now we had to go to school wearing summer uniforms and enduring the heat. There was a bench under all of the shade, with a wooden overhang. It really was quiet. We sat down, Akane taking out the lunch she brought. "I hope you like it". She said, unwrapping the checked cloth of the lunch box. Inside were several sandwiches with several different fillings. She went all out for this. "Why did you cut them into such small pieces?" Akane pierced the small fork she brought into one of the sandwiches and held it to me before answering my question. "Say 'ahh', Yuuya". She couldn't be serious. "R-really? Uh, isn't that a really sappy thing to do?" "Nope. Open wi~de". She spoke with a smile. I sighed in defeat. "Okay, okay". I let Akane feed me. Although it was a shameful action, I did find that the food was okay. "Well? How did I do?" "It's delicious. But don't feed me again". "Aww, but I wanna. You liked it when I fed you, right? You blushed and everything". "The answer is no and I didn't like it. Not one bi-". "Open up. Ahhh". Akane held another sandwich with the tiny fork. My eyebrow twitched. "Aren't you going to eat some?" "I already ate". "Wha-...?!" So the whole point of this was juist to feed me?! Akane giggled. "Teehee. Kidding. Omph". Akane ate the sandwich that she was previously holding out to me. I rolled my eyes, opening the can of tea that she had brought. The cold metal nipped at my fingers in the summer's heat.

When the can in my hand was already half empty, Akane and I were already in the middle of a conversation. "...So what is your plan after highschool? University? You're certainly smart enough". I spoke to Akane with my attention facing the park activity beyond our spot. "Yeah. I am planning to attend university. I want to become a doctor and find out what it means to help someone who's suffering". What an odd reason to persue a career in medicine. But it wasn't a bad reason. "I studied secretly, keeping medical books under my bed and looking through career books at school. If my parents found out, I would get into trouble. I knew I would...and I did. All because of my sister. Little bitch". Akane muttered the last part under her breath with a stern look. "So, what happened?" "My sister dragged me out into the downstairs lounge after school and...All of my books were in the fireplace, burning and turning into ash. My parents knew about my studying but not about my twisted sister's way of throwing out my hard work. So I was punished, not her". I didn't know what to say. Akane was already being reminded of her hardships as a child. Something told me that wasn't the only one. "I know what it feels like to have stuck up parents and power hungry siblings. My siblings would constantly use their status as the older children to boss me around. They always got their way because of the grades they received and the opportunities that they faced after highschool. Believe me, I know how shitty it feels". "It is shitty, isn't it?" 

Akane and I shared a momentary smile. Taking her bag, Akane stood and offered her hand to me. "Shall we go? The date isn't over". "Of course not". I stood, too, taking her hand. "Akane," I began as we left the shaded area. "My so-called friends invited me to the beach during summer vacation. I was wondering if you wanted to go, too". "Can I? I would have to pick out something to wear, since I don't have a bikini yet". "We're going shopping anyway, so you can...you know...". Being with Akane would remind me that I have shame as a man. I'm not interested in seeing Akane wear something like that. Also, Shimada would be there. He's a big pervert around women. If he tries anything with Akane then...then she'll kill him. Definitely. I can imagine it now. "What, are you thinking about me wearing one?" "N-no. Of course not. Do you think that I'm some kind of pervert?" "I think you are healthy as a seventeen year old boy who has an interest in me, a girl. You prefer women, right? Right?" "It's not about that. Although, I am fond of you Akane. I just choose not to pay attention to your body, like other men". I wasn't looking at Akane's body, really. I focused on her voice and words. Sure I found myself staring at her face a few times, but that wasn't the most important thing to me. 

"Yuuya, will you help me with picking out a swimsuit? If I show you one and you blush, I'm buying it". "Akane...You really...". Akane giggled happily. Would I be able to last with this girl. As it turned out, I blushed at a few bikinis that Akane showed me while shopping. Bikinis and only bikinis. My composure couldn't be any worse when I'm with Akane. But I don't hate it. That's the strange thing. I don't dislike the waves of embarrassment or Akane's sweet laughter whenever I react strangely. Her actions on different occasions make me wonder if she has a split personality disorder. Either that or my girlfriend is just crazy. We have something in common then. I held Akane's hand in the street, watching her smile with joy. How could a girl like her warm my microscopic heart?


	12. A Past Worth Forgetting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back. Um, a few notes before I start. This chapter is a flashback of Akane's childhood. Just a brief flashback. There will be about three chapters like this and they will be spread out as the story goes on. Also, I might have mentioned that I will be doing other fanfictions like this one that involve Kizami being shipped with a certain character type. For example, this fanfiction is Kizami x an obvious Yandere. I plan to do more fanfictions with different character types such as a Tsundere girl, a Dandere girl and so on. If you don't know what they are then you probably won't give an opinion. I would like an idea of which to do next after this fanfiction. Please, let me know in the comments. It can be any character type. Any at all.

Akane's POV

Nine Years Ago... 

Rain...It never stops raining. There's rarely any sunlight to even slip through the curtains. If I stand out in it...who would care? Who would even glance over at the little girl with no umbrella and no destination as she waits next to the bus stop? I simply shook my head at the driver who was briefly waiting for me to get on. I thought about going home, many times. But I never wanted to go back there first. I would walk along the lonely road with my head hung low. If I went back there, I would have to listen to my sister, to my parents. How they scowl at me for coming home drenched. I'm not like other children, you see. They look at me within a huddle of classmates, whispering and giggling at my despair as a human being. Why did I have to be born at all? For me to think such thoughts and do the things that I do. 

On that particular evening, I walked past the convenience store, stopping at the alleyway when I heard an echoed meow. A kitty. I turned to it. Yes, a small cat with messy fur sat in a beaten up box. It was drenched but still wore a cat-like smile. It pissed me off. I walked to the creature and crouched down, picking it up from under its arms. I stared into its eyes, scowling. "You should die, too. You and this town. Everything should die...". Such hateful words from such a young girl. Well, I hated a lot of things. I hated my family, my house, my short hair and thick glasses that I didn't even need. I even hated animals. Small, innocent, fragile animals. I put the cat back in the box, and reached for my school bag. Inside was nothing but a pencil and a pair of scissors, blunt ones for construction paper. The things that kids use. I would commit terrible acts like that, feel nothing and walk away with a heavy heart in the knowledge that I could never take it back. That's what made me different. That's what isolated me from others. My twisted hobby of killing animals and my heavy heart. 

Upon returning to my ridiculously large home, I knew that it was empty. Just me again, alone in my large, furnished cage. After I entered, I couldn't leave for the rest of the night. I took off my shoes, the bottom of my socks drenched from stepping in ankle-high puddles. A bath, homework, reading and then bed before anyone came home. I had already eaten at the small ramen place near the town. That's where I spent my allowance. I couldn't buy my own clothes or entertainment. So I kept my dinner plans a secret. I would sit in the bathtub, staring at my toes and nothing else, running the tips of my fingers along the v-shaped strands of hair on my head. It managed to grow down to my neck finally. Maybe when I was older, I could let my hair grow to whatever length that I wanted. The putrid stink of blood filled the bathroom. I looked over at my school bag, lying in the sink with a red blood stain on the bottom. Why did I take the cat with me? Oh, because the convenience store owner would scream like the fat pig he is. A creep, too. "Heh, maybe I can dump it on his doorstep one day". Maybe not. He would know it was me. Talking to myself was becoming a habit. It was a sort of comfort from everyone else and their irrelevant chatter. 

Eight years old and already as mad as a hatter, like my twisted sister. These thoughts ran around my head when everything else around me was still. When I was alone in a motionless room. My maddening thoughts were distracting the tiny dripping of the baths faucet. My head was noisy with thought and hate towards others. No wonder I can't sleep at night. I decided to get out of the bath. After changing into a suitable nightdress, I would have to clean up the bloody mess that I made in my bathroom sink. 

Homework was, once again, a trivial bore. I went downstairs after finishing to grab a juice from the kitchen. The front door opened, and my father came in. I stared at him from a distance. I used to love my father, more than mother. Now I hate them both. Father would tell me stories when I was little, and hug me, and give me lots of kisses like a father would. He changed after I started going to a proper school. He would barely pay attention to me and even ignore me. All of his focus and love went to my big sister. When my mother came home, she glared at me as if I was a stranger living in her house. She was a bitter woman from the moment that I cried for the first time. She was the one to beat me when I did something wrong. She...despised me. And, finally, my sister. The arrogant, selfish, little slut that lived in the bedroom four rooms away. She was the worst of the worst. Gloating at me every chance she got. She was three years older than me and still immature. She came home and greeted me like she usually does. "Oh, it's you again. What a bother". She would bully me before anyone at school ever did. I was afraid to attempt riding a bike in case she pushed me over. I could never go to the swimming pool with her in fear that she might try to drown me like a bag of kittens. 

I hated all of them and no one understood that. I had never felt so alone. If only there was someone like me. If only they could understand. Then I would love them for the rest of my life. Even if they were a girl or boy. Even if they didn't love me back. Even if they were an evil being. I would love them forever and ever...


	13. The Red Ocean

Kizami's POV

Present Day 

"Akane? Akane...?" There we were, in my bedroom with daylight blasting through my windows and clothing scattered on the floor by my wardrobe. Unexpectedly, Akane spaced out. She was staring at the floor with a blank, almost dead, expression. When I finally shook her shoulder, she jumped. "Wah! Ah...um...Wha-what are you suprising me for, mister man?!" She was so caught off guard that she was talking nonsense again. "Um, you spaced out for a while. Is everything alright?" "Yep! Everything is great! Fine, actually! Hahah...". She laughed awkwardly. This girl was crazy. "Uh...yeah. Um, do you have everything?" "For what?" "For the beach trip with everyone. I thought that you were excited for it". "Oh, the beach! Right...sorry. Y-yeah, I have everything. Uhh...I'm gonna go change in the bathroom. I'll be right back". Akane left for the bathroom in a hurry. What was all that about? I narrowed my eyes in thought and confusion. Curiosity, too. If she was thinking about something that bothered her, was it my right to get involved, even as her lover? 

Wait, lover? Is that really the right word? Whenever someone uses the word lover, doesn't it usually refer to two people who are in a sexual relationship? Akane and I haven't done anything like that yet. Wait...YET?! Was I planning to do those things with her? No! I couldn't! I couldn't possibly indulge in such activities. Akane is attractive but I could never think of her in a sexual way. "Yuuya...?" I heard Akane's voice as she approached the bedroom again. "What is it, Akane?" I calmed down. "Which bikini should I wear?" Huh? Akane came into the room and I gulped. She continued, holding up two different bikinis with nothing but a towel around her slender body. So many perfect curves and...Nonono! Wait, wait, wait! I had to be serious and calm. "The orange one, or the one with pandas?" "Uh! Umm...Wh-what do pandas have to do with the beach?" Don't stall! Just pick one! Her towel looked like it could drop at any moment. "Hm...I guess you're right. Well, I would always trust your opinion, Yuuya". Akane then approached me. No. No. No! Don't! I tried to back away but she only moved faster, crouching down beside me. I immediately looked away to the side. "Don't be shy. It's just me, silly". Akane's voice had become quiet and sensual. 

Was there any point to be shy? Yes, there was. Akane was so close to me, with only a towel on. Her hand was placed on my cheek. Her face presented a sense of happiness and contentment. As if her life at the moment was like a dream-come-true. Everything that she ever wanted was hers, including me. "Yuuya, may I ask you a serious question?" "Sure, go ahead". Akane's cheeks flushed. Her smile faded into a worried frown. "When...when you begin to love me, will you...will you m-make love to me?" "Gah...". My mind went blank. I didn't know what to say as a suitable response. "Wh-why are you asking that all of sudden?" Akane held my hand in hers, circling her finger around one of the knuckles softly. It tickled. "Well, you don't have to answer yet. Don't worry. I'm a pure young woman. Intercourse should be out of love and trust, right?" "I suppose so". "Then, will you? Will you make love to me when you are certain that you love me? Promise it". What could I say to her? I didn't love Akane. I don't think I ever will. But seeing her follow false hope could be disastrous in the end. She could realise that I don't want to love her, and then what? What would she do in the moment of despair? Would she cry or simply fall to pieces? I was intrigued by the thought. "A-alright, Akane. I promise". Akane's happiness lit up like a house on fire. She suddenly wrapped her arms around me and squeezed tightly. My face flushed as I felt her soft and suppleness against my chest, big and soft. "A-Akane...". Oh shit. Her towel was slipping away! "A-Akane! G-get your towel. It's slipping!" I have never lost my composure so much before. It crashed and burned. "Oops! Sorry, Yuuya...". She pulled away, holding the towel back up to cover herself up. "I'm going to get dressed now. Sorry for suprising you". "Apology accepted, I think". Akane got up and left. I collapsed backwards, covering my eyes with my arm. My face was hot and my heart was racing. Damn it... 

We met up with Kurosaki and some of the others, including Yamamoto, Katayama, Ohkawa and Urabe, at the train station. Kurosaki waved at us with his arm in the air. I looked to Akane who was wearing a normal t-shirt and mini-skirt, carrying a small bag which carried the usual necessities for the beach. "Hi, you two love-birds!" Yamamoto greeted us with both hands on her hips. My eyebrow twitched in slight annoyance. "Don't tease them, Mitsuki". Thank you, Urabe. "But you do look cute together". I take that thank you back. "Whoa, don't tell Kirisaki that". Katayama was right. If Kirisaki heard them, she would probably get depressed. "Oh, shoot! I shouldn't say that, huh?" Akane stood there quietly, lightly holding my hand, as if being prepared to protect me. 

We met up with everyone else on the beach itself, including Kirisaki, Fukuroi and Shimada. That was our group, but I feared that Akane would feel out of place. "Great. Everyone's here". Yamamoto announced. "All the girls are gonna go change in the locker rooms. See you guys in a bit". The girls went off on their separate ways for now, while the boys went to the men's changing rooms. I spoke to Kurosaki the whole time that we were changing. "So, how did the date go? I forgot to ask". "It was...okay". "It was 'okay'? Are you serious?" "Well, what do you want me to say?" "I want to hear juicy details. What did you do? Where did you go? What did you do to her in the bedroom? That kinda stuff!" I playfully slapped Kurosaki on the arm. "Ouch! Okay...I deserve that for commenting on your nightly activities". "Kurosaki, we haven't done anything like that. We've only...". I paused. "Eh? Ehh? Come on~. What did you do~, Ki~za~mi~?" Kurosaki dragged his words out, nudging me with his elbow and flashing a suggestive grin. I couldn't help but smirk a little when he wiggled his eyebrows. "Haha...Okay, okay. We just kissed". "With tongue?" "Not in the beginning, but...". "Atta boy!" Kurosaki gave me a light slap on the shoulder. "I told you. You're still a man, Kizami. I was right, huh?" "Shut up. It was just kissing". "With tongue~". I rolled my eyes. Never change, you goofball. 

The beach was suprisingly quiet. There were other people, but not a lot. I sat under the shade of a parasol. Half of the group played around in the water while the other half stayed on the sand or under the shade. "Um, Yuuya, what do you think?" I turned my attention to the voice of Akane and my drowsiness from lying under the shade flew past me and into nothingness. Akane smiled shyly. She was wearing the orange bikini that I suggested without thinking. It sort of brought out her cream coloured skin. She wore a matching sarong around her waist, like a long skirt. It stretched down to her ankles and revealed her slim leg and hip behind the knot of the clothing piece. "Wow. You look...". "Heh, it's kinda embarrassing now that I've put it on. I hope that it's not too...flashy". "A little bit. Orange is a good colour on you, though". "Really? I'm glad". Akane sat close to me. Very close. I flinched when Akane suddenly wrapped both her arms around one of mine, pulling me close. "A-Akane...everyone is here. Why...?" "I want to make Kirisaki-chan jealous. Just like how she made me mad. I want to see the look on her dirty face like the dirty bird she is". "A-Akane...!" My elbow was...being partially sucked in. It was so supple that my arm was slightly pushed back. "Oh dear god...". I whispered to myself. I couldn't let myself get flustered by something like that. I tried to place my thoughts somewhere else to cool off. 

"Hey, Yuuya, how come you're still wearing a t-shirt?" "I don't like to show my upper body. People, especially women, would stare. It happens at the swimming pool". "Come to think of it, I've never seen your body before. I guess...I can wait for...y'know...". Akane was being bashful again, circling the tip of her finger around the point in my elbow. She rested her cheek on my shoulder, at its curve. For a moment, Kurosaki looked over at us, and then gave a warm smile as if to simply say; "Good job, buddy". With a thumbs up. "Listen, Akane, I...". I wanted to tell her that I wouldn't be able to 'make love' to her. I wasn't planning on it. At all. "Akane...I don't think I could ever...". "It's alright, Yuuya. You may say that you won't make love to me one day. But, I know that you will. I know it". Akane smiled softly. She wasn't mad? "I've been dreaming of this ever since I learned about intercourse and why humans do it. I had to learn through books, just like with my period". "What do you mean?" "My mother never told me about my period. It happened when I was still in elementary school. I was ten years old and it just...happened. I screamed in the middle of class when I saw blood appear on my skirt. My stomach ached and I couldn't stop crying. One of the female teachers had to take me out of class and convince me that I wasn't going to die. I still blame my mother. She took no responsibility, whatsoever". Akane squeezed my arm tightly. She scowled, wiping her eyes of tears. Her voice was trembling. "H-hey, don't cry. It's in the past, isn't it? It would be only natural for a girl to be frightened when something like that happens. Afterall, it wasn't explained to you"."I'm glad that you understand". "Anyone would". I looked around for a moment, then went back to Akane. "Come on. We should go somewhere private since you're crying. I know a place in the beach". "O-okay...". I took Akane's hand and lead her away from the crowds. 

I took her up a wooden stairway, littered with grains of sand from people's journeys up the steps. No one was at the top. The top was a stone balcony, wide enough to fit twenty people with some extra space. There was a lonely bench next to a small group of trees. A wooden fence surrounded the edge of the overlook, matching the same dark wood as the stairs. "This way...". I said, still holding Akane's hand. "This is...um...It's amazing up here". "It is. Only when it's quiet. People ruin the scenery of this spot". We sat on the bench, our hands parting. "Woah, you can see the ocean from here". "During the late afternoon, when the sky turns orange, it reflects a light red. At least, that's what it looks like from here". "The Red Sea. Heh, I like it". I collected my hands neatly on my lap. Akane just told me something that most people would keep a secret. I couldn't let it go without question. "Um, Akane, about earlier, you didn't have to tell me something that personal. It wasn't something that you had to tell me". "But I wanted to tell you". "Why? Something that traumatic shouldn't be brought back into words, to anyone. Especially a man like myself". Akane smiled as if it was nothing to be ashamed of. Her eyes were focused on the sandals barely staying on her feet as she swung them back and forth in a slow rhythm. "Yuuya, when I was a child, I was always alone. Children would pretend that I didn't exist like my parents did. Teachers would try to shed sympathy for me but I knew that they thought of me as a bother. Ever since that incident happened, people were more aware of me. But they avoided me. I was the only girl at school who had started her period. To them, I was gross or diseased". Akane lowered her head, her smile had disappeared long afted she had started. "I had no one to talk to. My mother denied her responsibility and my sister hated me. I was so alone. All because of my appearance, my personality, the way I was...and just because I was different. Stupid...They're all stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Idiots! Dirty birds! COCKADOODIE HEADS!" Akane stood up and screamed insults to the sky. Each one getting louder until she screamed 'Cockadoodie heads'. Several birds could be heard, squawking and flapping their wings in fear. Akane panted heavily, cradling herself. I stood up, wrapping an arm around her. She flinched for a moment and then accepted my comfort. 

"Akane, it's okay. You're not alone anymore. I'm here". "Yes. I'm all too aware of that". "What do you mean?" Akane lowered her head again. "I...I'm sorry, Yuuya. I lied". "...?" She...lied? About what? Why? "I...I don't like...you". "Akane, what are you saying? Tell me clearly. Now". Akane smiled a little, looking up at me with tears in her eyes. 

"I...I'm in love with you". 

"...?!" "I...I love you, Yuuya. I love you so, so much". Akane's voice was quiet but I heard her loud and clear. I stood there, staring at her, frozen. Only the sound of the calm waves filled this silence. The calm, red waves that were reflected from the orange sky and pink clouds. I didn't realise where the time had gone. My mind was blank. All I could here was the waves. The soft, red waves of the red sea.


	14. Two Younger Siblings, Two Older Sisters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm rewriting this because I know that I can do better.

"Yuuya? Yuuya, please say something". What could I possibly say in this situation? Akane had just confessed her love to me. Love! How am I supposed to deal with something that I cannot comprehend? Akane and I aren't so similar afterall. And to love someone like me is insanity in itself. "Akane, I...Um, I really don't know how to respond to that. If I'm honest". "Oh, do you...not accept my feelings?" Her voice sounded a bit cold just then. As if I shattered all of her hopes and dreams. "It's not like that. I've never received a love confession before and, because of that, I don't know how to deal with it, mentally". "Oh. I see. Do you need time to think about it?" "If that's how you want to put it. Yes, I need some time. And it's not as if I won't accept your feelings. I will just need to get used to them". That was certainly one way around this mess. I lied again. The habit of mine that grows and grows like any lie. Only I don't feel guilty about my lies. Ever. So how can a lie really grow if there is no guilt? The less guilt you feel, the less likely someone would find out about your lie. But with Akane, I felt as if my lies would certify death for me.

"I understand. Well, have as much time as you would like". Akane leaned up, giving me a kiss on the cheek. "Right. We should probably head back. Everyone else is probably wondering where we are". "Yuh-huh. Come on, take my hand". I held Akane's hand, which we usually did now. Afterall, Akane would usually insist on it whenever we were alone. I wondered why she acted so collected when I didn't give a straight answer. Was she embarrassed by saying that she loved me and was still trying to keep a cool head about it? Who could say? I couldn't. I bet that no one could guess what all of the messed up shit in Akane's head was about. I could imagine her thoughts resembling a children's first drawing. Unreadable scribbling of many different colours to create darker ones. That was what my drawings looked like in kindergarten, anyway. 

We returned under the parasol and under the shade. Everyone was still doing their own thing, mainly relaxing on the sand and under shade. I lay down on my back, feeling worn out from the whole day. I crossed my arms behind my head as I stared up. Akane quietly looked out towards the quiet ocean. This was a peaceful scene. However, my thoughts weren't so peaceful. They were running around in circles. All I could think about was Akane's words and her sweet voice along with it. 

'I'm in love with you'. 

Over and over. I thought that I was going to get a headache. I couldn't concentrate on anything else. But I said nothing about it. I didn't say a word to Akane until the next time that we were alone. That was half an hour later, once everyone had started going home. Tonight, I walked Akane back to her apartment. We held hands and spoke of casual things. "Today was quite fun, Yuuya. I like your classmates. The only exception is Kirisaki-chan and Shimada-kun. He says the eff word a lot. Eff this and eff that. It's annoying. Why can't everyone talk like me?" "If everyone talked like you then it wouldn't make it unique. Even if it's undoubtedly weird, I still think that it's unique for a girl your age to say such childish words". "Unique? Really?" "Really. I wouldn't say those words myself but I certainly won't stop you". We stopped walking at the entrance of Akane's apartment building. "Yuuya, can I call you tonight?" "There's no need to ask. Call me if you want". "Super. I'm gonna go, then. Bye, Yuuya". I gave her a quick peck on the lips before parting hands. I watched as Akane went into her building without another word. I started to walk home. The street was empty and silent. The atmosphere sent a chill down my spine. It made me think about the three thugs that attacked me and Akane. They were still missing. Akane had obviously done something. But what? What did she do? 

At home, I decided to go straight to bed after dinner and a shower. Lying down on my futon, without the cover, I stared up at the ceiling. The darkness of the room was guiding me into sleep. As I was about to close my eyes, a soft buzzing emitted from the desk in my room. My cellphone. I got up to answer the call, with a groan. Checking the caller ID, I sighed deeply and answered. "Hello, Akane". Couldn't she have called earlier? ["Hi, Yuuya. Sorry for calling so late. I was, uh, busy"]. "Busy? That's not very specific". ["Why do you sound so suspicious of me? I only had to make dinner for myself and do laundry. That's all"]. "Right. Sorry". ["That's okay. Oh, also, I won't be at school tomorrow since I have work. One of my colleagues got sick so I have to fill in at the store. There's a big sale coming up so they need an extra pair of hands"]. As she spoke, I sat back down on my futon with my legs crossed. "I see. Well, I could bring tomorrow's work over for you". ["Eh, oh...um, why don't I go to your place instead? We could make it a date"]. Why not her place? I wasn't sure and I had a right to be suspicious. This was Akane afterall. "Alright. It's a date. But why can't I bring the work over to your apartment?" ["I'm doing a spring cleaning, I guess. There's damp and filth so I'm cleaning it out"]. "I see. I'll see you tomorrow, then". ["Yep. I'll see you tomorrow. Oh, and Yuuya? I love you"]. I didn't reply. I hung up my cellphone and turned it off for the night. I put it on the floor and lay down on my futon, pulling the cover up. A spring cleaning, huh? What could she be hiding? Over the years I had grown a habit of not trusting people of any sort, unless they're honest to me. I know what Akane is like. She's like me. Twisted in the head, untrustworthy, and so on. What if she was clearing out corpses. Possibly...Now I know not to be suprised if it is. I closed my eyes, drifting off to sleep finally.

Akane definitely wasn't in school the next day. The desk behind me remained empty all day. In the evening, I went straight home to change and go shopping for groceries. But, unfortunately for me, an obstacle blocked my path. "What the hell are you doing here?". Outside of my apartment door was my annoying and melding elder sister Haruna. She had not visited in a while but I was perfectly happy that she didn't and didn't care for the reason. "I'm being kind enough to see if my little brother has burned down his apartment or not. Oh, and I bought some stuff for a stir fry. Aren't I a good sister?" "Did you hit your head somewhere on the way? Are you feeling sick? This isn't like you. Are you perhaps Haruna's doppelganger?" My sister furrowed her eyebrows, unamused. "Yuuya, I can be nice sometimes. I have a boyfriend, y'know". "Can't see how that happened". "Alright, you little shit. Here". Haruna passed over the shopping bag. "See, that's the big sister I know". "Shut up. Can I come in? I haven't seen you in a long time". "Sure, whatever, sis'". Unlocking the door, I went ahead and set the bag on the kitchen counter after taking off my shoes. Haruna followed, sitting at the kitchen table, wearing my slippers. "So, how have you been doing?" I took the ingredients from the bag, along with a chopping board and knife for the vegetables. "Fine. A lot better than when I lived with you". Haruna's eyebrow twitched at my comment. It's true that after I moved out of my folks house, I started living with Haruna. That was only because I had hardly any money to pay rent since it went up. "What's that supposed to mean? I kept a roof under your head, didn't I? Aren't you the least bit grateful?" "If I wasn't, you would have kicked me out long ago. So I did chores and pulled my weight". "I would have let you stay, anyway". I continued to chop the vegetables, not making a contribution to her statement. 

"So, why are you making dinner now? You could save it for later"."I'm starving". "Did you not eat a proper lunch? I keep telling you to eat proper meals every day. Don't ignore common sense, Yuuya". "Shut up. Don't tell me what to do anymore. I'm not a child". "Sure do act like one, though". I held the knife to her, from a distance of course. "Wanna fight? I can take you on, Haruna! Don't underestimate me!" "Hahaha. You never change, do you?" I lowered the blade, rolling my eyes, and continuing with making dinner. "Seriously, you can have it later. No one's forcing you to eat it now". "It isn't about that". "I see. Is it a girl?" "That's none of your business". "Maybe but I'm curious. She must be vey tolerant and patient to put up with you". "I guess we have a few things in common, then". I could imagine getting hit for that. "How rude. Well, we are siblings. Kizami's are strong in body and will. Hm, you remind me a lot of dad, like myself. Kouki is more like mom, don't you think?" "Haruna. You're talking to the wrong sibling". "Sorry, Yuuya. I got so caught up that I forgot...Oh, come here". I felt my sister's arms wrap around me, over my arms. She petted my hair like she would when I was a child. It was sickening. "Yuuya, I've been telling you this for a long time. But Ii keep wondering if you understand by now. We all love you, very much. Me, your brother. I bet that, deep down, mom and dad still see you as their sweet Yuu-yuu"."You swore never to repeat that pet name". Haruna ignored me, continuing to talk crap. "They still love you. It may not appear that way, but I know that they still care". I feebly pushed my sister away, intending to use no force. "Listen, Haruna. They've already forgotten about me. End of discussion". Haruna wore a saddened face. Like that would make me feel guilty. It doesn't. 

"Okay, then. If that's how you feel still. But I won't give up, Yuuya. I know that you have a good heart. You just have to try and find it yourself". Haruna went to open the door to leave. "It was nice talking to you again, Yuuya. Take care of yourself". She opened the door and..."...!" And she stopped. "Haruna, what...?" I went to check for myself, freezing in place when I saw it. "Yuuya, who's this?" Haruna asked me as she stared at Akane. Akane had an empty expression as she stared right back at my sister. Shit...Akane had never seen my sister. She was definitely going to get the wrong idea. "Who...?" Akane spoke in a quiet and empty tone. This was really bad. "Hello, Akane. You could have called to say when you were coming over". I stepped in. "Um, Akane, this is my big sister, Haruna. I told you about her, remember". Akane's expression lit up. I actually saved my sister from being killed. How is that a relief for me?! "Akane...?" Haruna looked at me with an arched eyebrow. "Her first name? So she's your...girlfriend". I looked away, awkwardly nodding. "Y-yeah..Haruna, this is my girlfriend, Akane Hayashi". "Good evening. I'm Haruna Kizami, Yuuya's older sister, as he established. It's very nice to finally meet someone who can put up with him". "Ah! It's lovely to meet you too. Um, your brother is very kind to me. He's a wonderful boyfriend". "Is that so?" Haruna smirked. Don't tell me that she was loving every moment of this. "Well, I would love to talk to you more, Akane-chan, but I have to go. I wouldn't want to disturb you two". "Right. Thank you. Goodnight, Haruna-onee-chan". Haruna left the apartment. Akane took her shoes off and entered the room. "She came over suddenly, Akane. I didn't know that she was going to come over at all. I'm sorry". "Don't apologise, silly. Um, Yuuya, what's your sister like?" Why ask? "She meddles into my business and would scold me whenever I did something wrong. She thinks of herself as the almighty sister, treating me like I'm still a child". "I see...Do you hate her?" "Hate is a strong word. I used to despise my sister. Now that I'm more mature, I only see her as a nuisance". "Heh, just like my sister". Akane turned towards me with a smile on her face. The look of happened didn't suit her cold tone of voice just then. "So, what do you want to do for our date?" 

After the dinner I had prepared, I sat with Akane on the sofa to watch a movie that was showing on T.V. I had no interest in such things but it gave us something to do until late. Akane cuddled up to me. That would be inevitable. She was clingy, in more ways than one. I didn't have a problem with it, really, just as long as she asked. Right now I wasn't in the best of moods after Haruna's visit. Eventually she had to give up on me, like my parents. If not, she's a fool. "So, your sister seemed interesting. In a way, she reminds me of my sister, only nice". "Believe me, she is not nice. Haruna is controlling and nosey. But she doesn't seem to disapprove of our relationship, at least". "My sister would have disapproved". Akane's voice was suddenly quiet. If she didn't really want to talk about her sister, that was fine by me. "I have a big brother too". "Yes, you told me.What is he like?" "He was like my sister too, only he used violence to scold me. Then he would cry about it". "Tch, what a sap. I got the feeling that Haruna-onee-chan was a bully, too. All big sister's are bullies". I wasn't sure if that was true. Perhaps she was saying so because of experience with her own sister. But I couldn't argue since I only have one sister. "So, if you had a younger sibling, would you bully them?" "Of course not. I would love them to bits. I would never hurt them". That wasn't how put it as a child. If I had a little brother I would love the shit out of him. And if I had a little sister... "No, I suppose you wouldn't". "Hey...Yuuya?" "Hm? What is it?" Akane averted her eyes, looking uncertain and down. "Would you ever want to meet my sister?" Where did that come from? Well, Akane did meet my sister today. But to meet Akane's sister..."No. I wouldn't. She sounds like a twisted bitch. The way you talk about her makes me think that she treated you badly. I wouldn't want to meet her". Akane looked suprised but then smiled softly. "I see. Yes, why would you want to talk to her? You wouldn't". She was talking quietly again. Why? Was she thinking about something that involved her sister? That had to be it. I sat back in the sofa, holding Akane with one arm while I set my other hand on my lap. I was very curious about Akane's childhood. She already mentioned bits and pieces but not the whole story. Maybe in her own time, I would find out. Maybe... 

I felt Akane's head become heavy against my chest. Was she falling asleep? I sighed, allowing her that. She had worked today and cleaned her apartment. Gently, I lay her down on my sofa and pulled a blanket over her. When I did, I felt a soft vibration from my pocket. My cellphone again. I went into my bedroom to answer it. "Hello..?" ["Hi, Yuuya, it's me"]. "Haruna? What is it now?" ["Don't sound so disappointed. Anyway, I just called to see how you're doing"]. "Is that all or are you trying to interupt my date with Akane?" ["Of course not. What kind of sister do you take me for"]. "Haruna, Akane and I haven't had sex yet". ["Oh, thank god. I was worried that I had to give you a lecture on safety"]. "Uh-huh. I thought so. Listen, I'm not like that. Besides, Akane fell asleep anyway so I wouldn't be able to do anything in the first place - as if I would". ["I see. That's okay, then. I'm happy for you, Yuuya. I had my doubts, but you actually found a lovely girl. Only..."]. "Haruna...?" Haruna hesitated for a brief time. Then she finally spoke. ["I don't know. Maybe I was just being a bit paranoid, but...Hayashi-san...has a weird smell"]. "A weird smell?" I didn't really notice a smell. However, she certainly didn't smell like her usual sweet fragrance of vannila. ["Yeah. It seemed familiar. I can't quite put my finger on it. All I know is that it wasn't a nice smell. I shouldn't be picky about her, I'm just concerned. Where does Akane work, if she has a job?"] "At a bookstore. The one with new and secondhand books". ["I see. Hm, maybe it's that? I don't know. Uh, I better go. My train is almost here. I'll talk to you another time, okay, Yuuya?"]. "Right, okay. Bye". I hung up. A weird smell? I didn't smell anything from Akane. Was it just Haruna? I looked through the crack of my door. Akane still lay on the sofa, the blanket covering her body. I looked away from the door. I could swear that I saw Akane awake. Her eyes open, her pupils dilated, staring right at me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm taking a short break from this until I start coming up with more ideas for chapters.


	15. The First, Forgettable Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just gonna ssh and get on with it from now on.

Akane's POV 

Age thirteen was when I received private tutors. I was taken out of school and thrown back into my large, furnished cage. Everyday, even on a Sunday, I was trapped in the grey room at the back of the house. Our library was more colourful than this, the third study in our house. I had four tutors. One who taught Japanese, English, Literature and Social Studies. The second taught Mathematics and Geography. The third taught Modern Art (through textbooks) and Music (the violin and cello). The fourth taught me Home Economics, Composure and how to generally act like a stuck-up lady. It was boring. No matter how fast I learned and no matter how many questions I got right, I was totally bored out of my mind. I wanted to go outside again, to see the world beyond my furnished cage. The world was so small compared to my cage. That's what I believed when I was a child. Once I went through books and illustrations of the whole world I began to take interest in how big our universe really was. But I could only ask for studying purposes.

Age fourteen was when I found a tunnel to the outside. Finally I was allowed free time, to go into the backyard. It was like a labyrinth of walls and trees. So much so that they nearly blocked out the very sky above. I ventured through the winding walls until I reached an old, unused shed at the very end of the stone maze. Vines twirled around the wood, growing through small gaps that had been broken by natural causes. I glanced behind me, to check if any monsters were following me. None. Only a calm breeze to encourage me forward, to escape the labyrinthine and my cage. Entering the shed, I looked around for a way out. My attention came to a grate in the corner of the wood. It was partially broken due to small critters clawing their way through. Tiny droplets of dry blood stained the rusted iron. I sat back, using my feet to kick what remained of the thin grate. It creaked and squeaked until it became loose from the hinges. With one last forceful and frustrated kick, I knock the grate away. I did it. Even though I was young and curious, I was smart enough to know that I couldn't escape without knowing exactly where I was going. I could go into town, but I needed money and directions. For now, just a peek of the outside. 

I crawled out, successfully fitting through the gap. Several birds chirped, the suns ray shone down upon me. Outside of my caged kingdom was woodlands. It was just like a fairytale. I remember such things from the story books that I kept so well hidden. My thoughts went blank as I stared into the trees and beyond. But only for a moment could I appreciate the scenery. Quickly, I scurried back through my escape tunnel, covering it up with an old wooden crate. I pushed up my thick glasses, suddenly realising that my appearance would be a dead giveaway if anyone saw me. I had to think. I had to create a disguise for myself. 

I had to sneak into big sis's room to get what I wanted. She hid them like I hid my story books. Only she hid teenage magazines with articles on clothes and pictures with half-naked men on them. Sometimes she would bring her friends over, pretending to study with them, but would instead drink daddy's alcohol and laugh about irrelevant things. They used the eff word a lot. Calling eachother a word that I never heard before. The word 'whore' or 'slut'. It made my blood boil just hearing their goofy words. Bunch of cockadoodie heads...Anyway, I searched for her magazines, finding several that were dated back several months ago. With that in mind, I doubted that she would miss them. I took the small pile back to my own room and look through each. I found out a few interesting things that woukd possibly help me. Something called 'hair extensions'. Apparently they make your hair look longer even though it's not natural. New clothing styles, clip-on earings, and a fact about soy milk helping to make your chest grow. Or I could just use padding in a bra. I didn't need my glasses, so why wear them outside? I had written these things down in a sort of list. Some of these things I could only get in town, others I could make by myself. I was careful to put my sisters weird magazines back where I found them before moving on with my quest to make a disguise for myself. 

Gradually I found these things for myself, finally able to venture out into the world. Luckily my sister stored hair extensions in her closet, long enough to go down to my waist. I took off my glasses, placing them in my purse. I also aquired clip-on earings, also from my sister. I even made a new dress for myself after all of those Home Economics classes. I was ready. On my free period, I ran out through the stone labyrinth and to the wooden escape tunnel. I wasted no time to fly away from my cage. I ran down the pathway of earth and to the main road. From my research of Geography I learned about the area surrounding the house, therefore I knew of the nearby bus stop. I took the next bus into town, acting like a normal civilian. That was the most interaction that I had with the outside world, at first. I stared out of the window in awe of the landscapes to pass. 

When I arrived in town, I took out the small sketch I made of the town map. I studied it for a few days until I got the gist of the directions and pathways. Surely there were a few tourists from places like Tokyo, people who wish to get away from ths city and instead travel to the countryside of Japan. I felt the exact opposite, of course. Looking around, I didn't stand out much. I was just a normal girl here. Yep, normal and average as can be. I walked around, entering a few stores with some interesting items displayed on the windowsills. Mostly candy, but I was never allowed to eat sweets, and I couldn't exactly buy anything that I could keep. Eventually, I had spent over half of the allowance that I brought. I came to a stop, by a small fountain in the town park, choosing to sit down and take a rest. Everything was as I expected. Fun, exciting, new. Once I would eventually get bored, I could travel further and further away until I was finally free. Still, "I would still be all alone". I mumbled to myself, feeling down about the idea of being alone. But that was inevitable. No one could understand me. No one. So I would always remain alone unless I put on a mask like my twisted sister. To act sweet and docile just so I could have friends. I didn't want that. I wanted friends who would like me for me. But...That's impossible, isn't it? I felt myself begin to tear up when...it happened. 

"Come on, Kizami! Hurry up!" "Yeah, yeah, I'm coming". Two male voices emitted from behind the wall that I was near. They sounded like boys. I quickly wiped my eyes, sneaking over in curiosity to check the commotion. I looked over from the side, seeing that it was indeed two boys. They looked around my age. One was wearing a cute and innocent smile, walking on ahead of the other who had his hands stuffed into his pockets and wore a serious expression. What was his problem? "Kurosaki, wait up". The moody boy spoke up to the other known as Kurosaki. Upon closer inspection, the serious one was...kind of cute. "Huh? What's wrong, Kizami?" 'Kurosaki' stopped to face his 'friend' with a worried look on his face. "Do you wanna rest for a moment?" "It's not that. I just...I appreciate that you brought me along with your parents but...I just dampen the mood. You should have just left me with my unloving parents". Unloving parents? Was that boy known as Kizami...just like me? The other boy offered a warm smile, patting the others shoulder. "Don't worry. I'm sure that they love you deep down". That's what they all say. "That's what they all say, the people who don't understand what it's like. My parents, my siblings...They don't give a damn about me. My parents ignore me, and my siblings treat me like a runt". Who was this boy exactly? He had parents and siblings like I did. The way he spoke of them in such a disgusted voice made my heart pound. "Hm...Well, I don't know how else I'm going to try and convince you. Listen, I'll be right back. I just have to go to the restroom. Is that okay?" "Oh? You don't need me to go with you?" Kurosaki blushed a little at his friend's intimidating words. "N-no, of course not. I-I'll be right back. Wait here". Kurosaki rushed off in a different direction. 'Kizami' waited for his return, mumbling to himself. "Tch, what do you know? Your parents love you unconditionally. Me? I never knew how my parent's love could change in a moment, just because I'm not an honour student like my holier-than-though siblings". I crouched down, my legs turning into jelly. What were these...feelings? My heart was pounding and my face was hot. That boy...He understood how I felt. He knew what it was like. Was I already falling for someone that I haven't even met? 

My legs continued to wobble as I stared at him. He was absolutely gorgeous...in so many ways. Suddenly, I lost my balance and snapped out of my trance, falling to the ground with a thud. "Oof...! O-ow...". "Huh? Who's there?!" Oh, no! He heard me loud and clear! I tried to get up but froze as he approached. I couldn't let him see me like this. Not like this! I quickly took out my glasses and put them on, tucking my hair into the back of my dress. The boy approached, looking suprised once he spotted me. We were both completely frozen, staring at eachother. "Um, are you alright?" He finally spoke up. I hesitated to answer, too entranced by his voice and beautiful blue eyes. He also had black, ruffly hair. He was the absolute image of a juvenile delinquent. Still, he was like a prince. "I-I'm okay. I just tripped and fell. I'm so clumsy...". "Here, take my hand". He offered his hand to me and my heart skipped a beat. My hand shook as I reached for it. Little did I realise how sweaty my hand was. Once I grabbed his hand, I fell right back down, taking him with me. "Wah! Ouch!" "Gah...Sorry...You okay?" I nodded, even when in slight pain from the impact. I opened my eyes and blushed crimson. His face was so close to mine! "Uh, I might have gotten your dress dirty. Sorry about that too". "I don't really c-care, so it's alright". He helped me back onto my feet. His hand was so soft and warm, I wished I could hold it forever. "Hey, do you live here?" He asked. I didn't know if it was okay to say yes. I mean, I was really embarrassed already. I shook my head. "So you're visiting? From where?" "T-Tokyo...". I lied. "How about you?" "I'm from Osaka. Me, my friend and his parents are just visiting Kyoto for two weeks during summer vacation". "Summer vacation?" I never had that before. I heard that sis went on trips during such a time but I never knew where or why. "Uhh, yeah. If I'm honest, it's kinda boring". "Is it?" "Yeah. I'd rather be by myself". "I see...Me too". Kizami looked over for a moment and then turned back to me. "I, uh, have to get going. It was okay talking to you, I guess". "Oh, uh-huh. You, too". "Maybe we'll see eachother again. Bye". Kizami left, running off into the distance, supposedly to meet up with his friend. My heart sank. I actually spoke to him...and felt his hand..."Sen-...pai...". I whispered, holding my hand close to my chest. 

I went back to my cage with a light heart. I couldn't snap out of this. Never had I felt this way about a boy before. Senpai understood me without realising it. I spent my time in my room, lying on my bed that was scattered with daisy petals and stems. Some broken, some whole. I giggle mindlessly as I pick off each individual petal while mumbling; "He loves me...He loves me not...hehe...He loves me...He loves me not...". I was so giddy that I forget about the wall which I built around myself. That wall was starting to have an opening. Just a small hole to peek at Senpai. Every time the circle of petals ended in 'he loves me not', I tore the stem in half. When it ended in 'he loves me', I hugged my pillow tightly, rolling around excitedly like a child who just received a new toy, one which they have always wanted. And I finally found him, someone to understand me. If only I had him. If only I could keep him forever and ever. Wouldn't life be just grand? "Hehe...hehe...ha...hah...hahaha...". I laughed to myself. Was this the very verge of insanity? To think I could have such a precious being as if he was a new toy. Mother and Father would never allow it. "They would never...". My insane smile faded into a frown. "They would never allow the princess to have her prince". I sat up lifelessly, still hugging my pillow. Why? Why can't the princess have her happy ever after? Why not? Because her evil family wouldn't allow it. They would want the youngest princess to have her Cinderella story with no prince and only a life of cinders. Unforgiveable...The only way for Cinderella to have her happy ending was to get rid of the evil. To outsmart them, to make them suffer for denying my happiness. MY happy ending. 

I refuse to continue. I refuse to study with those tutors, I refuse to be picked on by my sister, I refuse to live under my parents for the rest of my life, I refuse to accept an organised marriage with the neighbouring business's son, I refuse to be trapped in my cage until the day I die! I refuse all of it! I hate it! "I hate it! I hate it! Hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE, HATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATE THEM ALL!" I screamed, tossing my pillow to the floor in a fit of anger. Panting, I composed myself slowly, but gradually. I couldn't go on like this. It was impossible. I had to escape. I had to find my prince on my own. Without my parents, without my sister, without a fairy godmother, without any help. It only had to be me. But I couldn't go unprepared. I had to think of a plan. I needed to know exactly where I was going, how I was going to get there and when. This wasn't exactly the right thing to do alone, but I couldn't tell a soul about it. Not a soul! Promise...It was a promise. 

That night, like every night, the dinner table was full of flattery and irrelevance towards my sister. I was almost like the family dog, left to eat from the floor without a single glance my way. Although, our former pet poodle recieved more love than I did. After I played with her we never got another pet ever again. Her skeleton is still lodged in my dresser drawer. "Cheiko, dear, I heard that you were nominated to be a shrine maiden for this years festival this summer". "Yes, mother. I would be more than honoured to do so". "It certainly is an honour. The women in our family have been shrine maidens for years. It's only natural for our precious daughter to be chosen". "Thank you, father". I ate without a word to say. What was the point? I tried many times when I was still a naive child but all attempts failed. I was an outcast, no matter what score I got on a test, no matter what teacher praised me. It didn't matter at all. "Maybe Akira should learn from her big sister and make herself useful for once". "That's right, Akira. Take a page out of your sister's book and stop being a waste of space. That's all you are in this family". Akira. It means 'bright' or 'clear'. The name that I've held for years. The name so ironic that you could even call it laughable. My name...Akira Akuma. Otherwise known in english as...Bright Demon...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh SH*T!


	16. Sheltered But Not Spoiled

Warmth was the first sensation I felt when waking up. Birds chirped outside of my bedroom window and a soft breathing emitted from below. My eyes wandered down to a sleeping Akane, actually wearing her own clothes while in the same bed as me. I rubbed my eyes. Did she just crawl into my bed last night? Well, she did just come over to study and we ended up having a sleepover, of sorts. Lately, Akane has been spacing out, deep in thought. I can never really decipher what she's thinking but it must be serious. During lunch at school I can't help but watch her as she stares out of the window, her nail tapping the desk in a sofy, repetitive rhythm. To me, it felt like the only echoing sound in the classroom as it would go on and on. I place my hand on her back, rubbing it slowly and gently as if petting a cat, which I wouldn't normally do - but you understand the image. "Nn...". Akane groaned, shifting slightly and returning to the waking world. I watched as her fist moved to her eye, turning back and forth as she rubbed the sleep away with a yawn exiting her throat. "Aaaah...Mn...Hm?". Akane lifted herself up, leaning on her elbows, to look at me. Her hair was a mess, some of her bangs hanging over her half lidded eyes. "Oh, good morning, Senpai". Just who are you calling Senpai? She was delirious again. I sighed, patting her head. "Okay, okay". "Hm, I had a dream about you, Senpai. It was so...nice". "You had a...dream about me?" Why was I not surprised? "Hm-hm, about when we first met". Of all things, it was our first meeting? "You were so nice to me. I fell in love with you straight away...". "Is that so?" Akane raised herself up more, stretching her arms up in the air with a stretched groan. "Nn...haah...I love you, Senpai". Akane clumsily leaned into me, pressing her lips on my cheek. Sitting up again, Akane rubbed both eyes. She looked...cute.

"Welp, I'm gonna make breakfast. We can go on a date today right?" How did this conversation move so quickly?! "Uh, sure. Where do you want to go?" "I don't mind. As long as I'm with my Yuuya-bear". "Yuuya-what? H-hey!" Akane quickly wrapped her arms around me, smothering her face into my cheek. "Gah, hey! What is wrong with you?!" "Mmnn...Yuuya~~". Akane giggled. Did she even realise what she was doing? This was suffocating. She was way too excited for the morning. I tried to push her off, but she was stronger than she looked. Akane did eventually relax on my chest but she wordlessly refused to let go of me. I grumble, wanting her to get off of me. I didn't want this affection. It was too much. "Hey, you remember when we first met, right?" "Huh? Yes, I remember". "Remember Kyoto?" "Akane, what are you talking about? I don't..". "I see. Of course you don't remember that time. I know you don't, deep down". "Akane...?" She wasn't making any sense at all. If what she was saying wasn't just her babbling on because she's half-asleep then...could it be that we had met before? In...Kyoto? I didn't remember a lot about those trips during summer. I stopped going with Kurosaki and his parents because of my jobs. Am I forgetting something really important? What was it?! 

Akane sat up again, rubbing her eyes. It seemed like a thought just snapped into her brain as her eyes opened fully. "Ah! Right, breakfast. Are ya comin', mister silly man?" I'm the silly one? Akane crawled out from the futon, clumsily standing up like a drunk person. He staggered to the door in her sleepy state and went out of sight. I rubbed my eyes with a groan. Well, at least there was no school today. I only had work in the evening, again. I stood up from the bed, just as clumsily as Akane. Going out to the main room, I spotted Akane handling a rather big kitchen knife for the vegetables. And my first thought was; 'No, no, no!' I rushed over to her, taking hold of her hand. "Uh? Yuuya? Pfft, whatcha doing, silly pants?" "Uh, I was wondering if I could help. You're clearly incapable of handling a kitchen knife while half-asleep so just let me take care of it". "Oh, it's fine. I'm good with knives". She is probably more capable of killing with them rather than cooking with them. "Not while you're nearly asleep, airhead. Let me cut the vegetables while you make some rice, okay?" "Awww, are you worrying about me?" I'm more worried about getting stabbed, other than that..."Yes, I'm worried. So, please give me the knife". Akane put the knife down feebly, and then it happened. "Ouch...!" Akane jolted, quickly retracting her finger. A single drop of blood formed from her middle finger, running down it slowly. "See? Well, I guess it's partly my fault. Give it here". Akane turned to face me, holding her finger out for me to examine it. "You're such an airhead when you're half-asleep". "Meanie...". "Come on, I have a first-aid in the bathroom".

Akane sat quietly on the bath stool in the bathroom while I cleaned and bandaged her finger. She was like a child that got a paper cut, only more mature. Akane must have woken up from the shock because she sat there with a straight face, her bare legs in a pose that made her knees touch. Such a mature looking young woman getting such childish treatment for a tiny cut. That and her strange way of saying things. "There, all better?" "Not quite". "What do you mean? I fixed it". Akane smirked, holding her finger out to me as if she was expecting me to put a ring on her finger, and we are definitely not going there. "Kiss it better". I frowned. "You have got to be kidding". Akane shook her head. "Of course not. Besides, I'm your girlfriend so it's fine, isn't it? Please". I sighed. Did I have to? No, I didn't. But, what the hell? This relationship was weird enough. I took hold of her hand, placing a kiss on her finger. "There you go, princess. Satisfied?" "Very much so...my prince". The last part was mumbled so I couldn't quite hear it. "What was that?" "Nothing. Nothing at all". I stood up, offering my hand to her. "Heh, a gentleman as always, huh, Yuuya?" "I suppose". Akane took my hand and allowed me to pull her up. "Okay, then, we should continue with breakfast. I'm starving". "Same here. I'll be sure to make a fantastic breakfast". "I bet. I actually quite like your cooking". "Of course you do. I bet you'll love my music skills even more". "What do you mean?" We continued to make breakfast, making up soup and some rice, ect. Akane looked away for a moment. "Well,". She began, pushing her loose strands of hair behind her ear. "I thought of playing for you sometime soon. Uh, I was actually thinking of doing so tonight". "Really? Well, alright. I have work at seven, though. I'll be there until nine, at least". "That's okay, isn't it? I reallywant to play for you, one of my favourites". If she really wanted to I saw no harm in it. "Okay. Tonight, then. Before that and before work we should go out for lunch. I don't feel like making anything today". "So, where do you want to go?" "There's a fast food place down the street. Nothing terrible, they just serve sandwiches". "A...fast food place? I've, uh, never been to one". 

"Wait, really? I rarely go, but I have been at least two or three times. Well, it makes sense since you were born in the countryside. But you never visited the city before?" "No. Daddy used to go on trips with my mother while my sister went on summer vacation, but I wasn't allowed to go. I had to stay home and study. While I was alone, I would stand out on the balcony and play my violin. It felt like I wasn't at home, but somewhere better. I would let my thoughts fly away as I played". It sounded lonely for her, the way she spoke of her family. Heh, I've been in those situations several times. I lost count after a while. Summer, festivals, Christmas. It was all the same. Birthdays, too. "So, let me guess, you're parents leave the house without a word to you, even though you are more than used to it. So you spend the whole summer vacation doing your own thing and taking long walks outside when Christmas comes. When the parents return you only hear of their trip when they are gloating to the neighbours. How did I do? Was I right?" I turned off the stove once I finished talking. Some bad memories came up just then and I couldn't seem to stop myself. Akane looked surprised. "Yes, that...That's exactly it. Hm, we're practically soul mates". "Oh no. Don't go there. That isn't real". "I know. I was kidding". "Wha-...Seriously?" Now I was surprised. "You of all people don't believe in soul mates?" "No. I don't. That stuff is really sappy. I only believe in love at first sight and two people who can be together because they share the same ideals and traits. It has nothing to do with destiny. Yes, I may have thought that in childhood but when I first learned about my parents true beginning, I thought otherwise". "Wow. I'm...speechless right now". "Uh-huh. I think I deserve a kiss". "What for? Ah, what the hell". I gave Akane a kiss on the lips. "Is that to princess's satisfaction?" "Very much so. Now let's serve breakfast already". I didn't believe in soul mates. That stuff is bullshit. But I do believe in strange coincidences. Having such a girl as my girlfriend has to be a coincidence. It has to be. 

Akane and I figured that we could go see a movie before having lunch. It was still technically the morning, so we thought that it couldn't hurt. Plus, the cinema would definitely be open right now, at it's earliest. I waited outside of my bedroom door, waiting for her to change. I had to bring her clothes over again since she couldn't exactly go out in her big t-shirt and...underwear, which I did not see at all. Seriously. My bedroom door opened at last. Akane came out in a sleeveless, navy t-shirt and a matching skirt, along with white stockings and her signature ribbon tied in her hair, which still remained down at her waist. "How do I look?" "You look...haa...You look beautiful, Akane. Now let's get going before we miss the movie". "'Kay...". Akane took hold of my hand as we headed out. Why do I suddenly feel such sincerity when I say that she's beautiful? It doesn't mean anything. Not to me, anyway. 

To my amazement, Akane actually picked a movie that wasn't a sappy romance, but more like a horror movie. I seem to underestimate her more everyday. Akane is strangely unpredictable, aside from sharing the same traits as me. All except the 'love' part. I can't fall in love, nor do I want to. More most of the 'scary' scenes of the movie, Akane held my arm tightly, hiding her face from the screen. Was she really that scared? She was shaking too so..."Akane, it isn't that scary. Please stop clinging onto me". "No. Not until the scary parts are over". I looked to the screen. The scene depicted a young woman hiding under her bed while the floor creaked with the killer's footsteps. I felt a little evil today so, why not? "It's over". "Really...?" Akane slowly uncovered her eyes, suddenly witnessing a jumpscare of the woman being impaled from the top of the bed with a machete. "Gyaah! You meanie pants, Yuuya!" Akane onlynneld my arm tighter, rubbing her face into my biscep. I rolled my eyes, ruffling her hair like she was a child, fretting over nothing but a silly prank. And it really was. Seeing Akane act like that was kind of endearing. How she coward next to me, told me how mean I was being, shaking uncontrollably...God, I really have problems, don't I? The movie ended with having Akane cling to me as the end credits panned down. She was still shaking. "Relax. It's over. Besides, you picked the movie so you only have yourself to blame". "I know, but whenever I'm about to watch a horror or thriller movie, I get really worked up and excited. Then I see the scary scenes and I regret it". "So you never learn from your mistakes, huh?". "Apparently, no". I held Akane's hand and locked fingers with her. "Well, just be reassured that it's over. Besides...I was there for you to hide behind. As stupid as that sounds. I'm gonna shut up now". Akane smiled, squeezing my hand. "What are you smiling for?" "You know why, mister man". 

Lunch was...awkward. As I told Akane, they have a habit of drowning you with questions about your order. Akane stood there, listening to it with a confused and exhausted expression as the woman behind the counter went on and on. She really wasn't used to a place like this. What a princess. In the end, she just got what I got. We sat at our table, Akane appearing discouraged by what just happened. "You okay?" She pouted. I put my drink down. "Look, don't feel down about it. I understand if you're annoyed and a bit embarrassed, but get over it and enjoy lunch. This is my usual so you know that it's good. Go ahead". "Stupid register lady - I'll kill her". "Please don't". I said it casually but I meant it. "Eat up before it gets cold". "F-fine...". Akane took a hesitant bite of her sandwich, soon making a face that I couldn't really put into words. "It's good...". "See...?" "W-well, I shouldn't be suprised. It was recommended by Yuuya, afterall". "And? The only reason that you have the same order as me is because you panicked and couldn't say a word". "That-!...Ahem, Yuuya, sweetie, please don't make me mad. I'm just a little cranky right now". "I'm not surprised. Try and finish lunch and calm down". "Okay...I will. I've really never been to this kind of place before. It's suffocating how I'm not used to it". "You should in time. It's not a big deal. We can go here a few more times or to other fast food places. Preferably one where you can choose your order without being asked too many questions". "That sounds easier". Akane had her hands collected on her lap, her shoulders tense. Was it that hard to relax in here? We were sitting at a booth so I thought I could try something to relax her. "Hey, Akane, slide over here, next to me". "What? Why?" "I want you to relax so maybe you can if we're next to eachother". "Uh, okay...". Akane brought her food over to my side of the table. She sat down next to me, closely. I wrapped my free arm around her waist, feeling her body jolt slightly. "How's that?" Other than the jolt of suprise, Akane relaxed. "M-much better. Thanks". Akane continued to eat her lunch with pink on her cheeks. She didn't look at me through her bashfulness. Her hand also overlapped mine, giving it a squeeze.

That very evening a blackout occurred just as Akane and myself were settling at her house. Everything became dark, all aside from the sky. Because now it was filled with stars. "A blackout now? Interesting". "This is as good a time as any. Come on, Yuuya. We're going to the balcony". Akane took hold of my hand, leading me from the sofa and to the balcony. I couldn't exactly see Akane's figure through the darkness, but she was definitely there. The trinket from her necklace shimmered as the wood of her violin did. I sat down on the chair provided, for me to sit and listen quietly as she would play her violin. The wood shone in the darkness as it rested on her shoulder and under her chin. She held the bow with her delicate fingers, holding them to the strings. Akane remained quite herself. And then it began. A slow but beautiful tune along the instrument's strings. I listened to it. The quiet music that blocked out any other sound on the outside. I leaned forward in my chair, really listening to her talent. I watched Akane's hair sway as her body shifted. Her expression was unreadable due to the blackout. But I knew that she played with sincerity in her eyes, with concentration. She would have taken her practice seriously. There was no note sheet, no instructions. Only Akane and her violin. I had never seen her under such a beautiful spotlight. What was I thinking? Honestly, I didn't know myself. All I knew was that Akane's musical talent gained the attention from the building across the street. Several windows were open and several neighbours stuck their head out to listen as well. Akane didn't see them. She only saw me. The tune faded into silence as she finished, giving me a bow. I had to clap for her, at least. "How was it?" Akane asked, standing straight again. "Wonderful. That's quite a talent, Akane. I'm impressed". "I'm glad. I've been practising for so long. I've always wanted someone who wasn't my tutor to hear it". 

Akane set her instrument down onto the ground as she sat next to it, bringing her knees up to her chest. I moved thhe chair aside so I could sit with her. She sighed. "Haa...For so many years, I've had to be a certain someone. I had to follow certain rules to act, talk and walk a certain way. All because of...the way I am. Both my parents thought of my sister as 'little miss perfect'. In front of my parents, she did nothing wrong. But I knew. I knew that she skipped studying to go out with her friends, how she bullied me for fun. And I had to live in fear that my parents would kick me out before I turned eleven". I said nothing this entire time. Why ruin it now? "That's why I...left. I needed to find something else - something better. Something to take away the loneliness and the fact that I was sheltered. And then I did". Akane looked to me with a smile. "I found you, Yuuya. The love of my life. My sweet prince". My cheek was caressed by Akane's delicate hand. Her thumb ran along my cheek bone and back. With some shifting, Akane soon sat right beside me, leaning her head against my arm. "Now I'm free. I flew away from my cage and found my nest. Hm...I've never been happier". "I know, Akane. Around me, you're always happy. When we're alone, anyway. But...I still can't quite comprehend why. Why me of all people? It can't just be because we're alike". "I...I can't tell you. I'm sorry. You might as well give up until I gain enough courage to tell you, though I'm not sure when that will be". "Very well. Stay secretive". "I will". For a short while, I stared out into the stars, leaning both hands on the stone slabs behind me. Until the power came back, we would just sit and watch the stars while they were still visible. While we could still appreciate them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry. I couldn't come up with anything for now so this is all I've got. But I'm thinking of something very interesting for the next chapter. I just hope it goes well and that the timing isn't bad. Until next time, I'm gonna take a short break.


	17. Strong Heart, Weak Body

Summer vacation was beginning in a week. I needed time off school to work for extra hours, anyway. Besides that, Akane would want us to spend as much time as possible together. I still haven't told her that I love her. I don't love her. The only feelings that I have for Akane is fondness. She is a very strange girl with a fascinating personality. She's smart, beautiful, wonderfully weird, but I feel anything towards her but love. I couldn't really call her a lover, with that in mind. Akane is my...girlfriend. I'm her boyfriend. She loves me, I don't feel the same. That's how it is. We kiss, hold hands and go on dates, but that is as far as it has went. Would I like to be for intimate with her? As a man, wouldn't it be normal to want that? I would be lying if I said that I didn't want to, recently, anyway. When I see Akane as a mature young woman, then yes. I would like to be more intimate with her. But thinking about her childish side makes me think of her as more of a little sister than as a woman. It's odd how her personality can change within a single mood swing.

I arrived at her apartment building on a Sunday afternoon. We agreed to study with eachother starting now until the middle of summer vacation. I brought plenty of useful materials for notes. I announced myself with a knock at her apartment door...No answer. I tried again...Nothing. I knew that she was in her apartment, so why was there no answer? "Akane? Are you there?" Something wasn't right. I tried opening the door, suprised to find that it was unlocked. She really was still in the apartment. I rushed in, immediately stopping when I found her. My eyes widened and my heart skipped a beat from shock. "A-Akane...!" 

Akane lay on the floor, unconscious. Her cheeks were red and her chest was heaving rapidly. Quickly slipping off my shoes, I hurried to her side, crouching down to examine her. I lifted her limp body in my arms. Akane's skin felt hot to the touch. Sweat covered her body, she was trembling as if trapped in a frozen lake. Shifting back her sticky bangs, I felt her forehead. Her face was just as hot as the rest of her fragile body. "Akane, can you hear me? Akane!" There was no reply. Though breathing, the girl in my arms was in a state of deep unconsciousness from her condition. "Damn it...". I carried her in my arms, her head falling into my chest. Taking her to the bedroom, I lay her down on the bed. I had to call a doctor. This was something that I wouldn't be capable of handling without professional assistance. The least I could do until the doctor arrived was to get her fever down. That was the plan. So I picked up the phone and dialed the number for the local doctor. I doubted that an ambulance was needed for something like this. A doctor would have to be enough. 

While waiting for help to arrive, I filled a bowl with cold water, placing a few icecubes inside. With a cloth, I soaked it in the ice cold water and placed it over Akane's forehead. Her face was so red with exhaustion and her fever. I never saw her look so weak. Unconsciously I reached out to brush my knuckles gently on her cheek. A bead of sweat slid down her temple, meeting my index finger, almost like a warm tear. Was I...worrying about her? Is this what it feels like to worry about another human being? I felt a strange stir in my heart when I thought of the very word. I found her hand, holding it protectively. I wasn't sure why. It just happened without an explanation. Akane's breathing had appeared to have calmed down, although her chest still heaved almost breathlessly. She was wearing a loose t-shirt so I doubted that she was suffocating. If she was wearing a tighter ahirt then she may have stopped breathing by now. Within a few breaths, I could hear wheezing, every now and then, a cough erupted. Akane must have had asthma. She never said a word about it. This looked serious, more serious than just running out of breath after running. Akane's lips were blue, though she was burning up. This was a genuine feeling of concern for another human life. I couldn't quite comprehend it, but I didn't want to feel that way. I knew that much. 

The doctor arrived thirty minutes after I called. She asked about symptoms and when I found her and so on. With those questions asked, all that was left was for the doctor to look over Akane and to hopefully help her. Gah, why did I say that? I waited outside of the room patiently, waiting for the doctor to come back through and tell me a diagnosis and what I should do for her. "Well, doctor? How is she?" "It's an asthma attack, a rather serious one". The doctor said, storing her equipment back in her bag. "She should be fine as long as she gets plenty of rest. Although it's serious, she won't have to stay in bed forever. Keep an eye on her. I suggest keeping her hydrated when she wakes up. If she has another fit, I highly impose that you call an ambulance. This was the exception. Has she never told you of her condition?" I shook my head. "No. Not a word". "She probably wouldn't want you to worry. Asthma can start of in childhood, but it can come back later on in life". "Akane does sport without any difficulties, so her condition has never been obvious". "Like I said, it can start off during child and eventually stop. But there's always a chance that it can return in the form of an attack during adult years". "I see. Thank you, doctor". "You're welcome, young man. Take good care of her. If you would like more information then you can look it up on our website or in one of our doctor's medical book". "Yes, thank you, again". I saw the doctor out, sighing. Akane shoukd have said something sooner about her condition. I couldn't understand why she wouldn't tell me. It's not like I would freak out about it. I would be more prepared for it, instead. 

Returning to the bedroom, Akane appeared to be fast asleep now. She looked more peaceful than before, a blanket draped over her body. Although, her lips looked cracked and her clothes were still stained with sweat. Don't tell me I had to...Well, I couldn't leave her like that. As well as asthma, she was at risk of a cold too. I had to be serious about it. I could simply change her under the covers and not see a thing. So I gathered some loose clothing and changed her without seeing a thing. It may have been difficult to guid my hands without seeing or accidentally touching anything but I managed somehow with her bottom half. Next was her top half. Guiding my hands again, I took hold of her shirt, raising it up slowly, as not to disturb her. Little did I notice that Akane's eyes were half lidded and looking up at me. I froze, still holding her shirt. "Akane, y-you're awake". "Mn...Yuuya...?". I let go of her clothing, paying more attention to her throaty voice. "Mm...Yuuya, is it...really you?" "Yeah. I'm right here". Akane gave a weak smile. I guess that she didn't realise that I was changing her clothing. "D-don't...leave me alone, okay? Please...I don't want...to be alone...again". "What are you talking about?" Akane didn't answer my question. She kept speaking. "I love you, Yuuya...so, so much...Hm...Don't ever leave...". Akane was in a daze but her words sounded sincere. She weakly held my hand, unable to squeeze it. Her eyes closed and she fell back into sleep. Her body curled up, her hand still overlapping mine. I had no choice but to let go of it. "I still have to change you, idiot". I placed a quick kiss on her head before slowly getting up from the floor to continue my task. 

With dry clothing on, I decided to change her bed as well. It would be pointless to change her clothes and then let her rest on damp and uncomfortable bedding. And that was that. I lay her back onto her clean bed, pulling a sheet over her body, taking the liberty to change her cloth as well. I knew that Akane would be grateful for this. I assumed that it was in her nature when it involved me, the man she loves unconditionally for whatever reason that has not yet been explained. Not to me, anyway. I ran my hand gently over her hair, guiding my finger to the nape of her neck. Akane moaned, sounding worn out. Exhausted, even. The asthma attack must have drained her body of all energy. But I couldn't imagine such an active girl with asthma. Coughing, wheezing, shortage of breath and so on. I guess you can never tell what a person is like just by witnessing their outward actions. I would know. I'm underestimated every single day because of my natural looks and active build. How I talk to people, my grades. People only see those things without ever knowing someone's true thoughts and feelings. Akane was like me, I suppose. Hiding behind a mask because others, even your own family, can't comprehend your feelings. My hand travelled down Akane's arm, exploring the feeling of her slim figure. I shortly retracted my hand. I didn't want to disturb her anymore. Akane needed to rest. I stood from the bed, heading towards the main area to give Akane peace. Gently I closed the door, hearing the soft creaks of the hinges, and the click of the door shutting. All was quiet. When she would wake up, I could make her something to eat and prepare a glass of cold water. I would need to stay with her for a while before I'm confident that she could even stand up on her own. That meant taking time off of school for at least two days. Akane should be okay to take care of herself by then, even for a few hours. I would have to figure out the details soon enough. 

Only an hour after I put Akane to bed did I begin to prepare a bowl of rice porridge for her. Her breathing was normal and her fever had gone down, so I thought that she would wake up soon. That's what I considered happening. Door hinges creaked from behind me, followed by bare feet walking across bare wood flooring. These footsteps were quite slow. Without looking back I spoke to Akane softly. "What are you doing? Go back to bed immediately. Rest is the best thing for you right now, so why not-...". I stopped speaking when my body jerked a bit. A pair of arms wrapped around my stomach from behind, a warm face smothering into my back. This situation wasn't only confusing but crowded as well. Akane gripped my shirt, her smothering moving up to the top half of my back. "Yuuya, you smell really...good". "Akane, I'm serious. Go back to bed". "I wanted to see you". "I don't care. I'm telling you this for your own good". "Are you worrying about me that much?" I couldn't hold back a blush, but I could certainly hide it. "Not really. It's just a bother having to deal with you when we're supposed to be studying". I couldn't see it but I could sense a smile on Akane's cracked lips. "Thank you....for worrying about me". "...". I didn't respond. Hearing Akane's sweet words made my heart jump. It hurt my chest. I couldn't have that. I gently took Akane's hands from my waist, turning around to carry her back to bed. She had to go back and rest before she would have a coughing fit. The red in her cheeks and the dark circles under her eyes were more than evident for that. "Wrap your arms around my neck. Looks like I'm carrying you again". Akane obliged without arguing. I hooked my arm under her legs to carry her, wrapping my other arm around her back for support. Akane leaned her head under my chin, holding tightly onto my shirt. "See? You're worried enough to carry me back to bed". "No. This is because I don't trust you to walk back without collapsing". "Cockadoodie head...". She didn't have enough strength to walk but had enough strength to call me by one of her ridiculous phrases? I handle Akane, slipping her back into bed. Her feet were slightly blue from the cold. I tucked the sheets tightly under the mattress to keep her warm. "Try not to fall asleep right now because I made rice porridge for you. When you have eaten, you can sleep again". "Mn...Alright". "Good girl...". I gave her head a soft pat, almost mockingly at her behaviour, but it went by as disregarded. Leaving her, I went back to the kitchen to finish what I was doing before the stove went on fire. 

Akane took her time to eat, showing without words that she wasn't very hungry. "The least you could do is drink some water. I have to insist that you keep yourself hydrated". Akane smiled weakly at me. "I will. Oh, and I really like the porridge. It's delicious, but I can't seem to find my appetite". "That's okay. Just as long as you have eaten something and that you drink your water. I've also brought some medicine for your fever. Have it once you've finished eating, okay?" I received a brief nod. "Good. Hopefully you can do these things yourself while I'm at work or school". "I will. Being immobilised only lasts for a couple of days". "Another thing, why didn't you tell me that you has asthma?" Akane feebly put her spoon down in her half-eaten bowl of rice porridge. She didn't look up at me as she explained. "Why would I? I thought that I was one of the lucky ones and that I wouldn't have another attack. I'm an athletic girl. I haven't so much as coughed since my first recovery". "So you thought that there would be no point in telling me?" Akane shook her head. "I also ddidn't want to burden you with worry". "Who's worrying? I'm not worrying about you". Akane perked her attention up towards me when I said such a straightforward, and partially dishonest, thing without flinching. "I think that you would be fine, but you would be a lot better if you just told me in the first place. Moron". Akane held a face of surprise, eventually fading into a soft smile. Nothing was said back to me. Akane continued to weakly eat and drink without a word, just a smile. Obviously she saw right through me. 

I was worried about her. I was worried, but in a stronger way. I was worried that she would collapse again, but I knew that she would be okay afterwards. "Akane...". I sat down on the bed, away from the chair that I sat on previously. I wrapped and arm around Akane, holding her close and placing a kiss on her head. Get better soon, okay?" I felt Akane's warm hand on my hand, squeezing the fingers. "I will". Was I mad? Or was I just going soft on her?


	18. Jealousy Bares It's Fangs

Akane's condition had gotten better over time. To be precise, she was able to get out of bed within a week. The doctor stopped by a second time to examine her current condition and was pleased to say that she was recovering. That it would stay that way if she rested and took her prescriptions on time. I hardly went to my apartment within that week, as I was busy making sure that my girlfriend had not burned the entire complex down. I went out of my way to make her proper meals and to generally babysit her. The only times that I visited my apartment was to pick up my mail from the old postal storage in the buildings lobby. I couldn't even sleep in my own bed. That was incase Akane had an attack while she slept. So far, that hasn't happened once, but I suppose that it's better to be safe that sorry. Guh...I sounded like my sister then, how sickening. Why do I have to have most of my nitpicking habits from her? But...I guess that it's true, looking at Akane's situation. 

Throughout the week I have been in a commitment. A routine. In the morning, I wake up with Akane, make her breakfast, run a bath for her and leave for school once I'm confident that she's settled and resting. I leave her a ready made lunch in the fridge that she usually has to heat up in the microwave. When I return to her apartment, I make dinner for us both, study, take a bath and then go to bed. This routine makes it sound like I'm looking after a younger sibling with an illness, rather than my girlfriend. Akane has a habit of acting younger than she is. Heh, in a strange way, I find it quite endearing. Since she became sick we haven't been very 'romantic'. Although, I could never imagine having a 'romantic' relationship with her in the first place. We're too alike to be a generic couple. Almost as if I'm kissing a best friend or a twin. Recently the most kissing that we have done is a light peck on the lips or a light peck on the cheek. There is obviously no passion in our relationship, inspite of Akane's 'undying love' for me. I can't stress enough how ridiculous it sounds. To be in love means devotion and loyalty to one person, which, realistically speaking, is very rare in the world. Love is a fickle thing that I may never empathise with, but I can at least understand how fragile it must be, like trust and honesty. It is something that can easily break from simple, but hurtful, words. I may not comprehend the feeling but I find it rather fascinating how such emotion can break people. Such an emotion called love could break anyone. Sons, daughters, siblings, parents, lovers. Akane Hayashi is as fragile as love itself. From observing her, listening to how she talks about her family and about me is enough evidence to clarify just how fragile she is, at heart and of mind. If I ever told her the truth, I can imagine how she would break. She would shatter like paper thin glass, scattering into a million tiny pieces, never to be fixed again.

It was an amusing theory, I have to say. I would be lying if I said that it wouldn't at least make me tempted to tell her. But no. I had to bite my tongue through the ordeal of being in this relationship. The routine continued. Only my senses became whole around the time that I was slipping on my shoes, ready to leave school for the day. My attention snapped back when a particular occurrence created a fissure in the usual routine. I tapped the point of my shoe to the floor twice, securing it onto my foot. Upon closing my locker for the day, among many other students who didn't have club activities, I heard a hesitant voice approach me. Obviously female. "Um...". Just the nervousness in her voice caught my attention. I shifted my gaze to them, them being Kirisaki. She stared down at her feet, her arms cradling herself as if for protection. That's textbook psychology. "Kirisaki? What is it?" I pretended to care, as I usually did. Kirisaki's head shot up to look at me, finally. "Oh, um...H-hello, Yuuya. Hehe, I was just wondering i-if you were planning anything tomorrow". "Tomorrow? No, it's a school day so I'll be studying then". "S-see, that's the thing. I'm really struggling with our studies on English. I heard that you're really fluent. I keep getting my R's and L's mixed up. Textbook mistake, huh?" Kirisaki is usually a calm and confident girl, but around me she turns into a giggly airhead. Helping her wouldn't hurt, though. It would be rude if I said no. I would have to sort something out with Akane and try to explain why I'll be late tomorrow. With a lie, of course. I had the feeling that she would lose her mind the moment that I put Kirisaki's name into a sentence. 

"Of course I'll help. But it does have to be tomorrow. You can come to my apartment if you would like". That way I can be close to Akane if something happens. "Wait, y-you're apartment?" "Yes. Is that a problem?" "N-n-no...No, it isn't. Nevermind. That sounds perfect. Well, not perfect b-but, uh...um...I'll see you tomorrow!" With that Kirisaki ran out of the door like a dog with its tail between its legs. I rolled my eyes. 

Before going back to Akane's apartment, I bought some groceries for dinner. It was like living with her. Well, I kind of lived with her - but temporarily. It was just until she was better. I could never live with someone else. Never again. I arrived at the apartment, the door open for me as it was all week. I set the grocery bags down on the counter. The T.V was on at a random channel. The figure of Akane sat up from the sofa. She groaned, gesturing her hand to her eye in a rubbing motion. A yawn escaped her lips. "You shouldn't be sleeping on the sofa. You could catch a cold". Normal greetings were a little mundane around us. Some advice was fine for today. Akane turned her head to face me, looking groggy. "Nn? Oh, hi, Yuuya. Mn, I didn't mean to sleep on the sofa. I was waiting for you to come home". "Then wait for me while tucked in under layers of sheets. Don't sleep half naked on the sofa without a blanket. Anyway, I bought some ingredients for a stir fry and some ice-cream for later". "Aww, you're so good to me". I didn't reply. Instead of answering her silly comment, I turned on the stove and set up the utensils and ingredients. "Go back to bed for now. I'll call you when it's finished". "But stir fry only takes ten minutes". I heard the soft tapping of bare feet on hardwood flooring, approaching me. My eyebrow twitched. "Akane...". It was like scolding a disobedient child. Akane simply giggled like one, wrapping her arms around me in her drowsy condition. "Haa...Akane, get off of me". "Do you just want to get rid of me?" "Yes...". "Poopie-head. That's mean". "I know it is. Now go back to bed". Akane was being obedient this time, letting go of me. "Can I stay, though? I'll wear a blanket if it makes you feel better". "I don't know what you mean by that, but fine. As long as you're covered up and warm". "Will do". The tapping began again, only growing distant. It was a relief, honestly. When Akane is groggy from sleep she is more trouble than she usually is. Maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration. She's childish and easily jealous, but she doesn't cause me a lot of trouble. When she's fully awake, anyway. 

The soft tapping was no longer there, even when Akane came back to the kitchen. A large blanket was draped over her body, a pair of white socks covering her feet and delicate toes. Yet, why...were her legs still bare?! "It was too much of a bother to put on pants". It wasn't a question, but more of a sarcastic statement. Akane glanced at me innocently. "I can only sleep in my underwear". "Are you alseep now?" Again, sarcasm. "Do you not like it?" "No, I don't. You've been in your underwear all week. What's wrong with wearing pajama bottoms?" "They're uncomfortable". They don't look uncomfortable. "What about you, mister smart guy? You wear boxers to bed, without pants". "I wear them sometimes. Besides, shouldn't you have more decency than that?" "I don't mind if it's you". Is it just me or has Akane grown more confident around me? No, better yet, she's become more shameless. "Look, let's just drop this conversation. It's getting out of hand, like all of our conversations". "And who usually starts those conversations? Huh, mister smart guy?" I rolled my eyes, ignoring her. "Hm. Rude". There was scraping of a kitchen table chair behind me. Akane had sat down quietly while I finished off dinner. "The least you could do is to set the table". "Fine. I will. If you ask nicely". I grumbled. "Mm...Please, Akane". "Absolutely. Count on me". The chair lightly scraped again. Before actually setting the table, Akane pressed her cold lips to my cheek. The usual passionless gesture. We haven't kissed properly in quite a while that it's like we're not a couple anymore. I guess that I shouldn't worry about it. Why should I? I'm not a very romantic person. So taking the initiative and doing something about it isn't really in my character. 

Akane's lips curved upwards after taking the first bite of dinner. "Mmm...It's really good. You're really good at cooking, Yuuya". "I've had better". "Meaning...?" "Do you know Emi Urabe from school? She's very talented when it comes to cooking. Especially baking". "Huh, I see". Akane held the tip of her chopsticks to her lips in thought, staring down at her bowl of noodles. Don't tell me that she's jealous. "However," I began again in an attempt to put her mind at ease. "I think that your cooking is still better, Akane. It has a certain quality that makes all of your dishes seem like comfort foods". "Don't just say that". "I'm not. I'm honestly complimenting you". Akane's smile appeared again, as if she was satisfied with what I said. "I was wondering, Akane. Summer break is coming around in two weeks. Everyone I know is going on trips with their families. I saved up quite a bit of money from work, so I thought that we could go somewhere together. Somewhere like Tokyo or Sapporo. Anywhere, as long as I can afford it". "How about...Kyoto?" Akane's voice was a little lifeless as she said that. I was a little puzzled from the suggestion. "Why Kyoto? There are many amazing cities in Japan, so why go to the countryside?" "I just...would like to go someday. Is that a problem?" "No. It's not. Kyoto is a beautiful place, I was just wondering why you would want to go". "No special reason. And you're right. It is naturally beautiful. I guess that I want to go for the summer festival being held there. We could visit the shrine and watch the fireworks. It'll be fun". I considered the ridiculous theory that Akane's expressions were bipolar. One minute she would look quite serious about certain topics, and then smile brightly as if pushing past memories aside. "I'll even wear my yukata for the festival. So, could we go, please?" "Sure. We can go near the end of summer break, when the festival takes place. Take a day for that and maybe two other days for sightseeing". "Really? I'm glad. I heard that Kyoto is very gorgeous in the summer. I can't wait. And I should be all better by then". Then it was settled. I think I would have enough to stay for at least three nights, including train expenses. "Alright, then. Kyoto it is. Now, eat up before it gets cold". 

During the evening, Akane sat back in bed with her small tub of chocolate ice-cream. Scooping up small spoonfuls with the tiny spoon provided. I sat with her, looking over the thermometer that just took her temperature. Things were still normal. "Hopefully you should get better by the end of the week". "I will. I should be back in school by then. I have a lot of catching up to do". "I'm sure that you're smart enough, anyway. Even if you do study without sleep, I'm sure that you'll do well in any exam that comes your way. Don't take that as advice to not study". "Don't worry. I'll study". I patted her head softly. "Good. By the way, I'm coming in later tomorrow". "How come?" "Work. I have to cover for someone for another hour or two". "Well, that's not fair. Tell them that you can't". "I'm sorry, Akane. It can't be helped. But don't worry. It's just an extra hour. I'll be back before dark". Akane shed an expression of disappointment and understanding, holding the tub of ice-cream in her hands without touching it. There was no need to get upset over it. It really wouldn't be that long. Although I lied, I was telling the truth when I said that it would only be an hour. I don't plan to keep Kirisaki in my apartment for a long time. I'll also have to walk her to the station, at least. So it'll be a little over an hour. No more than that. 

I went to school in the morning, leaving a lunch for Akane like I did. At the end of the day, I brought Kirisaki to my apartment for studying. She looked around, almost in astonishment as Akane did when she first stepped inside my apartment. We sat down at the katsu, looking over the study materials that I had for English. I looked over words and phrases with her and helped her to take notes. "Do you understand the basics now?" "Yeah. Thank you, Yuuya. You really helped a lot. I couldn't have done it without you". "Nonsense. You only needed a little push. We could go over some more complicated phrases next time". I looked over the clock hanging on my wall. It had been just under an hour since we began. "Could we continue this another time?" "S-sure. How about tomorrow afternoon?" "That sounds fine. Come along. I'll walk you to the station". "Re-really?! I mean, thank you, I think that I'll be alright". "No. I should be a gentleman and walk you there". "Oh, well, if you insist". A light blush covered Kirisaki's cheeks. I took her out of the apartment, walking her to the station, like I said I would. On the way, she made conversation. "So, uh, how's Hayashi-san? I haven't seen her at school in a while". "She's just a little sick. She should come back by the end of the week". "That's good. I hope that she gets better quickly". If only you knew, Kirisaki. Just then my cellphone went off. I checked the caller ID. It was Akane. Of course it was. I answered it. "Hello...?" ["Uh, hey, Yuuya, sweetie. Are you almost finished with work?"] "Yeah. I'll be there soon". ["Okay, good. H-how was work?"] "It was okay, as per usual". "I see. So, you're heading back now?"] "Uh, yes". I had the sudden urge to look over my shoulder. ["..."] Silence. "Are you still there?" I was beginning to feel anxious by her her silence. ["Well, okay. I'll see you back home. I look forward to dinner tonight!"] "I bet. Um, I'll see you then". ["O-okay. And, um, Yuuya?"] "Yeah...?" ["...I love you"] "I know. Good bye". We both hung up. There's no way she could have seen us, not in her condition. So why was I paranoid about this? In a strange way, it was like cheating on Akane. The scenario for it was kind of right. A lack of passion and romance in current relationship, has a fling with another woman without current girlfriend knowing and so on. But that wasn't it at all. Akane, the way she spoke over the phone, suddenly made it feel that way. 

"Well, I'll see you tomorrow, Kirisaki. Will you be okay on the way home?" "Yep. I'll be fine. Thanks again for helping me. I look forward to it tomorrow". "What...?" "Ah, nothing! Nothing at all! W-well, bye". And then she ran off again, towards the station platform. Once again, I rolled my eye, walking away from the scene. I had to go home and change. 

I came back to Akane's apartment in different clothes. I don't go to work in my uniform so it would be obvious that I lied. The door was open for me, like it always was. I looked over the main room of the apartment. Akane wasn't there. Perhaps she was in bed, sleeping. Yeah, that was probably it. Quietly, I checked the bedroom, slowly sliding the door open. Peering inside, I could see Akane's sleeping form under a pile of two sheets. Somehow, it put my mind at ease. I approached her, sitting next to her on the edge of the bed. She was lying on her back, breathing deeply in her deep sleep. It was quite a sight. Akane's lips were slightly parted, her eyelashes looking longer than ever. Her cheeks were slightly pink, her hair messy. The sheets that covered her were astray, lowered down to her waistline. She probably moved around in her sleep. Her stomach was exposed to me, revealing her bellybutton, which is one of the cutest things about Akane's appearance. I shook my head with a smile, taking the covers to pull over her body for warmth. But, as I did, I stopped myself when I noticed something peculiar. I lowered the sheets back down to her waist, reaching to her stomach. Or, to be precise, her side. Her side was marked with a dull scarring. A vertical line that spiked outwards in some places. By the purplish tone it looked fairly recent, as it wasn't faded. I brushed my finger down the scar, wondering how she received it, when she received it, why. It was warm to the touch, the sensation somehow numb to me as it separated itself from the rest of her creamy, soft skin. It resembled something of...a stab wound. 

"Haah...!" I suddenly jolted when I felt my wrist being grabbed and when I heard a gasp emit from Akane. She sat up in shock, panting and wheezing like she just woke up from an all too realist nightmare. She was grabbing my wrist so hard that it hurt a little bit. I decided to comfort her, playing innocent and pretending that I didn't see her scar. I placed my free hand on her arm, looking directly at her face. "Hey, calm down. Ssh, Akane. It's just me". Akane's bangs of black hair covered her eyes as she panted. She slowly and gradually raised her head to look at me as I spoke to her in a reassuring voice. "Yu-Yuuya...?" "Yes. It's me. Relax. You're okay". I definitely seemed to reassure her and calm her down. To top it off, I held her close to my chest in a hug, petting the back of her hair. "Are you alright now?" I felt a nod against my shoulder. "Okay, then". I pulled away, still keeping my hands on her arms. "I...I had a bad dream". "Don't worry. You're awake now. I'm sorry for not being able to come back sooner. I'm going to start dinner in a moment". "R-right. Of course". Akane forced a smile. It wasn't convincing, especially not to me. So I ran my fingers through her hair from the side, gaining her attention. "Yuuya...?" Her voice trembled, like someone who was holding back tears. It must have been a traumatic nightmare. "Akane, I...Oh, forget it". I then leaned in to press our lips together for a proper kiss. My eyes closed over as I embraced it, the sensation of Akane's cold lips. Her face felt cold and warm at the same time. A new fever had emerged, but not due to illness. Akane was both surprised and embarrassed. It was the first real kiss that we had for quite a while. I wanted to take it to the next level. Before I did, Akane pulled away from the kiss, her cheeks red. "Y-Yuuya, what are you doing? I'm sick". "It's fine. I have a strong immune system. And I haven't kissed you like this in a while". "Yuuya...". Akane gave in, allowing me to kiss her again. But this time, I was a little more...aggressive. I parted Akane's lips with my tongue, pushing it past them and meeting her tongue. Our lips moulded together and all I could feel in Akane's body was intensity. She gripped the back of my hair, pulling it slightly and making me groan in slight pain. As if possessed, I lowered Akane down onto her back. She didn't resist. I wasn't planning on doing...anything that would be too much. So far I was just kissing her with the passion that we never really had in the first place. I felt her lips heat up. The heat had risen only a little within the situation and I found myself in an almost animalistic mindset. I played with her tongue aggressively, revelling in the sensations and the rush of kissing her. The animalistic side that emerged from this was practically begging me to use my hands in some way. But I had more control than that. I didn't want to take things too far. It would have been too much for Akane, surely. 

I retracted my lips slowly, feeling a slight burn from her slightly cracked lips and the wer saliva string that connected us. I pulled away further until that broke. I panted heavily. Akane panted, too, her chest heaving as if she had ran for miles. That made sense, due to her condition. "Haah...haa...That was...um...I...". I wasn't able to form a proper sentence. My cheeks and lips were hot, my breath heavy. Akane's fingers were still tangled in my hair. I averted my gaze from hers, only to have my hot cheek caressed and guided back for our eyes to meet once again. We didn't say a word to eachother. Not in those few moments of staring and after feeling. I closed my lips, almost struggling to keep them closed as I was prepared to kiss her again. "Yuuya, I...I have to ask. Why are you...kissing me so suddenly?" The silence broke with that question. I sat up, Akane following as she sat up to. I kept my legs underneath me and collected my hands in my lap. Akane continued to speak. "Did you feel so...distant from me that you wanted to kiss me?" "Wait, what?" I wasn't really expecting that. I didn't know what to expect from Akane. "Ever since I got sick, we haven't been intimate with eachother. That was the first real kiss that we've had in a long time. I thought that I was being a bit of a bother for you". Couples really do think alike. "Yuuya, I have to know one other thing. Did you lie to me about the extra hour you spent at work?" I felt tense, but I didn't show it physically. "What do you mean?" Was she...No. There was no way that she could know. So, then..."Did you take an extra hour on your own...to distance yourself from me?" "What...?" Now that was definitely unexpected. That was a different kind of paranoia. "Akane, that isn't the case at all. I really took an extra hour to cover for someone. That's it. I wouldn't distance myself from you. And, I don't have a lot of problems when taking care of you, honest". Akane's expression softened. She didn't look so concerned anymore. "O-okay. Sorry. I'm just being silly". I felt relief that the subject was cleared up. Looks like she didn't suspect anything else, how could she think that in the first place? "Uh, I'm going to start dinner now. Stay here, okay?" "Okay...". I gave Akane a kiss on the forehead before going back into the main room. What a relief. I could give Akane the same excuse tomorrow, I suppose. One more day couldn't hurt. 

Akane's POV 

I watched Yuuya walk into the main rooms, momentarily looking back at me with a smile. It made my heart race. Seeing how mature he had gotten since we first met. He looks like a god now. I knelt on the bed, my legs underneath me. Placing my fingers on my lips, I could still feel the moisture and the heat. I licked them, savouring Yuuya's sweet taste. "Haa...Yuuya...". I found myself muttering his name from time to time with his gorgeous face in my mind. One day he would fall in love with me, then we would make love. I would officially become his and he would be all mine. No one would take him away from me again. At that thought, a distant buzzing rang out near the end of the bed. A cellphone. Yuuya's cellphone. Someone sent a text to him. I should give it to him. It's his phone, his privacy. I reached for the device, suddenly halting when the buzzing ceased. It made me think; what if it was someone else? What if it was a girl? Or that dirty-birdie Kirisaki-chan? I wouldn't be able to contain my curiosity now that it was in my head. I decided to do it, to look. If it was Kurosaki I would leave it and tell Yuuya when he came back. If it was Miss Dirty-birdie... I flipped open his cellphone, my eyes widening as I saw the message. [Hi, Yuuya. Thank you for today. I feel kinda bad so I owe you, a lot. I actually look forward to tomorrow, too. I've never been in your apartment before so it was a little weird. Anyway, I'll see you by the lockers again tomorrow. Okay?] My hand trembled as I held the cellphone in my hand. Who...Who does she think she is?! How dare she! "You...You dirty-birdie. Y-Yuuya would never...He would never...betray me for a dirty little birdy like you! I'll...I'll...". I was possessed with anger and hatred. This feeling was very familiar. It has always been there, boiling in my blood and my mind, ready to pounce and turn into physical actions. And for HER to try and take Yuuya away from me...Unacceptable! Unforgiveable! "Stupid...Stupid, stupid, stupid!" I growled these words, my fingers working on their own. [Of course. I'll meet you there]. Send. I then deleted her sent text and the text I just sent. "Hm...haha...hahahaha....hah....hah...hahahahahaha...heheheh..hahahahahahah". This feeling...it returned. It was finally back. "Hahaha...Well, Kirisaki-chan...I hope you have fun tomorrow. It'll be even more fun when I come over there and bash your pretty little face into the wall. In other words...I'll kill you...I'll kill you...hehe...I'm going to kill you...hahaha...You're gonna die!" It was so incredibly hilarious and heartbreaking at the same time. But once Kirisaki was out of the way...Yuuya would be all mine. All mine! He's mine...Mine! Hahahahaha! Ahahahaha....!

Kizami's POV 

I met Kirisaki by the lockers just like yesterday. She looked more cheerful and a little less embarrassed to be with me. Perhaps yesterday helped with her confidence. Just like yesterday, we looked over some more materials. I practiced English with her until she managed to pronounce each word that I said. "Okay, next. Say; 'Temporary'". "Th-that's a hard one!" "I know. The English language is difficult to grasp, but you get used to it. 'Temp-o-rary'". "Temp-o-rary'". "There, see? You got it". "I really did, huh?" Kirisaki giggled. I suppose that this was nice once in a while. Kirisaki wasn't a terrible character, just naive. "Do you think that I can pass English, Yuuya?" "That depends on you. Go in there with a confident mind and charge at it head on. If you try your best with confidence then you may receive a fair result. But that requires a balance of hard work and confidence". "Thank you, Sensei". "Don't call me that. It's a little awkward". "Sorry...". There was a silence. Kirisaki's cheeks turned a little red before she spoke up once more. "Hey, Yuuya...". "Yeah? What is it?" "I...I really...I like you". I wasn't surprised by her statement. I knew. I was just waiting for her to come out and say it. "I see". "I really, really like you. I've liked you for some time now. And it's difficult to say because I can't look at you properly. I see you and all I can see is your handsome face. So maybe it's easy right now because I'm not looking directly at you". Kirisaki stared down at the floor, fidgeting uncomfortably. "Kirisaki, if you really like me that much and you want to be honest about this then I would appreciate it if you looked at my face". I looked at her, stared at her until she looked up at me. Kirisaki was slow. Slowly building up the emotional strength to face me. We were side by side so there wasn't much distance. Eventually, Kirisaki looked at me, stared into my eyes with a red face. And it stayed like that for several seconds that felt like hours. Kirisaki seemed to be in a trance of some sort, because the next thing I knew happened all too quickly. 

Kirisaki leaned up, pressing her lips to mine. It was suprising, definitely. But I somehow expected it from her. I didn't kiss back, nor did I pull away. I let Kirisaki have her moment, even though I already had Akane. If she knew about this then all hell would break loose. And...well...It did. 

I heard it. We both heard it. In an instant, one heart stopping instant, my front door burst open as if kicked. The kiss between me and Kirisaki separated as we both heard it. My eyes widened in horror. I never thought that I would feel this way. But the tension and the anxiety and the fear that spread like a wild fire was overwhelming. Standing in my doorway...was Akane, panting, sweating, holding an expression of pure hatred and rage, and a kitchen knife in her hand. I could sense the trembling that ran through Kirisaki's body as we both stared at insanity itself. Akane's pupils were the size of pinpricks, her cheeks red from illness, her adrenalin obviously high. I could see that her true colours had presented themselves. This was Akane's other side. Hidden behind a sweet and gentle mask. There was murder scolded into those eyes. I could see it, staring at me, glaring at me. Akane had broken. Shattered into tiny, paper thin pieces. Never to be put back together again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be continued!


	19. Shattered Pieces Of A Shattered Mind and A Shattered Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sh¡t goes down today!

Time seemed to freeze in place after the disturbance of the front door being almost kicked from its hinges. Akane, my girlfriend, stood there, glaring at us with evil intentions in those eyes. I couldn't help but stare back as unease turned my stomach and drained the heat from my blood. My sweet and gentle girlfriend had finally twisted into the very thing that I tried to hide from the world. Akane grasped the blade in her hand tightly, her breath heaving as if she had ran all the way here, which was probably the case. Slowly, I stood up, Kirisaki following me with trembling legs. Akane didn't even flinch. "Akane, I-". "You...". She cut me off, her voice cold and hostile. "You filthy...How dare you...How dare you touch him-you have no right!" Akane wasn't talking to me, but pointing the finger at Kirisaki. She flinched behind me upon hearing Akane's shrill tone. "Akane, calm down". "No, Yuuya. I can't calm down. You're mine, you belong to me! So why...Why would you allow her to touch you with her filthy hands?!" "Y-Yuuya, what is she talking about?" "I can explain and apologise later, okay?" "...?" I should have said something sooner. I should have told Kirisaki that I already had a girlfriend. Maybe this would be an easier situation. But if Kirisaki hates me later I don't think that I would mind. "Don't, Yuuya. Don't bother with her. She doesn't understand you like I do, so please get away from her". "I can't do that, Akane". "Why not?! Are you afraid that I'll do something to her? So what? She deserves it". Akane was coldly spoken, her glare focused on Kirisaki. "No, Akane. Just put the weapon down, now". "Wh-why are you taking her side?!" "I'm not, Akane. I just don't want you to do anything stupid". I slowly approached Akane. I knew that she wouldn't hurt or kill me. If I could calmly approach her then maybe I could disarm her. "Stupid? I-it's not stupid. I...I have to get her out of the way. I have to...". "No, you don't. You know how I feel so there's no need for you to do this. Give me the knife, Akane, please". I reached out to her, wanting her to carefully pass over the knife. Akane hesitated, tears in her eyes. I wasn't sure where we would go from there. Perhaps I could simply ask Kirisaki to leave while I tended to Akane. She would have put too much strain on herself. I reached out further, the knife nearly in my grasp. But things turned around in an instant. 

Akane suddenly thrust her elbow into my lungs, knocking the wind out of them. I fell to my knees, gasping in pain. "Sorry, Yuuya". Akane walked past me, heading towards Kirisaki, knife in a firm grip. "I have to get rid of Kirisaki-chan, otherwise we can't be happy". I tried to get up and stop them but only managed to fall on my side. Despite her frame, Akane is stronger than she looks. The sensation was like that of a tight knot in my stomach, tightening still. I couldn't do anything but watch Akane walk to Kirisaki, who was backing away from Akane. Fear was the only emotion on her face. She was ready to run for it. "If only you weren't here. If only I killed you when I had the chance...". "N-no, Hayashi-san, w-wait". "Why don't you just die, already?!" "Kyaah...!" Akane swung the knife, narrowly missing as Kirisaki dodged in a different direction, shrieking in terror. In an instant, Kirisaki was running to the door, Akane rushing towards her. "Gaah...!" "Run, Rabbit, run! Kyahahaha!" Akane cackled as she chased Kirisaki, knockin things over in the process. The apartment was small so Kirisaki was easily trapped. I slowly made my attempt to stand up as the pain died down. By then Akane grabbed the back of Kirisaki's collar, swiping the knife across and, thankfully, missing as Kirisaki struggled from her grasp. But from her struggle, Kirisaki fell to the floor, her back against the entrance. Akane knelt against her, grabbing her ponytail and making her look up. "Finally, you stopped moving. First, I'll cut out those ugly eyes of yours and then jam the blade down your goddamn throat, just to watch you squirm!" "Ahhhhh! Yuuyaaaa!" "Hahahaha! DIE!" 

Time seemed to slow down in those few seconds of chaos. What would come of it? As Akane raised her blade in the air to make the final blow, I found myself pouncing towards them. Did I do it for Akane or for Kirisaki? To save Kirisaki or to keep Akane from going to prison? No. All my life, I've only done things for myself. I killed animals for my own entertainment and observation, I made 'friends' to hide myself away and observe humans-to become the ideal being, I became Akane's lover to protect my true self and to keep her from single handedly revealing it. I could have failed to even try, on purpose. Kirisaki was a witness to Akane's crimes, so why not let her die and depose of the corpse? When you put it like that, am I protecting myself, or Akane? Am I saving myself from being found out as a sociopath? Or am I protecting Akane...because I care? 

Instinct kicked in, forcing my body to grab Akane from under her arms and pulling her back. I fell to the floor with her in my arms. I landed with a heavy thud. Time started again. "Gah! L-let go, Yuuya! Let go of me!" Akane struggled in my hold. I grabbed hold of her wrist, the wrist which held the knife, and secured it in a tight grip. "That's enough, Akane! That's enough!" I repeated, practically warning her to stop. She gradually calmed down, dropping the knife lifelessly with a dull clank. Akane panted heavily, her body hot from too much excitement. Kirisaki remained seated on the floor, shivering like a flower in winter. Tears fell from her eyes as she whimpered. I kicked the knife away, letting go of Akane to give Kirisaki some sort of comfort. I stood, doing so. "Are you alright, Kirisaki?" I held my hand out to her. With a shaky hand, she accepted it, standing up with difficultly. "Th-thank you". Trembling, Kirisaki thanked me, her face as pale as snow. Akane slowly stood up too, her head lowered. "Why...I don't understand...". Akane spoke quietly, but I could clearly hear her words. "This wasn't...how it was supposed to be". Akane hiccuped, raising her head to reveal tears running down her red cheeks. She was trembling just as much as Kirisaki. "Why...Why are you defending her?! She tried to...take you away from me! It's not fair...It's not...fair". "Akane...". Akane suddenly ran towards the door, running out of it in her condition. "Shit! Akane, wait!" I heard the distant footsteps make their way down the stairs. I had to catch up to her. "Kirisaki, wait for me here. I'll come back". "O-okay...". I wasted no time running after Akane. She wasn't well. With her physical and emotional condition I was afraid that she would end up hurting herself. 

I made it outside. Rain poured heavily from a darkened sky filled with blackened clouds and thunder. I looked around, running in to the right, not knowing where Akane could have gone. "Shit! Akane!" I called out for her, making my way down the empty street in a hurry. "AKANE!" I called out again, louder, obviously receiving no reply. I stopped in the middle of the street. Looking around, I spotted a dark figure, staggering in the rain with no umbrella. "Akane...". I was about to go to her immediately, to talk to her and to try and get through to her. Upon taking the first step, I halted. Akane staggered for another moment before stopping herself, as if sensing my presence. Her head tilted back lazily. Even through the darkness of the shower, I could see her pale face. Tears streamed down from her dead fish eyes, her cheeks red like they were as hot as fire. And then..."...! Akane!" Her eyes rolled back as she collapsed onto the kerb, her body hitting the concrete like a broken ragdoll. I immediately rushed over, crashing down beside her on my knees. I picked her up, shifting the damp strands of hair from her face. "Akane, can you hear me? Akane! Damn it...". I slouched over to listen for any signs of breathing. Luckily she was still breathing, though weakly. I took out my cellphone, dialing for an ambulance. This time I couldn't bring her home and expect her to get better from warmth. She needed to go to a hospital. I held the phone to my ear, listening to the soft ringing as the call was going through. [Hello, 119, what's your emergency?] A woman's voice came through, finally. "Um, hello. My friend just collapsed in the street-she has asthma and she needs an ambulance". [Alright, could you tell us where you are?] I informed them of the street and the building which I recognised. [Okay, thank you. Is she breathing?] "Yes, but it's very weak". [Okay, don't worry. An ambulance has been dispatched and is on its way. Could you tell me your friend's name and age?] "Akane Hayashi, seventeen". [Thank you. Now just sit tight. The ambulance should arrive soon]. "Okay, thank you". I hung up the phone, holding Akane securely in my arms. I picked her up, carrying her body to the overhang of the building. I waited with her, continuously checking her breathing pattern until the ambulance arrived. Once it did, Akane was carefully brought into it with an oxygen mask over her mouth. One of the paramedic's requested that I come along to sort some things out. I had little choice but to agree. I held Akane's cold hand the whole time, her pale face haunting my thoughts. What was this feeling? I didn't quite understand it. Is this the hardest part of...worrying? 

Arriving at the hospital, Akane was immediately taken away by several doctors and nurses. I followed at my own pace, soon being greeted by a male nurse. "Good evening. It's good that you called us when you did. Ir appears your friend is in a critical condition and needs immediate care". "Will she be alright?" "No need to worry. The doctors will take care of her. However, collapsing in the rain like that could put her life at risk, considering the condition of her asthma attack. All we can do is wait and see". I nodded, droplets of rain falling from the bangs of my hair. Would Akane really be alright? After what she did, the energy she poured out from getting so worked up earlier, combined with her asthma and the rain storm, there was probably a very slim chance that she would be alright after this. A very, very slim chance.

So I waited. I waited in the hallways, with a towel provided by one of the nurses slung over my shoulder. I was cold, impatient. Time ticked on and all I could think about was Akane. I didn't have a single thought about Kirisaki who was still waiting in my apartment. When I realised upon my haze of thoughts, I decided to call her, check if she was okay. The call went straight to voice-mail for whatever reason. Did she have her phone off or was she simply refusing to pick up the phone after what happened? "Hello, Kirisaki, it's me. I was calling to tell you that Akane was taken to hospital. She collapsed on the street and I'm currently waiting to hear from the doctors. I don't know when I'll be back, but, stay put. Okay? We can talk when I get there". I hung up, putting the phone back in my pocket with a sigh. At that very moment, the doors opened and one of the doctors stepped through. He tended to Akane, I vaguely recognised his face. "Are you here for Akane Hayashi?" Just hearing her first name caused me to nod with reflex. "Yes, how is she?" "She's recovering at the moment. Although she has a high fever, she should be alright with time. The nurses are tending to her now, as she did come in soaked from head to toe". "Can I see her when they're done?" "Of course. In fact, come right now. They should be finishing now". "Thank you". I followed the doctor through a series of hallways and to the elevator. Akane was situated on the third floor, in a private room. The doctor and the nurses left me alone with her once I arrived. When the door clicked shut, all was silent. The odd smells of a hospital ward hung in the air and the only sound in the room was the repeating machine that provided oxygen for Akane. The soft echo of her breathing was all I could hear, really. Her face was pale but her cheeks remained a shade of red. I approuched her sleeping form, sitting on the hard chair by the bed. Her damp clothes were in a pile on the bed-side table. I guess that's what the nurses were tending to. I couldn't stay for long, but the least I could do is to watch over her until another nurse shows up. For now, I would stay by her side. But how long would that last after today? 

When Imfinally decided to leave, Akane didn't wake up. She was still asleep. Maybe I could come back tomorrow. I arrived at my apartment again. The door was unlocked, procing that Kirisaki was still inside. Upon entering, I saw straight away that she was under the katsu, asleep. It didn't surprise me. I was gone for a long time and she would obviously be exhausted after what happened. Thar would also explain why she didn't get my message. But she couldn't stay here. The trains stopped by now. I manafed to catch the last one. Would she have to stay here? What a bother. I crouched down beside her, lightly shaking her shoulder to wake her. "Kirisaki, wake up". She let out a small groan. Her eyes fluttered open. "Mn...Yuuya?" "Yeah, it's me. I'm sorry that I couldn't get here sooner". "What do you mean? What time is it?" Kirisaki checked her phone. She gasped. "Crap! I missed the train. My mother is gonna kill me". "Call her and tell her that you're staying with a friend for studying and accept punishment later. Youmdon't really have any other choice". "Wait, with a friend? Y-you, Yuuya?" "Well, yeah. The only other friend in the area is Kurosaki but I don't want to burden him with that". "I-I see. Um, I...". Kirisaki's face flustered a deep red. I sighed to myself. It's not a big deal-well, not for me anyway. "If you want, you can use the bathroom and wear one of my t-shirts. I can sleep under the katsu while you use my bed, okay?" "Y-Yuuya, you...You're so mature, unlike all the other boys. You're a real man". No, I'm not. Most men would probably take advantage of the situation, guys like Shimada. I've already shared a bed with Akane and I feel more comfortable with her, strangely enough. "B-but,". She continued. "I don't want to take your bed from you. We could sh-share it". "Are you sure about that?" "Of course. I feel safer if it's you, Yuuya". Thisis going to be awkward. What about everything that happened? Is she so blinded by my outward actions in the past that she doesn't have any concerns about Akane? Maybe she did get the message afterall. 

Kirisaki awkwardly slipped in bed beside me, the futon barely big enough for us both. I had the strongest urge to turn away on my side since I didn't have Akane and her ridiculously big bosom to bother me, that and her need to cling to me. Even so, it was warm and comfortable. It was closet thing to a hug, something that I haven't experienced in years. Kirisaki didn't touch me on purpose. She had little choice but to lean against me. Her hair was down, her cheeks were pink, her legs bare. This situation didn't feel right. It felt out of place. It felt really wrong. "Yuuya...?" Kirisaki's quiet voice tore through the darkened silence, reaching my ears. I didn't respond, but merely listened. "I have to ask, what is your relationship with Hayashi-san?" Finally, she asked the obvious question and an even more obvious question. "Why did she attack me and try to kill me?" "Kirisaki, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. It wasn't something that I could say so openly. She's my...Akane is my girlfriend, sort of". I felt Kirisaki's hand grab my shirt at that moment, when I said 'girlfriend', as if it scared her. "She tried to hurt you because she's very protective of me and would do anything to keep me to herself. That's the nicest way that I could put it". Kirisaki raised herself from her lying position. She seemed to straddle me, her shadow casting over me in the darkness of the room. "Kirisaki...?" "Why...Why would you stay with someone like that? I don't get it. You deserve so much better, yet...". "It's more complicated than that. I doubt that you would understand". "But that isn't fair. I would never keep you in a cage like that. If I was your girlfriend...". "Kirisaki...". I didn't want that. I had no interest in Kirisaki. I didn't want a girlfriend like her. At that moment or otherwise earlier, I realised that my relationship with Akane didn't have to revolve completely around keeping her sane, perhaps Akane was right. No,mshe is right. Akane understands me. She knows what I'm all about, unlike so many other people-even my own family wouldn't understand. "Yuuya, please, consider breaking up with her. If you stay, she'll probably hurt you". But, to break up with Akane...It may risk my life. Although, to live or die can mean my freedom from her jealousy and leash that she wants to lock around my neck. "Yuuya, you could...be with me in secret. No one has to know, especially Hayashi-san. We could be a lot happier. Afterall, I really like you. I may even...l-love you". These decisions were right in front of me. Option one being that I break up with Akane and go out with Kirisaki instead. Option two means that I say no to Kirisakimand stay with Akane, trapped. Obviously, there is option three. It was my best option. All may cause unhappiness but the third is the most satisfactory for me. "So, what do you say, Yuuya?" 

A week past, and summer vacation began. Everyone went on trips and I stayed at home for work. I told Kirisaki that I couldn't be with her. It wasn't meant to be. But I'm hesitant on my decision involving Akane. She's still in hospital but I haven't been visiting her. There's nothing to say to her yet. She's probably upset and confused. But being apart from me will help her collect herself again, I hope. I haven't heard anything from the doctors which is a good sign. It means that she's recovering and not getting worse. However, once Akane is discharged, what do I do then? If I see her, what do I say to her? I had a good idea-but I'm still hesitant. I don't even know when she's going to be able to leave hospital. All I could do was wait and see. 

I got off work late at night after my boss gave me two weeks off for summer vacation. It was a bother but she insisted. What could I do for two weeks? Study? That was all I could do since everyone else was away. Kurosaki would be gone for a week of summer vacation to Sapporo with his parents. So I would be by myself. My cellphone buzzed in my back pocket. I reached in for it, checking the caller ID. It was anonymous. I answered it, hesitant. "Hello...?" ["Hello, Yuuya Kizami?"] "Yes, who is this?" ["This is Dr. Tachibana, I tended to Akane Hayashi when you brought her in"]. "Oh, yes, hello, doctor. Is this about Akane?" ["Yes. She has been discharged today"]. "Wait, today?" ["Yes, we asked for a contact since we couldn't contact her parents and she gave us your details. She picked up a taxi an hour ago and is just heading to your home. I'm sure she'll be happy to see you"]. What? My apartment? "I'm sure. Thank you, doctor". The conversation ended. This wasn't good, not at all. What is she planning? I had to get home quickly. I ran to train station, hoping to catch the earliest train. She may already be there, preparing to kill me or something. She was capable of doing so. 

Breathlessly, I ran into my apartment building, dashing up the stairs as the elevator was already in use. Upon reaching my font door, I halted to catch my breath. I had to prepare for the worst, even if I was unarmed. I woild have to figure it out later. After a week of zero contact she would probably be angry with me, furious even. But would she really try to attack me? If so she would have waited in the hallway to ambush me. This was crazy, but so was Akane. I mean, me too but that's not the casd here. I took a deep breath, opening up the door. It was unlocked. How did she get in? Did she pick the lock.? I opened the door further and step inside with caution. I froze right there. Akane was in my apartment but it wasn't anything that I had expected. She was in the kitchen area, holding a kitchen knife and...cooking. A pot was set on the stove, boiling. Akane chopped vegetables with a relaxed smile on her face and an apron around her waist. This was scary in itself. It was like nothing happened. She looked well again, too. She spotted me at the enterance, her smile becoming instantly brighter. "Oh, you're home! How was work? Did you work harder than usual? What am I saying-you always work hard". This was confusing. I didn't understand why she was acting like this. Although, could it be that she was...in denail? "What are you standing around for, mister man? Take your shoes off and get in here. Dinner is nearly ready". Akane wiped her hands on her apron, approuching me. I didn't flinch, even when she kissed my cheek. "Hm, gorgeous as ever". She said, returning to the kitchen to continue. I slipped my shoes off, closing the door and entering the apartment. "Geez, what's wrong, honey? You look like you just saw a ghost". I think I'm looking at one right now. "No, it's nothing. How...are you feeling? Are you all better?" "What do you mean? I'm as fit as a fiddle as per usual. Why are you asking such a random question in such a worried tone?" "Akane, do you remember where you were a few hours ago?" "I was at the store, buying groceries for tonight's dinner. I told you that this morning". Akane really was in denail. I had to get through to her somehow because this was getting frustrating. "No, Akane. You were in hospital. You were discharged today. Don't pretend that everything's fine because I stopped visiting you. I had my reasons". "Pfft, wh-what are you talking about? I haven't been in a hospital since I was little. Why are joking around like that? Silly...". Akane continued to cut vegetables, refusing to look at me. That was the last straw. I made up my mind. I couldn't do this anymore. "Akane, I really think we should break up". And then, everything turned 360° again. Akane stopped cutting vegetables and froze, holding the knife with a still hand. Her head was lowered, her lips straight and serious. "Why...all of a sudden...". Her voice turned cold as ice again. "Why are you...suddenly...b-breaking up...with me?" "You know why, don't you? I can't do this anymore, Akane. I can't keep being on a leash, dragged around by you. So let's break up. I need time away from you. A lot of time". Akane's hand began shaking. She raised the knife slightly. "Is it...because of Kirisaki? Are you leaving me because of her?" "It isn't about tha-". "Don't you dare lie to me". Akane spoke sternly, stabbing the tip of the knife into the wood of the chopping board. "You can't...You can't leave me, Yuuya. You can't". "Yes, Akane. I can and will. Now, I would appreciate it if you left. Or do I have to drag you out with force?" "No...This isn't right. I thought...I thought you would love me, too. This isn't how it was supposed to go. I did so much to find you and now...". Tears streamed down from Akane's eyes. Slowly she struggled to free the knife from the surface of the wood. That is until it came out, cracking the chopping board from force. Akane turned to face me, the knife in hand. "I don't want to hurt you, Yuuya, but I can't let you leave me either. I...I'm sorry". "Fuck..!" I went for the door on reflex, having to turn around as Akane darted after me. I only just managed to grab her wrists tightly. She struggled against me, her pupils once again like pinpricks and her teeth grating together. I was strong, but it seemed that Akane could somehow match me. Even so, I kicked her leg, the jerk forcing the knife from her grip. It fell to the floor with a clank. I thought I could win this, but Akane retaliated. 

With a swift and strong kick, Akane smacked my shin, sending me kneeling on the ground, therefore letting go of her wrists. In the next, heart-stopping, instant, Akane quickly and roughly wrapped her fingers around my throat. She squeezed tightly, my back hitting the floor as I collapsed back. I grabbed her wrists again, struggling to stop her as she strangled me without mercy. "Gyaah! Ack!" I tried to scream for air, gasping and kicking my legs to try and free myself. But it was pointless. I was merely wasting precious energy while Akane tightened her grip around my neck. Tears continued to roll down her cheeks. She hiccuped and apologised repeatedly. "Haa...I-I'm sorry, Yuuya. I'm so, so sorry. I'm sorryyyy...Forgive me...Forgive me, please...". I was losing the ability to breath within seconds. The room around me was falling into darkness and I could do nothing to bring the light back. Was this it? The end? I stopped kicking, my arms goinf limp after the struggle. Tears of agony fell from my eyes and turned cold. Everything was cold. My eyes were slowly closing and the last thing I felt was Akane's warm tears hitting my cheeks and colliding with my own tears. The last thing I saw was her face. Her saddened expression that made my heart skip it's last beat. I was really going to die. I knew that it would happen eventually, but now? Heh, I guess this is what they call karma. I would die and emotionless and cold-hearted man with a tiny soft spot for my killer. How dumb and ironic. Darkness was all I could see now. I could hear nothing. I could feel nothing. My heart wasn't beating. My blood had stopped flowing. This really was it. In my final moments I would have no regrets. I would die never knowing what love feels like. Oh, well. There's always the next life or the next. For now, I would float aimlessly in the darkness and wait for a new light, for a new life. 

Goodbye, Akane. I...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...To be continued..


	20. The Inevitable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go. This is the final part of Akane's past. In addition, this story is nearing it's end. There are a few chapters to go but, other than that, it's almost finished. My other story As Time Passes will definetely last longer, to anyone reading it. I think after this I'm going to start longer series. I have ideas for at least two fanfictions with the whole Corpse Party cast, except for the spirits in heavenly host. I'll see how they go. Okay, let's move on. Here's the finally part of Akane's past.
> 
> Warning: Contains depictions of blood gore and self-harm.

Akane's POV

Aged sixteen. The age when Kizami-senpai stopped visiting Kyoto. The last time I saw him, we were both fifteen. That was months ago. I found myself lost, wondering, constantly thinking of him. At the time I didn't realise my obsession with him was in fact an obsession at all. I merely considered these feelings to be love rather than co-dependency. Only, Senpai didn't know that he was helping me, releasing me, allowing me to depend on his appearance and the traits that we shared. Those were the reasons that I blindly loved him without questioning if he felt the same or if he even remebered me. Still...Watching him pass by in the town was enough. Even if he never saw me, not even with a glance. "What's wrong with me?" I ask myself, curled up in a ball on my mattress. I didn't know the answer yet I asked myself. Honestly, I didn't care for an answer. I didn't want anyone to say that I couldn't be in love. I didn't want anyone to point out that I was crazy for falling in love with someone who doesn't even look my way. All I know from him is that we're the same. I know we are. And I love him for that. I love him for being born-for being the physical evidence that shows that I'm not alone in the world. I'm different. And so is he. I can't emphasise the word enough because everyone is different, but according to everyone, there is such a word know as "normal". I am not normal. Neither his he. According to everyone, that is. Their glances and whispering says so. Without him, I'm alone, seperated from the whole world. That is my only fear. I fear being trapped in this large cage forever, destined to be the wife of a man who is unbearable to listen to. I know enough about him to last several lifetimes. Yet I know nearly nothing about Kizami and I love him more than my neighbour's son. It's like a romance novel. A forbidden love, like Romeo and Juliet. The question is; will I have to fake my death in order to be free with Senpai? If that's the case, someone would really have to die for my freedom.

I escaped from the house once again. I wasn't so scared to get caught. Not now or back when I first got out. If that's the case then perhaps it would be possible to just run away and never look back. However, it can't be that easy, can it? What if they try to find me, my parents? Not out of love but to trap me in the arranged marrige that so desperately want to get out of. My family care for appearances and nothing that they consider less important. In other words, they care more about how people see them than their youngest daughter, Akira. A.K.A, me. Maybe when I escape, I can change my name and start over. What a nice thought. The thought circles my head as I wander through town. As I do so, I look up from the ground without thinking, like instinct told me to. I gasped, scurrying behind a tree. I didn't realise that I came to the train station. A few people got off, including...him. Kizami-senpai. I watched him. He looked so mature now, still beautiful as ever. "Senpai...". A young man followed him off the train. I vagely recognised him as Senpai's friend. They were on a trip again? I smiled with glee, overwhelmed with happiness. He was only in front of my eyes, so why was I so excited? I couldn't explain-not with a reasonable explaination. Although, many people would consider it unreasonable because they don't understand at all. I stared at him for a few more seconds as he walked away from the station. That would make me a stalker if I followed him, so I hesitated. All I ever did was hesitate when he was there, right in front of my eyes. I didn't want that to last. I wanted to have courage in order to talk to him. As I was about to take a step towards him, I felt a hand grab my shoulder from behind. The shock made me spin around to face them. When I did, my blood ran cold in an instant. "N-no...". I stammered, my hands beginning to shake. "I thought I saw you sneaking out, little brat". My elder sister...She saw me...Sis' wore a sadistic grin, her arms crossed as she stood tall before me. "Who were you staring at?" "N-no one. Leave me be. I'm...I'm going to go home now". "Are you sure? Once mom and dad find out I don't think you would want to stay". She wouldn't dare. No, she would. "Th-that's not fair!" Was all I could spout, like a defenseless child. I couldn't argue back. It was impossible to win a verbal fight with my intimidating sister. "Fair? Tch, little bitch. Wanna know what's not fair? You get to live in a nice, big manor when you get married to that little snob next door. You get to have more money than me and you don't even lift a fucking finger!" "Kyah...!" Sis' suddenly slapped me across the face, sending my glasses to the concrete. My cheek burned. I didn't want those things. Not at all, yet I get slapped for it. 

"Tch, I guess it's not all bad for me. I'll be sure to visit when you have to carry lots of ugly little babies and go through the pain of popping them out. You'll be left with all the work and you'll never get to see pretty boy ever again". I was shaking, my feet unable to move. I was grounded, unable to speak. As much as I wanted to fight back I knew I had no benifit. It was pointless. "No response? How very like you. What now? Are you gonna go crawl under a rock and stay there? Heh, see ya at home, little sister". She walked away from me without another word. I hated her. I hated her so much. Why couldn't she just disappear and take my parents with her? This had to be the final straw. In two years, two short and painful years, I would have to get married without arguing. I would lose my virginity to someone that I don't even like-nevermind love! I would have children that don't belong to Senpai. I didn't want that. I had to get away. If I left and went far, far away then I could srart over, have a new life. But my life isn't complete without Senpai. He had to be in it at all costs. But, how? What if he already had someone he likes or what if he isn't even interested in women? Maybe I could just be in his presence and that would be enough. I picked up my glasses from the ground, wiping the fake lens with my thumb. I had to get home quickly and make a plan to run away from home. There had to be away to erase my existance, Akira's existance. But how? 

Back in my cage, father had stayed at home to work. Out of curiousity I stumbled into his study, where he was typing on his computer. By the looks of things he was sending an e-mail. He noticed my presence, momentaraly turning his head towards me and then turning back to his computer in a split second, as if there was merely a draft in the room. "What is it, Akira?" "What are you doing, father?" "It's none of your concern. However, perhaps you'll find out eventually. Your mother and I are taking a business trip to Tokyo with your sister. I'm sending an e-mail to the neighbour saying that you'll be at home. They can check on you while you're away". "I see. When are you leaving?" "The first of next month". The first of July. "Now get out of my study. You're not supposed to be in here, remember?" I left without saying another word. I could while they were gone. I could just run away without notice. No one had to know. I could change my name, rent an apartment, get a job and attend school again. It may have sounded like a mere dream but, to me, it was everything. While the hope was in my mind, I wandered to my room and locked the door. My chest hurt. Since I met Kizami-senpai, I've changed myself in appearance. Facing the standing mirror I looked over my reflection. Taking off my glasses and removing the band in my hair, I felt goosbumps raise along my arms. I looked so different. My dark hair became longer without extensions, my eyes matured so much that I really didn't need my glasses anymore. The only thing left was...I looked down at myself, at my chest. Removing my shirt, I revealed the bandages that held my bosom down, that kept it hidden. Unwrapping each one, I could see how big it had gotten. Strange. The bra I had could barely fit anymore. I looked like a totally different person. Maybe I needed that so no one would recognise me. I wore the glasses, the bandages and the hair band to hide this new me. All I needed now was a plan. This was only the first step. 

The month went by. For that month, my sister was at college so she wasn't around to tell my mother about senpai or anything. She was coming back today, the day before they would all leave for Tokyo. I did a lot of research in that month. I researched jobs, apartments and so on. I managed to collect some money for the trip and other expenses through selling some of my belongings. Father wasn't home at the moment due to work, sister could be coming back at the momen, mother was at home. The odd thing was that mother had been on the phone for a while, wearing a smile. Who was it? Father? Sister? I didn't care. I only watched her from the kitchen as I prepared fruit. The tile beneath me gleamed in the sunlight, the sound of fruit being cut was all that filled the room, aside from the mumblings of my mother over the phone. And then it happened. Mother went silent, although still holding the phone to her ear. The silence made me stop. I looked over, waiting. "I...I see". She muttered, her hand shaking. "Thank you, dear. I'll see you at home, we can talk more about this later". Mother dropped the phone, hanging up. For a moment, she stood there before speaking, to me directly. "Akira, may I have a word with you?" I gulped. What...What happened? Was that sister? Did she...Mother approuched me. Before I knew it, she slapped me across the jaw, making me drop the utensil in my hand onto the chopping board. Looking at mother's face, she was furious with me. "What is this about a boy? Hm? Your sister tells me that you've been sneaking out to gawk at a boy! Who is he? Tell me right now!" I was shaking. This was to be expected but I wasn't prepared for it. "M-mother, I...". "Don't you dare refer to me as your mother. Do you even realise the embarrassment that this would cause to this family? You shameful, stupid girl! Staring at some common boy when you are already engaged. I sholud beat you sensless for this". This couldn't go on. What kind of mother speaks this way to their child? I grew up with it my whole life but even I knew that this wasn't normal. "That...That isn't your call". I spoke up, my fist clenched. "Shut up, you old bat. Why do I have to put up with this?! He isn't just some common boy-I love him!" Mother's eyebrow twitched with anger. She suddenly grabbed my left wrist, slapping me across the face again. Again and again, over and over. "Little bitch! Don't say such disgusting things! I should have never given birth to you-do you near me?! Once we get back from Tokyo I'm going to request permission for the marriage to be effective as soon as possible. You can move out and we'll never have to see you again!" Stop it. Stop it..."And you'll never see that commoner again, ever!" Stop it! Stop it! "Stop iiiiit!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, reaching for the chopping board and grabbing what I needed. 

I broke away from mother's beatings and her grip, lunging forward to pierce the small fruit knife into her stomach. The flesh was soft against the blade, stabbing deeply into her insides. Blood flowed from the wound as everything else was still. In the next instant, I pulled the blade straight out. Blood spit out, splashing on my clothes. Mother, due to the shock, collapsed back wards. She hit the floor with a dull thud, moaning and holding the wound. I panted heavily, a sudden haziness filling my mind. I dropped the knife as if possessed, reaching for the larger knives until I grabbed the biggest one. I collapsed forward, onto my knees, on top of mother. Her eyes showed fear. A beautiful, memorizing fear! I couldn't help but smirk at her pitiful state. Raising the knife, I held it there. "A-Akira...please, no...". Mother spoke, sputtering blood from her lying mouth. "Hehe...". I giggled, plundging the knife into her stomach again. "Gyaaah!" Mother screamed, her eyes buldging. I raised the knife again, my hands quickly stained with crimson blood. The possession took over, pushing all my anger and frustration into impaling mother over and over with the blade in my hands. I must have really lost it because I wasn't looking where I was stabbing exactly. First it was the stomach, the chest, the stomach again, the neck, the collarbone, the eye, the other eye, the throat. Even after mother's screams died down into dead silence I continued stabbing until parts such as her eyes and her intestines were nothing but unidentifiable mush. The tile below was painted crimson red, my clothes too. When I exhausted most of my energy, I dropped the knife on the ground, in the puddle of blood and gore. I broke out of my daze, slowly realising my actions. But I wasn't shocked or scared or regretful. No. I was happy. "Heh...haha...hahaha....hehehe, kukuku...ah...hah...ahah...ahahahaha!" The relief washed over me with the blood of my dead mother. I looked at my shaky, stained hands, enjoying the everlasting ecstacy with insane laughter. "Hahahahah! Hah! Hahahaha! I did it! I killed her! She's finally dead!" I stared into the goop that was once my mother's eyes with a painful grin on my face. "What was that...mother? You're sorry? You want forgiveness? Hehehe...Too late. Hmhmhm...You're already dead-a lifeless corpse!" I panted heavily as the excitement died down. I cradled myself, shivers running through my skin like insects. As much as I wanted to smear her brains all over the walls, I had to dispose of the evidence before the new paint job dried. I had to get rid of the body somehow and clean up the fingerprints before anyone else came home. Then I would dispose of them. Yes, all of them. This wasn't in the plan, but now I was commited. I had to finish what I started. 

I cleaned up the blood and the fingerprints I would have left. I was very thourough, making sure that nothing was left behind. I even washed my clothing and changed. There was a new plan in addition to the original. I came up with it while dragging my mother's skinned skeleton to the backdoor, leaving it there. No blood could soak throufh since there was none left. It all flushed down the sink, her skin and teeth stored in packages for later disposal. I made sure to wear gloves the whole time, leather ones, my fathers. It was nearing the late hours of the afternoon when he came home. "I'm home! Honey...?" He called out to mother and, of course, there was no reply. I waited patiently for him to step further into the house before striking. Only, I struck with caution. I wanted to take this slowly. Stepping out from my hiding place, I faced father, knife behind my back. "Akira, where's your mother?" "...Out". I lied. "Why would she go out? We were going to pack this evening". I approuched him slowly, my impatience growing. "...". "Akira...?" Father began to step away. "S-stay back. What have you done? What did you do?!" "This...". I charged, raising the blade and plundging it deep into my father's chest. "Gah...!" He fell to the floor like mother did, squeeling like a pig. I grabbed his hair, stabbing directly into his eyes, twisting the blade as much as I could. He continued screaming, blood flowing from the sockets. I made sure not to get covered in it this time. Father collapsed, lifeless, dead. And I repeated what I did to mother. Skinned him, pulled out his teeth for dental records, put the skeleton in a body bag and the remains in packages. To dispose of the bags, I hid them in a place that only I knew about. I locked them up and kept the key. As for the packages, I dumped them in the skip behind the house. They were to be collected tomorrow by the rubbish truck without anyones knoweledge. All that was left was to kill big sister and to disappear myself. I was broken, unable to be fixed. A broken toy beyond repair, a flower that had its petals torn off and never to grow back again. There was no turning back after all this. Especially when I made sis' suffer the most in her death. She screamed and cried and begged for mercy or death but I lingered and felt nothing for her. I disposed of her corpse differently since there was no more room in that hiding place. Once I did so, I packed a bag, putting my clean clothes away. Speaking of which, I buried some of mother and father's clothes and bags with them to make it look like they already went on the trip. I would be left alone in the house. I stood in my room, by the door, clutching the knife in my hand. I had to disappear. Akira had to disappear. I tore the front of my clothes swiftly, letting several buttons fall to the carpet. I held the knife in my gloved hands, taking a few deep breaths. This had to be done. Akira had to die. Swiftly, I stabbed the knife into my side. "Gaah! Ah! Haah...". The firey agony filled my side, bile turning in my stomach. I made sure not to strike any organs, just my side. Pulling the knife out, I groaned, feeling the blood gush from the wound. As much as I trembled from the pain, I held the knife steadily, allowing myself to collapse. I even dragged myself out of the room, creating a short trail. Quickly, I held the wound to stop anymore bleeding. This way it looks like I was wounded and possibly kidnapped, as the wound I made is not fatal. I even made the angle look convincing, but without a body or fingerprints, they can't confirm that it was self harm. I tended to the wound as best I could. Now, I was free. I did what I had to, making sure that I didn't leave too much evidence that could point to me. I packed my glasses and the bandages around my chest, disguising myself. By then it was night. The sky turned dark. This was it, my escape. 

I left the house, leaving the door unlocked. With my mother's suitcase in hand, I left. The wound on my side still hurt but I could tend to it properly at a rest stop. I headed for the train station to Osaka. That was where I could start over. Afterall, Senpai lived there. All I had to do was visit the apartment that I was registered to rent, find a part-time job and find out what school Senpai attended. I would get my happy ending, my prince. It was only a matter of time. At the time I didn't know what was in store for me, I only had expectations. I never thought I would stay in Osaka until I was seventeen before finding Kizami's school, before meeting him, before becoming his girlfriend. I was so happy when he asked me. I call him Yuuya now, my sweet Yuuya. He was everything that I dreamed of. But things just had to get in the way. SHE had to get in the way. And then I... 

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry". I whispered these words to myself, my hands still around Yuuya's neck. I loosened the grip with warm tears rolling down myself. Yuuya...was still warm. He closed his eyes when he stopped moving. "Ah...!" I held his face with both hands, my body trembling in fear. "Yuuya...Yuuya, w-wake up. Wake up!" I looked around the apartment then back down at Yuuya. I could still save him-I had to! "I can save you! Just hold on!" I had to act fast, even if I was in a trance. I dragged Yuuya across the floor, his almosr lifeless body. I knew he could still make it. I knew he could! But once I did save him I could necer let him go again. Not ever. I had to keep him safe from me, from myself. If he ever left me I wouldn't know what to do. If he was with me always, I would be protecting him from myself, keeping him from harm. This was the only way. I love Yuuya so much, that's why I hace to do it. I can't...I can't let him run away again, even if I had to cut his hands and feet off. I lay him down on the bed, his warmth still in his body. I kissed his forehead. "I'll protect you from now on. I'll keep you safe from me. Okay? I love you, Yuuya, so, so much". I placed both hands on his heart, overlapping them. "I love you...". I cried, tears streaming down my cheeks as I smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeaaaah...That happened. Stuff happened. More stuff will happen next time. Bye.


	21. Delusional

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was short-ish, but it's perfect for leading up to the next chapter, which should be longer.

Kizami's POV

Darkness. Pain. Irritation. I was aware of these, finally conscious. Numb. Cold. Strained. Many sensations piled one after the other, all unpleasant. The pain around my neck and the sting in my eyes was constant and uncomfortable. I coughed and wheezed, struggling to breath. It was as if I died then suddenly had oxygen forced into my lungs to bring me back. Maybe that was the case. I panted, my voice scratchy, causing me to cough again. My eyes stung so much when I actually opened them. Everything was dark. The room shed no light. The room was my room. I vaguely recognized the furniture in the darkness. Blinking, I tried to adjust my vision so that I could get a better picture of my surroundings. It was certainly my room. I was lying on the floor, my futon beneath me. My attempt to get up was short lived as I was unable to sit up. The most I could do was arch my back, hearing my spine crack from the lack of movement. I groaned, once again coughing as I had once again let my torn voice out. Like I had swallowed dust. The thought made me cringe upon reflex. What was keeping me grounded, I wondered. My arms were clearly above my head but I could barely feel my hands and wrists. Were they tied together? I even tried moving my senseless hands, somehow grounded by something heavy. My feet were the same, unable to move as something very heavy kept them down. I could bend my knees up but nothing more. Doing so made me aware of the cold numbness in my feet. They tingled as my hands and fingers did. My limps were asleep while I was. But for how long?

Akane...Akane did this. The memories slowly returned to my thoughts, revolving around them and playing over and over as I tried to recollect each scene. I tried to break up with Akane, she got upset, she tried to...kill me, she strangled me until I past out. It was certainly possible to strangle someone without killing them, temporarily cutting off oxygen to the brain and reviving them with CPR. But no one would do that just for the hell of it. Had Akane kidnapped me? In my own apartment? Speaking of which, where was she? Probably in the next room. And I dreaded to think what she was doing at the moment. Right now I was dying for water. With every heavy breath came a raspy cough. After a certain coughing fit I began to hear footsteps outside my room. It was her. Akane. Her footsteps came towards the door at a relaxed and steady pace. She was in no rush. Of course not-I was tied firmly to the ground. There was a quiet click, followed by creaking. The door at the far side of the room, facing me, slid open, shuffling against the wooden floor. Light shone behind the figure of Akane, standing in the doorway. She was clearly holding something. I could see that despite ever other feature being shrouded in darkness. The object in her hand glimmered sharply. A knife! I awaited for her to speak. When she did a chill ran up my spine. "Yuuya, honey? Are you awake yet?" "...". I remained silent. My attempt in staying silent, hoping that she would leave, failed as she stepped closer into the room. "I heard you cough, poor baby. I know you're awake". The light flickered on with a click. Flashing on above me, I immediatly shut my eyes from the blinding light. I only managed to get a second's glimpse of Akane before shutting my eyes. She stood over me, the light switch in one hand and a kitchen knife in the other. It was a truely terrifying glimpse, I suppose. "Sorry. I wanted to keep the light off, let you sleep peacefully". I heard rustling before opening my eyes. Akane kneeled next to me, shifting the bottom of her skirt under her knees. She had a serious expression on her face before smiling at me. It looked sweet before all of this and now it reminded me of a psychopath trying to put on a friendly smile. I knew that smile all too well from looking in the mirror for my own practice. 

Akane placed the knife next to her, droplets of clear liquid sliding down the blade. "Yuuya, do you know why I have bound you here, to your bed?" Akane sounded calm, as if she believed that this wasn't a crime but like a punishment you give to a five-year-old for misbehaving. At least, that's how she appeared to be treating the situation. "You tried to run away form me, tried to abandon me. I couldn't have that. If you ever left me then I would be very upset. I was upset. But now that you are here again, we can start over. From now on, no more games, okay? No more running away". What the hell was this? Akane appeared to try and stay calm about this but struggled. Her hands trembled. "I was really hurt when you said that we should break up. But that was a joke, right? Well it wasn't very funny. So, as punishment, I'm going make sure that you never try to leave again. Just know that I won't hurt you...unless absolutely neccessary. I can take good care of you from now on. I'll look after you". This was insane! I couldn't make any protests because of my sore and dry throat, as much as I wanted to. Akane knew that, her smile growing wider into a smirk as I tried to speak, resulting in more scratchy coughing. "Sshh, ssh...Don't try to speak. I'll go get you some water with ice. Stay put now. Teehee". Akane giggled before standing, kicking the knife down to my feet. What, was she paranoid that I could reach it? I was bound to, what now appeared to be, cinder blocks. I wasn't going anywhere, especially since the rope around my wrists and ankles was thick and somehow looped around many times. Akane returned with a glass of fresh water, cubes of ice floating at the top. Kneeling down once more, Akane fed me a sip. I savoured the tasteless water, the cold liquid sliding down my throat, relieving me slightly. "Want more?" For now I could only comply. I nodded, accepting another sip. My throat was still sore and dry, like after throwing up and all you can feel is the unbearable dryness. I drank more, Akane holding and tilting the back of my head to keep me from choking. "There we go. Better?" I nodded, letting out a softer cough. "I'm glad that you're behaving. I was afraid that you would yell at me and hate me. But you understand that I can easily harm you-as much as I would hate myself for it? I'm sorta at an advantage here. But as long as you're a good boy, I won't lay a finger on you. I promise". Akane kissed my forehead, running one hand through my hair, just above my ear. 

Akane pulled away, smiling at me innocently. "As I said, I'm going to take good care of you from now on. I can do everything for you since you are in no position to do anything. I'll feed you, wash you and so on. It'll be okay". No way. She couldn't keep me here and treat me like a hospital patient, bound to my bed and having someone else do everthing for me. That was insane! "A-akane...You can't...You can't do tha-*cough*...". "Why not? I won't let you leave me again-so of course I can do that!" Akane slammed the tray down onto the floor, the glass tipping over and spilling the melted ice. "Shoot! Look what you made me do. I have to clean this up now". Akane got up with frustration written clearly on her face. She left the room once more, returning with a cloth to wipe up the mess. Once she began cleaning it frantically, she stopped midway, taking in a deep breath. "Haah...hooo...Okay...It's no one's fault. I can't get angry. Not now. Never again". Akane mumbled these words to herself in an attempt to calm down. It was working, apparantly. "S-sorry if I made you angry". I lied, honestly not wanting to apologise. I was uncertain of what she would do if I made her angry. Akane was insane enough to do just about anything. It wasn't cowardice, it was being smart in order to survive and escape this ordeal. "That's okay. I-I'm sorry for raising my voice and breaking your glass". If we remained on some sort of common ground then I wouldn't be at risk of getting my limbs chopped off. Akane scooped up pieces of broken glass into the chipped and cracked glass, setting it aside as she cleaned the floor and the tray. "Um, dinner will be ready soon. I will be back when it's ready. We can set some ground rules then, okay?" I gave a brief nod. Akane replied with the same motion, carrying the broken glass and tray back to the main room. I sighed when she left. I had to get out of here somehow. It was my apartment but I had to run away, go to the police or anyone. But how would I leave in the first place? 

Akane returned with the same tray, only this time carrying a bowl of soup, a plate of bread and a fresh glass of water. She kneeled down beside me once more, setting the tray down. "I'll get some pillows for your head so you can eat, okay?" Akane searched the closet next to us, taking out a few extra pillows that had been there since I moved in. I even took the liberty of washing the cases since they were a bit filthy to begin with. Akane positioned two under my head, keeping it upright. "Now,". She began, taking a spoonful of soup. "I want to set some rules that we can both follow. Rules that will make us both happy". As if that was possible, concerning my part in this. "Firstly, you have to stay in bed the entire time. Every week I will change the futon. It'll be the only time you are allowed up. Of course, I have to carry a weapon just in case". "What about going to the bathroom?" "I'm sorry, but you have to use a bed pan. It's disgusting, I know, but I can't help but feel paranoid. Please try to understand". So it was like being a hospital patient, with a psychopath for a nurse. "I will provide you with three meals a day, I will wash you properly. I plan to quit my current job and work at your job so I can keep an eye on you. It means that you won't be tied here forever, but I have to be there at all times". This wasn't a life! This was imprisonment! If you compared this to keeping a pet then there wouldn't be much difference. "Right now, I have trust issues. But one day I hope that you will adapt to it all and one day, willingly, stay with me. I know you will learn to love me". She was indenial, delusional. Wasn't it clear when I tried to break up with her? I can't love her! "Akane...". What was I suppose to say? If I spoke my true feelings then she would get upset and do god-knows-what. So...I just had to accept all of this until I escaped? I had to endure it all? "...Fine". "Huh...?" "I understand, Akane. I'll co-operate. Who know? Maybe I will fall in love with you by the end of this?" Akane's eyes were full of hope. "Yuuya...Yuuya! You do understand!" Akane leaped for me, wrapping her arms around my neck and hugging me. I lied to her, again. Maybe she knew that but chose to not accept the truth. She wanted me to be in love with her. All I had to do was pretend. I had to pretend until I found a way out. Even if my last option was suicide. I had to take it. For now, I only thought of survival and the chance of escape. To do that, I had to pretend again. I nad to pretend to "behave" and to be "a good boy". Then I would find an opening and take it, running as far as my legs could carry me. Sorry Akane, but...

I do not love you. At least, I thought so.


	22. Misery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Contains Suicidal Thoughts.

A week. I spent nearly a week imprisoned in my own apartment. I stayed in bed for the longest time, only being allowed to get up every time the futon and my clothes were changed. Akane acted as if everything she was doing was completely rational. I actually hated to see her like that, caught up in her own world. Everything was perfect to her. Having me in her life twenty-four-seven was all she needed to keep whatever ounce of sanity she had left. Every night she would sleep in the same futon with me, clinging to me, saying goodnight to me. She had deluded herself thinking that this relationship would work out if I complied and behaved. But I was only "behaving" to gain her trust. Within that week, I kept my head down and my chin up. Akane wasn't hurting me in any way because of my brilliant acting skills. Even so, I refuse to tell her that I love her. I bite my tongue whenever she says it to me. In other words, I just nod along. Lately it's as if saying it would be like losing to her. That sounds strange because it's almost as if I...really do love her and I just don't want to admit it. Admitting it would be like saying that I gave in, that I'm happy living this way. I'm not. This had to end. Now or never. 

One night, on a Sunday, Akane lay beside me like she usually did. Her arms always remained around my waist while she slept. It was like she was scared of the thought that I would eventually leave, or at least make an attempt. Akane clung to me the same way every night. Only, tonight, her grip seemed to be...loose. I mean, she wasn't holding onto me as securely as she's always been. It didn't matter anyway. I was still bound to two cinder blocks at my hands and feet. I was wondering how my hands and feet didn't die or fall asleep. They were numb but I could still move my fingers and toes. Perhaps she would change the rope while I slept? She would give my limbs a bit of freedom while I wasn't conscious to see it. It was all I could think of. Looking down at my chest, the top of Akane's head was the first thing to catch my attention. Her dark hair glimmered under the light of the window, the drapes open and the sky clear. I sighed, letting my head land back on the pillow. I stared up at the ceiling, unable to sleep tonight. At least for now. I tried to sleep, closing my eyes and allowing my thoughts to go blank. 

When moring arose, I found that I slept after all. My eyes stung a little from lack of sleep, but sleep nonetheless. I rubbed my eyes...Wait. I could rub my eyes? I was fully awake when the realisation struck me like lightning. I looked down at my hands. I was free from the bindings on my wrists. Rubbing my eyes again, I made sure that I wasn't dreaming but it was certainly real. Sitting up, I looked around the room. The morning sun was shining brightly through the window. Akane wasn't in my room. Maybe she was in the kitchen or the bathroom. Either way, I had to ask why she let go of my wrists so carelessly. Was this intentional? I tried to get up, somehow finding it difficult as something pulled on my ankles. I looked down once I managed to stand, finding that the cinderblocks were still dragging me down. The rope was replaced by two chains and a padlock. The way that it was set up looked complicated but it looked as if unlocking the padlock would make the binds fall apart. Obviously Akane thought this through. I knelt down knocking on the cinderblocks and brushing my fingers against the surface. They were smooth, probably as not to damage the floor as I walked. I tried doing so, feeling like a new born deer as I struggled to take it a step at a time. I leaned against furniture and the walls for support as I made my way to the door. It wasn't locked, luckily. Looking into the main room, I could see that it was empty. The living room, the kitchen area. I cautiously kept quiet as I didn't know what was going on and I didn't know where Akane could be. That is until I found a note on the kitchen counter. 

(Dear Yuuya, I left for work today so I'm trusting you to look after yourself for a while. I trust you. Just to be safe, I chained you to the cinderblocks and locked all the doors and windows. I made sure that you can't leave in any way. Pretty impressive, huh? I left food for you so all you have to do is heaten it up in the microwave for 2 minutes, both breakfast and lunch. I'll be back by dinner so be patient, okay? You can watch T.V or read to kill some time before I get back. You won't be able to make any calls either because I removed all the plugs and their wires connecting to the phones. All keys are with me and anything that can be used as a lockpick are no longer in the house, such as hair pins and paper clips. I'm sorry about this, but I have to do it. Please understand. I love you very, very much. I will see you after work. Sincerely, Akane. xxx). 

I crumpled up the note, throwing it into the trash. She really had thought everything through. Everything. There was no chance that I could escape. I couldn't use a lockpick of some kind because there were none, I couldn't exactly smash open the windows for an escape because that was a long drop, especially with two cinderblocks to drag me down. Besides, the chain was short, very short, so I wasn't able to pick it up and break down the door without possibly breaking or spraining a limb. I was definitely stuck here. I wanted to be more optimistic, but how can anyone be positive in the situation? I sat on the floor carefully, burying my face in my hands. How much more of this? How much longer? How much longer did I have to act like a tamed dog? All of these questions had no answer. I think, in fact, that the only answer was that I was going to be trapped forever. There had to be a way. There had to be some means of escape. Maybe she left something out. I hoped that maybe she accidentally left a spare key hidden in a drawer or that she dropped a hair pin while she was disposing of them-anything. If I could escape, I would have to go somewhere and hide out until I figure out what to do next. Move away, change schools, find a new job, change my name, phone number and e-mail address. I would have to start all over again and leave everything else behind without a word. What a fucking mess. It was either that or have Akane arrested for kidnapping and attempted murder. Who knows? Maybe she already killed before meeting me. Speaking of which, what if we never met in the first place? I kept wondering the possibilities. If I never met Akane then my life wouldn't be stuck at such a fucked up stage. But I also have to wonder, when did she come to fall in love with me in the first place? Maybe it was when we first met on her first day at Byakuden. Further back? I was unsure, but curious. The feeling of deja vu that I had. Have I really met Akane before? If so, when? The questions were driving me crazy. I thought back countless times but nothing came to mind. I sighed. It looked like I would have to ask her again when she returned. For now, I would have to kill time. 

The early hours of the evening arrived and Akane wasn't back yet. I was bored after hours of thinking. All I could do was try and think of an escape plan, all leading me to a dead-end. By dead-end I mean either failing the succeed or getting myself killed. I was even beginning to think that dying would be for the best. Maybe I should commit suicide somehow rather than let Akane keep me as a pet. But how? She hid every single knife in the house. She hid anything sharp, anything I could use to take my own life. It was depressing, really. But then I thought that I would give it another chance. That I would find a way. Death might have been the best option, but what would happen to Akane? If I died then what would she do? She would probably take her own life. I wouldn't care about that. I wouldn't feel guilty as I died myself. So why...Why do I want to not think of that? I mean, anyone would want such disturbing thoughts to go away, but...I couldn't comprehend. I didn't know why I felt this way. My chest hurt when I thought of Akane's sad expression upon seeing my corpse. She cried as she strangled me because she felt guilty, because she was scared of my death or me running away. Akane depended on me-on my very prescence. She needed someone to rely on because she was already so lonely. I remember the first time we met. At lunch, she sat alone. A woman as pretty as her, sitting all by herself. The day when we had our first "date" she sat all by herself on that bench with a sad expression. Akane didn't have anyone. No friends, no loving parents or a loving older sister. She was truely alone in the world. Thinking about it, I guess all she wanted was for someone to understand her. I knew what she was like from the moment that she presented that dead rabbit to me. In other words, she was just like me. We were both lonely. The only difference being that I could cope with that. I was okay with having a future with no one in it. Akane, however, doesn't want the same. She thought that a "soul-mate" was exactly what she needed, someone like me. Maybe she was right. This is a judgemental and cruel world. For people like us there is no hope of a normal future or even a future at all. Akane just needed someone to face the lonliness with her. I took a deep breath. I had to talk to Akane about all of this. I needed to get out of this situation through words and not physical actions. If what I said broke her heart then there would be nothing that I could do. If she killed me for it then so be it. Even if it's long and painful then I'll endure it. All of it. I'll feel the same pain that Akane would feel through my flesh and bones. But if I succeeded and she somehow understood, what then? Where would we go from there? 

"I'm home". Akane announced as she stepped through the door, locking it behind her. "Ah, there you are, Yuuya. I'm glad". She approuched me, setting down the grocery bags in her hands before kneeling down next to me. I sat on the floor, thinking about what I should say to her before she got home. How I would approuch the conversation, I wasn't sure. Akane kissed my cheek,mbrushing some strands of hair from my face. "I knew I could trust you. Maybe thinhs will work oit after all". Akane stood up with the bags, walking to the kitchen. It was now or never. "No, Akane". I said, stopping her in her tracks. She didn't turn to face me. She just stood there. I continued. "This won't work at all". I carefully stood up. "Akane, I'm not happy here-living like this. You know that. I kept my mouth shut for a whole week, but I've had enough. I can't do this anymore. I understand why you would keep me like this-I do. But this isn't the way. Listen, let me go already. Please". Akane stood there frozen, silently. Her lack of a response made me a little nervous. But I had to be strong in this situation. I couldn't take it back. I didn't want to take it back. Akane slowly turned towards me, her expression unreadable. I couldn't tell what she was feeling from such an emotionless expression. "S-so...Um, how does stew sound for dinner? I can make it right away". Just as I thought. Akane was in love with me. And because of that; I knew she would never hurt me. At least, I bet my life on it. If she was rwally going to hurt me then she would have done it already. The most she could do was kill me and then kill herself as a last resort. But that couldn't happen. "Akane, don't ignore what I'm saying. I understand what you're feeling-". "I know you do!" Akane suddenly raised her voice, slamming her hand on the kitchen counter once. "I know...You understand why I did this to you, then. I told you about the way my family treated me. Of course you're smart enough to figure out why I love you so much". "That's the thing, Akane. I don't think that you're in love with me. I think you just want to be loved by someone who knows what you went through. And, frankly, Akane, I-". "Don't. Please don't say it". Akane was weaker than I thought, although most of that is emotional weakness. "I know you don't love me. I bet you don't even like me after what I did to you. I know that you asked me to be your girlfriend so that I didn't do anything crazy like kill Kirisaki. But I almost did anyway and then you wanted to break up with me, so...". Akane knew all along. She knew how I really felt yet she still decided to bear with it, knowing that I could never love her back. 

What now? The room fell silent. Akane had turned fully towards me, her head lowered. This was strange. I thought that the climax of this story would be like Misery. Akane gets angry, tries to kill me, I try to kill her, I succeed in the end and carry on as if everything before never happened. But no. This atmosphere was silent and still. It was like we both gave up. That's what it seemed like. Akane approuched me slowly. I wanted to step back cautiously until she kneeled at my feet. Reaching into her purse she took out a cluster of keys. Holding out a single key, she unlocked the shackles with them. The chains dropped by my feet. What was she doing? Akane stood again, refusing to look at me. "I wondered what to do in the future. I even thought that there was no way we could have a future like this. As much as I wanted us to get married and have children, I knew at the back of my mind that it wasn't possible". Akane finally raised her head to look me in the eyes. I expected tears to fall from hers but there were none. "I still love you, Yuuya. I'll always love you from the bottom of my heart. Good bye". Akane walked away, towards the front door. Isn't this what I wanted? I wanted a civil break up just like this. I wanted Akane out of my life. But...Right now all I could think was "was that it?" As if I expected Akane to put up more of a fight. No, thos wasn't how it was supposed to go. I hated myself for expecting more and...I hated myself for letting Akane go. Just as she reached for the door handle, I made my decision. 

"...? Y-Yuuya...?" Akane didn't turn around. I almost unconsciously leaped for the door, placing both hands next to Akane to prevent her from leaving. This wasn't something that I would do, at least I think I wouldn't. Akane was just as surprised as I was. "I don't love you, Akane". I said it directly with sincerity, the words which Akane wished to never hear from me. However..."But I can learn to". Akane turned around then, our faces so close to eachother that our noses nearly touched. "Wha-...Y-Yuuya, you...I...". "I know, it sounds silly nad stupid coming from someone like me, but I don't want you do leave and then do something crazy. I know what's on your mind, Akane. You would rather die than lose me. You need someone like me to be there for you and love you. I can only do the former for now. But maybe in time I can love you like you want me to". Tears finally formed in Akane's eyes. Not of sadness or despair, but of true happiness. "What? I...Are you sure?" I nodded. "Yu-...Yuuya...Yuuya!" Akane jumped into my arms, wrapping her arms around my neck and burying her face into my shoulder as she cried. Maybe this was for the best. This wasn't for me, but for Akane's sake. She needed closure and a shoulder to cry on. I was the only one fit for that role. I would have to comfort her and let her lean on me when she needed it. It was for the best. Although I didn't love her now, I could try and love her. Who knows? Maybe one day she can get her confidence back and find someone else. If that happened then we could go back to being just friends. That's what I hoped for. Or perhaps I really would fall for this girl. No one could say. Whatever happens, things would be better from now on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought a lot about how I wanted to go about this chapter and I was unsure. Hopefully it came out okay. Nah, it probably sucked. I guess I really want to finish this fanfic-as much as I loved writing it. I just want to finish it and move on. I think it'll be two more chapters left.


	23. Starting Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's almost finished. I'm going to upload both chapters today so that I can move on from this story. I really loved writing this since I love giving Kizami attention in fanfictions. He needs more love. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy the final chapters of Kizami's Misery.
> 
> Warning: Contains Sexual Content. (Yup. Here you go. Enjoy).

After what happened a few nights ago, Akane decided to take me to Kyoto while it was still summer vacation. She said that we had to visit a very important place while we were there. At least, it was important to her. I went to Akane's apartment with my full bag of clothes and other neccessities for going on a trip. We would only be there for three days as Akane didn't want to stick around for too long. The main reason that she wanted to go was to get closure. She told me about the incedent with her family, how she murdered them in cold blood and ran away. I felt a slight sense of admiration for her. I had the idea of killing my family in my head so many times but, realistically, I knew I couldn't. There was a huge risk of getting caught and going to prison, as well as execution. I couldn't afford that. I had to wait until they all died of natural causes. That was one benifit of being the youngest. There was a good chance that I would be the last to die in old age. But Akane didn't wait for that. She suffered enough to kill her family so violently and brutally. And I wasn't going to report her to the police. I would protect her, even if the police did find her. We would have to run away together. I would be at risk anyway for harbouring a fugitive but I doubted I would be executed for that. 

Anyway, I arrived at her apartment, knowing that the door would be unlocked for me. "Akane? I'm here. I'm in the bedroom". I heard her voice from that exact spot, following it. Akane was in the middle of zipping her bag up when I entered. She wore a pretty summer dress, ocean blue with flowers and leaves decorated around the end of the dress, by her kness. "Ready yet?" I asked. "Uh-huh. I just have to bring a good book for the train ride". Akane turned to face me, her dress swaying as she did so. She was even more beautiful from the front. "Wow...ahem, s-sure. Go right ahead". Akane smiled at my embarrassment. I knew she was, even though I had averted my gaze from her. I did, however, turn my head back whenI heard the clinking of keys. Akane held a cluster of them in her hand, bringing out the right one. I didn't know where it lead but it made me curious. Akane unlocked the closet by her bed, the one that was locked before. Opening it, I saw stacks upon stacks of books inside. I thought she hid a corpse in there. Why books? "I've never seen someone keep their books under lock and key". "Well, it became a habit since I didn't want my parents to throw them out. Even though they aren't here, I'm still worried that I'll wake up one day and my precious stories will be gone. Fiction was always so precious to me because it was an escape from reality. Now I buy more adult fiction, even though there are still some fairy tales in here". Akane slipped out a random book from the pile, looking over the cover as if it was nostalgic. "This was the first adult romance that I ever read. It was so enchanting that I found it hard to put down. I was so envious forthe longest time, and now I'm not. I have you, after all. My sweet Yuuya". Akane approuched me, leaning up to kiss my cheek. "I don't mind if you don't love me yet. I just hope that you do someday". "I really will try, Akane. That's all you ever wanted in the world, isn't it?" She nodded. "Yes. I guess I didn't want to love someone, but to be loved. The very first time we met was a delusion of love. But now I really do love you, Yuuya. I'm in love with you". "I know. And I won't run away from it. I'll stay by you for as long as it takes, okay?" I took her hand in my comfortingly, rubbing my thumb on the back of her hand. I kissed her forehead. "Right, um, you should probably finish packing". "Yeah, I will. We can't miss the train, afterall". Akane pulled away from my grasp as she stored her book in another compartment of her bag. I sighed, checking my watch. 

The train ride was quiet. Akane sat in the seat in front of me and read her book without a sound. I stared out at the landscapes that rapidly passed us by on the bullet train. "You know, Yuuya,". I didn't realize that Akane had lowered her book. I looked in her direction. "There are a few places we can visit before going to "that" place. Tomorrow night is supposed to be the day of the summer festival. Did you bring a yukata?" "Nah, it's not for me". "Aww, that's a shame. I brought mine, along with a really expensive hairpin. You'll see". I guess Akane would suit a yukata or a kimono. She's like a porcelain doll. Clear and shiny eyes, smooth white skin, perfectly thick eyelashes. Yeah, she looks handmade by a very skilled craftsmen. "You can wear what you like, but you won't catch me in a yukata. It doesn't suit me at all". "I think you would look as handsome as you are now". Was that so? I could always wear one next year...No, I wouldn't. As much as I respect tradition, I havemy limits. A pair of jeans and a t-shirt is all I need. "So, are you nervous about you-know-what?" "Yeah, I am. I haven't been there in so long, it feels like years. I heard that no one has occupied the residents since then. It's just...empty". It almost sounded like Akane was sad about it all. But I doubted that she regretted what she did. After all the shit that her family dragged her through, I wasn't shocked that she would resort to such a brutal and violent act. Akane played with the trinket on her necklace, presented her nervousness to me without realising. It was the necklace I had bouht for her. She never wore any other necklace. I sat back in my seat, returning to watching the world go by right outside the train window.

We headed straight to the hotel after arriving. Apparantly it was built over the last hotel after a fire destroyed it, along with many jobs. That's what Akane told me, anyway. The room was neat and tidy, as you would expect most hotel rooms to be. The walls were coloured a calm red, the carpet and drapes a cream white. The windows had been opened by room service, allowing a cool breeze to drift inside and the loose drapes to flutter along it. We placed our bags on the chester drawers on the opposite side of the double bed. Yes, we had to share a bed. Might as well b mature about it. There was nothing to be embarrassed about. We shared a bed before but this was more...It was what couples had, right? Couples would normally share a bed if they lived together or...A-anyway, we settled in the room, storing our stuff away until we needed it for the next three days and three nights. Tomorrow, the next day and the day we leave. "Yuuya, you don't mind sharing a bed, do you?" "O-of course not. We have shared one before remember?" "Yeah. Yeah, you're right". The train ride was quite long, taking is into the early hours of the evening. "Want to get dinner in the hotel and explore tomorrow?" "Good idea. I'm pretty tired anyway". When we got back I would of liked to hear more about want happened since Akane was quite brief. We headed for the restaraunt on the ground floor, just next to the lobby. The interior design of the lobby was exactly like the rooms, except with birch wood floors. A few people were scattered in the lobby, waiting to be called by receptionists. 

We went through the pane glass double doors to the hotel restaraunt. A young waitress greeted us and lead us to an empty table. "Thank you". "Thanks...". "Can I get you both a drink?" "Just some green tea, please". "Same here". "Okay, then. I'll be right back with your drinks and a couple of menus". She left us alone. Music was playing quietly in the backround, music from a piano. This felt like another date, only more formal than our usual dates. It was our first formal date. "I wish I put on a nicer dress". "Don't worry about it. You look lovely". Akane blushed a light pink at my comment. I would usually only say something so sickly to keep face, but I was being homest with Akane. She looked lovely anyway. "This makes a nice date, doesn't it?" "Yeah, you're right. We could go somewhere like this back home if you'd like". We were having a normal conversation as a couple. Akane was being cautious here so we couldn't exactly talk about what happened with her family in public. She was composing her self quite well even though she knew what was to come. Returning to the scene of the crime, as it were. I was preparing myself too as I didn't know what would come of it. Would Akane actually get closure from it? 

Night fell, even though it was still light outside due to the summer weather. I went ahead to close the window in order to stop the summer draft from blowing in. I got to see our view for a moment, a garden view. "Um, is it alright if I use the bath first?" Akane asked sheepishly. "Oh, go ahead. I can wait". "Thanks. I'll be as quick as I can". "No, take your time". Akane then left for the bathroom. I sighed deeply as I relaxed on the bed. Different thought went through my mind as I listened to the rapidly running water of the bath. I closed my eyes and just listened, leaning the back of my head on my forearm, like a pillow. My mind wandered until I thought of something interesting. I didn't techinically tell Akane that I loved her but I did saythat I wanted to. If I want to love her and she still loves me then...("Would you make love to me?"). Her words echoed in my head. I sat up quickly, shaking my head to drive those thoughts away. Even if I was a seventeen-year-old man, I couldn't think like that. That would be taking advantage! I'm not like that. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm not. I am not like that. Although, it is normal to want those things, isn't it? For someone my age, at least. I thought I was asexual, that I didn't like anyone but...I can't help but think of Akane so differently. Did she really want those things too, or did she only think that she wanted those things? I didn't want to scare her or put her on the spot. I could control myself, I've been surpressing my blood-lust for nine years so how is this kind of lust any different? After about fifteen minutes, I heard knocking at the bathroom door from the inside. "Uh, Yuuya. I forgot to bring my clothes in with me. Could you please get them?" What? At least she wouldn't change in front of me. "S-sure. Just hang on". I got her floded pajama's from the dresser drawer, carefully opening the bathroom door and making sure not to look inside as I slipped them in. "H-here...". "Thank you. Sorry again". The door closed once I retracted my hand and sighed. "Hooo...What is wrong with me?" I said quietly to myself. 

I had my own bath once Akane had finished changing. Stepping out, fully clothed in sweatpants and a sleeveless t-shirt, I sat down next to Akane on the bed while drying my hair. She combed her hair through each damp strand that stopped at her waist. "Isn't that a pain to dry?" I asked, ruffling my own hair. "Uh-huh, but you get used to it. Washing and drying such long hair". I lay back, placing my arms behind my head to rest. "Yuuya, you know what the Statue of Limitations is, right?" "Of course. It means that when a case goes on for a certain amount of time with very little progress then it legally never happened after a set amount of years". "Mm-hm, smarty-pants. The Statue of Limitations on the case of my family is supposed to end within another nine years. It was originally set for ten so it's already been a year". "Is that so? After that it legally never happened and you can get off the hook?" "Just as long as they don't find anything. If they find any evidence that leads to me being the killer then the case ends with my imprisonment and execution. But I made sure that won't happen". Akane placed down her comb, crawling to me and kneeling right beside me. She collected her hands in her lap. "To tell you the truth, even though I left no evidence, I'm scared. The police may think that Akira is dead but if they ever found out that I was in hiding...". "They won't find you. I know they won't". It was all I could say to reassure her. I didn't even know if it helped. "Ten years. I'll be twenty-six when the Statue of Limitations runs out on the case. I hope by then that...". Akane paused, grabbing her shirt tightly. "Akane...?" "I hope by then...you fall in love with me. Maybe we would have a family by then". It was a lot to say considering how old we were now. She had high hopes for us. Akane really wanted a family with me. She wanted my partnership and my children. Maybe, in time, I would give those things to her. Maybe then I could learn to love and be happy. But I would never get married. For now I didn't give her a proper answer. "Someday, perhaps". I simply gave her a small amount of hope that it might happen. "We should get some sleep". "Okay. I'm sleepy, anyway". Getting under the covers, Akane cuddled into me with a content sigh. "Goodnight, Yuuya". "Goodnight, Akane. Sleep well". I closed my eyes, once again listening to the silence. 

The very next evening was the night of the summer festival. During the day, we explored the town and got lunch at a local ramen place. We even found where the festival would take place. By tradition, it would be near a well-known shrine in the town. People were setting up stalls for games and snacks like any summer festival. I wondered if Kurosaki was doing the same back home. Like every year, after trips, everyone would get together and enjoy the festival. I was dragged along by Kurosaki and I would actually enjoy it sometimes. I waited in the room while Akane got ready. I stared up at the ceiling for a while in thought. "Okay, I'm ready". Akane called out as the bathroom door opened. I turned my head to see her, my eyes widening in surprise. "How do I look?" "Uh...". I was a bit speechless. Akane wore her yukata, of course. It was a dark red with a black sash around the waist. An image of a white lily was printed just above the breast of her yukata, along with a few smaller ones decorated at the bottom. Her purse was the same colour with a ribbed strap. A bundle of strands from her hair was tied and held together with the hairpin that she mentioned, also a dark red, while most of her hair was still down at her waist. She was..."Beautiful...". I muttered honestly. Akane giggled, holding out her hand for me to take it. "Ready to go?" She asked. I stood, taking it and locking the fingers. "Yeah. Let's go so we don't miss out". "Are we going to watch the fireworks?" "Of course. I heard they are setting them up at the bottom of the hill behind the shrine so we'll have a good view". A few people came out of their rooms as we did, dressed in yukatas and wearing smiles of excitement for the event. Darkness shed outside with only street lamps to light the way. You could see many people from the town head in the same direction, towards the festival. We didn't arrive too early so the festival was obviously packed with people. For such a small town there were plenty of tourists visiting the country for the summer. "So, what do you wanna do first?" Akane asked as we walked through the crowd and the stalls. "I don't mind, anything's fine but we should get something to eat in about half-an-hour". "Yep. Then we can visit the shrine and watch the fireworks". 

After playing several of the challenging games that the festival had to offer, Akane brought me to the forests by the festival. She didn't really give an explanation so I was a bit concerned. Holding my hand she dragged me through dead shrubbery and sticks, breaking under our feet. "Akane, where are we going?" I asked for a second time. "You'll see. Be patient, mister man". I looked around the darkness. It looked like the perfect place to commit a murder without anyone hearing. The culprit could easily hide a body within the labyrinthine of trees and ditches. Eventually we came to an opening, the sky and the moon showering the earth below. A slight hill came into view, an old wooden bench at the top. Akane let go of my hand but continued walkimg to the secluded spot on the hill. She appeared to be looking around the area, or more accurately the landscapes beyond that. "There it is. Come up here so I can show you". I followed with less hesitation. Standing by her side, I followed her gaze. Beyond the shrine and the goings-on of the festival, in the far distance, was a house. No, more like a mansion. Akane stared at it, mesmerised by the view. "That's it. That's the family manor". Akane sat down on the bench, still staring out. I sat with her and awaited an explaination. "We're going there tomorrow. I'm scared but I want to go. I need to face it and then put it all behind me so that I can move on". Akane looked away, leaning back into the old wood of the bench. "Since everyone is dead, Akira would have to inherit the money that her father left behind. But Akira is dead so I don't know where it'll all go. She won't need it where she's going". Akane spoke of her true self in third person as if she was talking about a completely different person. I felt it too. Akane was the only one here to me, there was no Akira. "I don't need his stupid inheritance. I don't need any of that. For the first time in my life, I actually have a life. I'm free and no one can change that". She was right. I certainly wouldn't be able to keep her from her freedom. "I make my own money from now on. I live my own life". "Of course you do, Akane. Of course". I wrapped an arm around her and held her close, kissing the top of her head. Suddenly there was a loud pop from the sky, followed by sizzling. The fireworks had started. Many different bright colours filled the sky, exploding each colour outward. "So,". I began. "do you really want to do this tomorrow?" Akane nodded. "Yes. I want to see what's become of the place". We watched the fireworks go off until it ended, my arm around Akane the whole time. "They're really pretty, aren't they?" And for a moment, she forgot about tomorrow. Even for just a moment as she stared at the bright colours in the dark sky.

We decided to go during the evening the next day, while it was still bright outside. The sky had turned orange as the sun was gradually falling. Akane, like the other night, held my hand as she led the way. We came to a road and a bus stop, behind that was a path going through more woodlands. Walking down the path, a wall eventually crossed our path. "This is it. We should go around the front enterance". "This is tresspassing. Shouldn't we just stay outside". "No one will find out. If the police have investigated within a year I doubt that they would come back". That might have been true but what if they had a caretaker come by and clean the estate every once in a while? Surprisingly the large gates weren't locked or even closed. We slipped inside the front yard, heading inside the estate through the unlocked front door. Maybe someone was here after all. Inside was huge, as expected of a manor. There was no furniture as I'm sure that they would have cleared everything away since there was no longer an owner for any of it. Akane let go of my hand and stepped forward. She looked around the whole hallway from the floors to the ceilings. "Akane...Are you alright?" "It seems smaller, somehow". She said, ignoring my question. "Even without all the furnitue it seems so much smaller and less like a cage. I've never seen any of those windows open before". I looked up above to the windows lined near the ceiling. Each one was open, shedding the evening light into the house. "Father died in this very hallway". Akane mumbled. "Sister, too". I approuched Akane, wrapping my arms around her in confort. "Do you want to know? Whare they are, I mean". "Sure. If you don't mind". 

Akane took me to the backyard, passing the kitchen where her mother was killed. She led me through a maze in the garden, consisting of many twists and turns. That is until we reached an old, worn wooden shed. "Are they...underneath?" Akane nodded. "Nothing but toothless skelentons". I imagined the skeletons of Akane's parents in a heap, carelessly thrown inside and buried deeply within the earth. "And...your sister?" "I have to keep that one a secret. Sorry. It's better if we forget her first". Akane walked away from the shed. I followed, refusing to pay any respect to her parents. They weren't worth it. The only offerings we could give them was contempt. "Akane, why did you really want to come here? It wasn't just for closure, was it?" Akane stopped, a distant smile on her lips. "You got me. I wanted to see this place one last time before it was burned to the ground. I'm going to come back someday and burn everything, right after the Statue of Limitations ends. The police can only see it as an accident, legally. This place should have burned a long time ago. I don't regret what I did. Not at all". "I don't blame you. But now that you laughed about all of this, isn't it best to forget it? To move on?" "You're right but I can't move on until the investigation ends. I have to hide for as long as it takes, even if the police don't know who I am". "Then I'll wait right beside you until it's over". I wrapped my arms around Akane without thinking. "Just forget about it and try to move on. No, you have to move on. In the future, I'm going to end up forgetting about my family. I'll live my own life without them in it. Can't you do the same?" Akane buried her face into my chest, wrapping her arms around my waist. "I'll try. There's a lot that I want to put behind me. If I'm going to start anywhere it might as well be here. I can start again from the beginning". "That's my girl. It's getting dark. We should go back to the hotel and rest". "Right. Thank you so much, Yuuya". "No problem". 

I unlocked our door, stepping inside with Akane right behind me. I closed the door with a tired sigh. What a long vacation, despite it only being three days. I sat on the edge of the bed beside Akane, nearly collapsing backwards. "So, do you feel like you got closure?" "Definitely. Thanks". "Good...". I kissed Akane's cheek. She kissed me back, on the lips just as I was pulling away. We paused for a moment, lingering. Leaning in again, our lips met. Akane parted her's, allowing me to slip my tongue inside to meet her own. It became a little heated, Akane moaning into my lips shamelessly. The heat on her face grew as I slid my hand up her thigh and under her black dress. I quickly pulled away, retracting my hand when I realised my actions. "S-sorry, I got carried away. It won't happen again". Damn it! "No, no, it's okay". Akane placed her hand on my cheek. "What? Really-you're okay with...". She pressed the tip of her nose to mine as she whispered. "Please don't hold back". Whaaat? Was this really okay? Here? Now? I didn't think about it for too long. My men's instict was the reason for my sudden excitement. I gulped, desperately wanting to continue. Shit. I would end up going too far and probably end up hurting her, but I didn't think. Instead I kissed Akane's lips again, moving around so that I was behind her. She leaned her back into my chest. I could feel my own heartbeat through her back. "Nervous...?" I asked. "Yes, but I'm okay if it's you. As I said, don't hold back. Do what you like". I couldn't do that. I had to have limits somewhere. The intensity of the situation was killing me so I did what came to mind. I reached out, both hands touching Akane's breasts over the clothes. "Mn...". "Are you okay?" "Of course. Keep going because I won't tell you to stop". I pushed my palms against her covered flesh, feeling them resist and push back like a rubber mattress. Even over the dress and bra they still felt really big. The smell of Akane's hair was right at my nose which only excited me more. I squeezed her breasts once, feeling them resist again under my fingers. I soon began to play with them as I saw fit, rolling them around softly in different directions while pushing my palms against them. "Hya-ahh, ha, hah, mn, nn, ah...". Akane moaned and panted softly at my movements. I nibbled at the shell of her delicate ear, making her flinch. "Hnyah! Ah, Hmn...". So her ears were sensitive? It made me want to experiment a little. I licked and nibbled at every inch of her ear from the shell to the lobe. Akane squeaked and moaned, unable to hold them back as I was also touching her breasts. Speaking of which, I lowered the top part of her dress, allowing her bosom to spring from comfinement. She was wearing a black laced bra, her nipples presented under the clothing as they were already hard. I didn't comment as that would only embarrass her more. "D-do you like them?" Akane suddenly asked, her voice weak from the pleasure. "Um...Well...". I didn't want to answer in the first place but she asked so suddenly. "Would there be a problem if I did?" "No. Don't men usually prefere big breasts?" "I guess, but I'm not looking at that". "Liar, hehe...". Good thing I was behind her so that she couldn't see me blush. 

I continued. Rubbing my thumb over one of her nipples through the clothing. "Hna, ah, ahn-ahh...That...feels weird...Hn...". Hearing her sweet voice was arousing. I clenched my lower regions, feeling the heat grow. Akane must have felt the same by now. With that in mind, I raised the skirt of her dress up her thighs. She moved momentaraly so that it went over her bottom. I couldn't see her underwear from the rest of the skirt but it didn't matter. Just as long as I could reach to pleasure her more. I felt the crease in the middle of her panties with my fingers. With the middle one, I rubbed the small button there, raising Akane's voice. "Yah! Ah-aa! Mn, nn, hn! Hah, ha, ah, aa...". I played with one of her breasts still, eventually pulling both cups down. With that, I also managed to slip the rest of her dress off. I neglected the fact that her knee-high socks were still on and continued my ministrations. Cupping one breast again, I also started rubbing her lower regions again through her underwear. Already, a wet patch formed in the center. "Hmah-ah, ah, haah, a-ah! Yuuya...Yuuya...". Akane whispered my name, grabbing my shirt from behind. I felt like it was her way of either wanting me to stop or to do more. I went witht the latter, not wanting to stop. Taking hold of either side of her panties, I slipped them up her thighs, to her knees and let them drop to her ankles. "Mmn...!" Akane tensed up, bringing her thighs together. "What's wrong?" I asked. "I-it's...breezy...mn...". I took it upon myself to spread her legs out for more reach. I dipped my fingers back inbetween her legs, finding her enterance under the thin layer of hair. I pushed my finger inside slowly, moving it in and out for her to gradually get used to it. There was no use in rushing. "Hng! Nn! Ah, hah, aa, hm-nn!" I moved it in further, following the same process. I played with her breast, rubbing the nipple with my thumb. Her soft flesh sucked my fingers in, pushing back as I pressed in. Pushing a second finger inside, Akane let every moan escape her lips as she struggled to keep them in. I rubbed against her hot walls. Her legs were visibly shaking. She was having trouble just staying up. "Akane, would you like to lie down?" "Mn...Y-yes, please". I pulled my fingers out, moving around and letting Akane fall back onto the bed. Once I got back on top, my eyes widened. 

Looking at Akane, I felt flustered. I had made such a mess of her. She was trembling, wet and already exhausted. I gulped, heat covering my whole body. I removed my shirt and tossed it to the floor. Leaning back down, I met Akane in another kiss. Pushing my tongue past her lips, she moaned. Her fingers ran through my hair and I found myself reaching for her enterance again to finish preparing her. Akane gripped my hair tightly, her nails digging into my scalp once I pushed my fingers inside again. I pulled away from the kiss, Akane's hands falling lifelessly at either side of her head. I kissed her cheek and jawline, moving each downward as I moved the fingers of my right hand inside of her. My left hand, however, touched one of her breasts as my lips did. This was my first time doing something like this-all of it. I never thought of these things until now. Being with a woman like this was odd to me. I didn't quite understand why I was reacting this way, physically, but my body seemed to go along with it. I had an erection already, which was also a first. My body was so hot and I had these strange desires to do these things to Akane. But I did them. I did what felt right. My fingers moved back and forth inside while my other hand and tongue worked on her chest. Akane's voice was loud and sensual, revealing all of the pleasure and pain that I was giving her. "Ah-ow! Th-that hu-uu, mm! Ah, hhah! Ahn! Wah-ah! O-ouch! Yu-Yuuya!" Even as she cried in pain from the rough movement of my fingers, her juices flowed around them and spilled on the bedsheets. She was even moving her hips a little. I eventually pulled all three out, more fluids erupting from inside. I sat up. If Akane wasn't a mess before she certainly was now. "Are you alright? I'm sorry if I was too rough, I couldn't help myself". "N-no, it's alright". Akane forced a smile, her chest heaving. I kissed her again, softly. "Haah...Are you ready?" Akane nodded. "Yes. I am". "Can you turn around on you hands and knees? It may be easier that way for me to...ahem, you know...". "A-alright. I can try". I helped Akane move into position. She faced the wall with me behind her. I helped her out of her underwear which was still at her ankles, just to spread her legs out further. I saw her enterance for myself. I didn't know what to think and I didn't stare for long. Akane was shaking under me, her arms especially from holding herself up. "Akane, try to move down, rest your arms and chest on the mattress so that you don't struggle to stay up". "O-okay...". She did so, causing her rear to only go higher. I didn't look though. 

Undoing the front of my pants, I let my erection come out. It was hard and pulsing with heat. In other words, neglected and begging for release. I took hold of Akane's hips and positioned myself. "Alright, it's going in. Try to relax, Akane". I made my first move, slowly pushing the tip inside. "Gh, ah...aahh...". "Nah...a-ah, ah, uwah, a-ah!" I kept going, pushing half inside. Things tightened around me quickly, causing me to stop halfway. "Gyah, aah...So tight...It's so tight...". My neglected manhood was suffering for this, the pain covering every inch. I wanted to move but I had to let Akane to get used to it. "Y-Yuuya, it's okay. Hnn! Na-haah...You can m-move...". "I can't move. It's so tight that I can't move without hurting you. Gyah...god, it hurts...". Akane sighed deeply in her own pain. But she persisted. Slowly she backed her hips into me, pushing more inside. "Nah! Aaahh! Ahh!". "Gah! Ahh...Akane, n-no...A-ah!" Her initiative forced me to move as well, forward. Until I couldn't go anymore I pulled back and then forward, back and forth, back and forth slowly and painfully. "Ah, ahh, a-ahh, ah, hah, gah!" I moaned and groaned as I moved, feeling Akane's hole loosen around me. Eventually I could thrust faster. "Hyah, ah, ah, ah, aah! Na, agh! Ah! Ah! Hyah! Ahh!" Akane cried and moaned as I moved faster, still moving her own hips by force. When I thrust hard, I heard a breaking sound along with a loud cry from Akane. "GYAH! Ah! Haah...". I stopped thrusting to give her a minute. Droplets of bood managed to squeeze their way out from her abused enterance and run down her thighs. "Are you alright? Do you want me to pull out?" "N-no! Keep going. Please, Yuuya, keep going". I hesitated but did as she asked, taking it slowly again. Akane was in pain again so it was best to take our time. Eventually I picked up speed again as Akane started moving her hips again. I gripped her hips securely as I moved, leaning my back to hers for more leaverage. I felt like I would come at any moment. Sweat ran down my back and my face was hot. I was so close already. I needed release. "F-fuck! Akane, I'm co-coming!" "I, I think I am too. It feels so h-heavy and weird! Gyah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ahh! Aahh! So close! Yuuya! Yuuya~! Ah! Ah! Uwa-aahhh!" Akane tightened around me, causing me to come inside, my own fluids colliding with hers. Arching my back, I cried out her name, moving my hips to finish my orgasm. When I finally pulled out I was unsteady as Akane was. She collapsed on her side as the fluids spilled from her enterance. She struggled to unhook her bra, throwing it to the floor when she finally did. I pulled off her socks, tossing them as well before collapsing next to her. Looking at her, I saw the smile cross her face. I reached out, allowing her to take my hand. "Yuuya, I love you so much". "I...I think I love you too, Akane". She crawled up to me, resting her head on my chest. We were both exhausted. Some sleep was all we needed. But first, a clean up. 

Birds could be heard chirping outside our hotel window. Morning had arrived after such a long night. I rubbed my eyes, groaning, before opening them. The ceiling met my gaze before I looked to my side, where Akane slept. She was kneeling on the mattress, beside me, stretching. Her chest was exposed to me before she grabbed the bed covers, covering herself with them. She noticed my staring and smiled. "Good morning, Yuuya". She said softly. Akane looked so perfect this morning. Her hair wasn't as messy as you would expect. She wasn't even dazed. "Um, good morning. Did you sleep well?" "Mm-hm. It was lovely". I sat up too, yawning. Looking at Akane, she shifted a few strands of hair behind her ear. "Are you still in pain?" "A little. You were quite rough last night". "Oh, sorry. I got over-excited. Is it bad or is it just a little painful, like you said?" "Just a little. I should be fine. My legs are still shaking, though". "I see. Do you need help walking to the bathroom?" "Yes, please". Akane kissed my cheek affectionately. The sweet smell of her hair lingered by my nose. I inhaled it, wrapping my arms around her bare body to kiss her lips. That was that. Akane and I finally slept together for the first time. I could describe it in so many ways. All in all it was just...amazing. I guess we would do it again and again. I felt really attatched to Akane for the first time. We were really connected by "love". I suppose I do love her in a strange way. And she loves me. That puts the whole friends idea out the window. "I'm going to take a shower. Do you want to come with me, Yuuya?" "...Um, sure. Yeah, let's take one together". I was going to be Akane's boyfriend for a while longer, it seemed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this stuff between a man and a woman is so weird to me because I'm so used to writing yaoi by now. These will be rare. Man x Woman will be a rare item in my stories.


	24. Happy Ending

"Akane, come on, we're going to be late". "I'm almost ready!" Waiting for Akane outside her room, I was tempted to enter and dress her myself. The summer holidays were over and we could all go back to school and prepare for this terms exams. That meant keeping my distance from Akane so that I could study with Kurosaki, like we always did. Akane finally exited her room, wearing her summer uniform as I did. "Alrighty, let's go". "About time". Exiting the apartment complex, we held hands like we usually did now. I guess I didn't mind presenting the fact that I had a girlfriend now so there would be no more issues during valentines and so on. "Hey, you two". Kurosaki greeted us at the station. "Hi, Kurosaki-kun". "Hey, Kurosaki. Are we still studying at your house tomorrow?" "Absolutely. It'll be fun, aside from the studying part". "Couldn't agree with you more". All of us got on the next train, passing conversation about varies things. "I have to congratulate you, Akane-chan, for getting dear Kizami over here to open up more. I've never seen him so cheery before. What's your secret?" "Exactly. It's a secret". "Is it dirty-ouch!" I punched Kurosaki's arm, making Akane giggle at our shenanigans. Honestly, it was nice.

I walked into school with Akane's hand in mine, students staring at us in surprise, even more so when gave Akane a shameless goodbye kiss. "See you in a bit". "Right. Here's your lunch. I made your favorites". "Thank you, Akane". "There's something that I have to take care of, okay?" "Alright. Go ahead". I let go of her hand, watching students stare at her as she changed her shoes and walked down the hallway. Kurosaki came up to me during homeroom that morning, patting my shoulder. "So, Kizami~. How's the sex?" He whispered. It was embarrassing of him to ask. "I don't know what you mean". I said, packing up my stuff. "Come on~~. I'll keep it a secret~". I sighed, trying to hide a smile. "It's, uh, good, actually". "Yes!" Kurosaki raised his voice, slinging his arm around my shoulder. "My boy's all grown up! He's a man now!" "Does that mean you're still a boy?" "Why did you have to bring that up?" He started it. I chuckled. Sex doesn't make me a man. Maturity makes a boy become a man, mentally. At least, that's what I believed. 

During lunch, I walked out of class to see Akane talking with Kirisaki. I managed to overhear. "So, you see, I'm really sorry about what happened-I took it too far and I really hurt you. I'm so, so sorry, Kirisaki-chan. You don't have to forgive me, hate me all you want, but just know that I regret it. If you can find it in your heart to forgive me I would like us to be friends". Kirisaki stood there with her arms crossed as if she was putting Akane on trial. I was about to step in when Kirisaki spoke. "Hayashi-san, do you...really love Yuuya that much?" Akane hesitated but nodded. "Does he love you?" "He does but you can even ask him yourself if you don't believe me". Kirisaki sighed deeply, reaching her hand out to Akane. "...?" "Okay, we can be friends. After all, I should also be sorry for trying to get in the way of you two like I did". "It's okay. I'm the one at fault the most. But I'm glad we can be friends". Akane accepted the handshake from Kirisaki. Good. They sorted out their differences. "As much as I loved Yuuya myself, I won't get in the way this time. I can be happy if I can still keep his friendship". "I'm glad". Kirisaki left the scene. Akane spotted me and walked towards me. "How did I do?" "You did well. That was very mature of you to apologise". "Thanks...". I hugged Akane. She really had matured since we slept together for the first time, maybe even before then. I was glad that she moved on from so much. 

That night, after school, I brought Akane back to my apartment for dinner. It was kind of intense since we were alone. After having dinner we got kind of impatient. So we ended up under the sheets of my futon. "Hah, haah, ah, aah...". Akane moaned as I sucked one of her nipples, hearing her whines as I pulled on it with my teeth. "Nyah! Ah, haah...Yuuya...". Akane panted my name, causing me to stop and pull away. "Haah...What's wrong?" Akane smiled at me, carressing my cheek with her hand. "I love you". It didn't matter how many times she said it. I knew she did and I wouldn't forget it. I kissed her sweet lips softly, whispering. "I love you, too". I wouldn't let Akane slip away from my side if she was happy being there. She really needed me. This was my first real love, no matter what happened during the course of our relationship until now. I would respect her, I would never hurt her, I would stand by her, I would never betray her, I would love her for her. Because of Akane I have these knew emotional sensations stirring up in my heart. I'm unsure if all of them are good, but somewhere inside I feel safety and warmth. Maybe it really is love. The fact that I want to treasure and protect her must be a sign of that. Her dark hair, cutting down at her perfectly curved waist, her dark blue eyes like mine, her pale white skin, her purple scar at her waist, forever there as a memory, her sweet laugh and voice, her total devtion to me. I'll treat her like a rare jewel, making sure that she never breaks or recieves another scratch. And as a person I choose to love her for as long as it takes. "Akane...I love you. I really do". "I love you too, Yuuya". My heart races and I can't seem to hold back. "Akane, I...I think I'm gonna come". "I haven't even touched you. Are you that excited?". "Yeah, it's killing me. Ah...I want to come". "Yuuya...". Akane kissed me deeply. My heart pounded and I couldn't hold back the short spurt from my erection. "Wah! Oh my, have you pent up all of this? Do you want to let it all out?" I nodded, moving my hips slightly against my hand. "Then you can enter already. I don't mind". Akane's eyes glowed in the darkness, her cheeks red and a soft smile across her lips. She was really gorgeous. Never had I felt so attatched to anyone before. My body shook with excitement, and I took her offer. 

Raising up her legs and spreading them out, I slowly pushed myself inside. "Mnah! Ah, haah, hah! Ah!" "Akane-ah! Haah, haa, aah...". "Yuuya...!" Akane wrapped her arms around my neck, nuzzling into it with soft cries and gasps. She was obviously in pain, but wished to endure it...for me. I pushed all I could inside for now, pulsing around the heat and the pain. I had to let Akane get used to it first. She panted heavily, fidgeting under me with small moans. "Mn, nn...Yuuya, move, please. It's u-uncomfortable". "Try to get used to it first. It hurts for me too". I carressed her hot cheek, seeing her face flush even more. Idecided to move eventually when my patience became very thin and I could no longer endure the pain. "A-ahn! Akane!" "Hmn! Nn! Hah, ah-ah! Aah! Haah! Hah! Agh! Ah! Yuuya...Faster...". I dug my nails into her thighs, speeding up in my thrusts-even as Akane squeezed around me. I could feel myself begin to leak from the pleasure that was starting to arise. My body moved on autopilot, my conscious self feeling the intense pleasure and the heat in my stomach. I thrust harder on my own, hearing Akane's sweet yelps and cries of pleasure. "Whah! Ah! Ah-ah-aah! Aah! Yah! Ah! Aah! Yu-ahn! Ah! Haah! Hah!" I must have hit her good spot as she only clenched around me more. I could already feel my release that had built up for years without experiencing any kind of sexual pleasure. "Ah! Akane, I'm coming! I'm going to-wah-ah! Aaaah!" I pushed my hips forward, hard and fast and released, gripping Akane's thighs tightly in my long-awaited orgasm. Akane cried out, loudly, having her own release as I did. I ended up collapsing on top of her, exhausted and hot from the activity. I raised my head to look at Akane, seeing her smile as she panted breathlessly. "Hehe...". She giggled quietly, cupping my cheek. "We did it again". "Yeah, we did. It felt incredible". "Uh-huh. Hm, I kind of want to do it again". "Again? I think you'll end up killing me". "Hahaha, no I wouldn't". The tips of our noses touched as we shared a brief moment of laughter. When we opened our eyes again, they met. "I love you so much, Yuuya". "I think I love you too, Akane". I pressed my lips to hers softly, feeling her smile against my lips. This was love, it really was. I could feel it. The warmth, the pounding of my heart, the knowledge that I couldn't let Akane go so easily. Despite all that happened, despite our personalities, despite her past, I can't help but feel this way. It's strange. No matter how much I denied it before I really feel like this could be it. This was what happiness felt like, true happiness that would hopefully last forever. No matter where we went, Akane would follow right beside me, holding my hand and telling me that she loves me. And that makes me happy, because I know I feel the exact same way.

~THE END~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally over!!!!!! Now I can move on! Thank you for reading Kizami's Misery everyone! I hope you enjoyed and I'll see you in the next long story. Until then, bye!


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